Well, well, well, things are certainly changing...

by bluesbreaker59 11 Replies latest jw friends

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  bluesbreaker59

  You know here lately, my life has had lots of ups and downs. This was my first year of not going to District Convention, my (step) grandpa developed brain cancer, my dad and most of his family won't speak to me, and my girlfriend and I were having troubles. On the other hand, my mom and her side of the family have embraced me, my cousin (that left the borg) and I are closer than ever, my girlfriend is super, my band plays all the time, and I've got a great group of friends.

  However, recently, I've been sharing the research I've done with my cousin (unbaptized, but marked), then today I shared it with one of my old witness buddies that quit going about 3 years ago and moved out of state. My cousin (dad's side) and I have been life long best friends, he was "marked" at age 16 for smoking, and now lives with his fiancee, and the family still speaks to him. So he's heard that they aren't speaking to me anymore, so he's been brow beating them into talking to me, and telling them how cult like their tactics are of cutting me off. He's been doing his own research too, and was AMAZED at much of the info on Russell and Rutherford, and also the Society in general.

  For some background, my cousin and I have had "doubts" since we were at least 12 or so. Around 14 they started pressuring us to get baptized, well, I fell for it, and at 15 I did the deed. Well my cousin, was constantly "studying the questions" but he never got baptized. He realized back then that something "wasn't right" and that he didn't want that kind of commitment. So we used to share our opinions with each other, like how we were always suspicious of the donations, and also of exactly who the governing body were and why weren't allowed to question them. There were also certain beliefs, like birthdays, certain holidays, Armageddon, etc, that we just never really believed.

  Tonight my other friend and I are comparing notes, on what research that we've found, and discuss. Then in a couple months, the three of us are planning on getting together and trying to figure out how to get our families out.
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  Mum

  Life is like that, a constant mix of tragedy and comedy. Life sounds more good than bad right now for you, blues.

  All the best,

  SandraC
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  eclipse

  That's awesome, blues!

  I wish you all the best in your endeavor to get your family out.
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  LeslieV

  Just remember to go slow with your family. If you start hitting them with all kind of information at once, it just makes them defensive and they shut down. Alittle at a time seems to be the best.

  Remember right now the rank and file is being told to watch out for apostates. So if they even have a hint they think you are an apostate they will not listen to anything, and will feel justified in shunning you and your cousin. Good luck let us know how it is working out for you.

  Leslie
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  ex-nj-jw

  That's great news BB, just remember to feed them little bits at a time.

  nj
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  Mrs Smith

  Just try to make them think for themselves by planting little seeds of doubt. Baby Steps. Good luck
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  bluesbreaker59

  Well my friend and I had a conversation last night and compared everything that we've read, and studied. He came to some interesting conclusions in his research, some similar to mine, and others that were way off from mine. Basically he feels that while there are many issues with the organization, including things like:

  1. Birthdays - not really much Biblical backup for this

  2. Founder of the org - He has many issues with Russell as do I, but he said, basically after he passed the borg started doing things more closely following the bible instead of incorporating pyramidology, etc. I still believe that you must look at the past, and the history, to determine ANY organizations worth, its also a good indicator of the future, generally speaking.

  3. Predictions - what is it Zero for Seven now???

  4. Judicial Committees - no Biblical backup for this (only IF the sinner wants the guidance of the "older men")

  5. Smoking - I personally believe the bible addresses this, he does not feel that it does sufficiently.

  6. Other man made rules - how to dress, how to have sex, certain music, tatoos, certain holidays, etc.

  7. Molest cases - even though its an issue, we don't think there is necessarily any greater % than any other group, the issue is the reporting.

  HOWEVER, he stated a couple times, that he thinks, generally speaking that the witnesses have many truths, and have many good principles to live by, but DUE TO BEING IMPERFECT MEN, they often times make mistakes, especially the leadership. He said after he's had time to look into other religions, that they all have their own set of issues, and that being in an organized religion isn't necessary, but following THE BIBLE, is necessary. He also pointed me to a friend of his that is near me to chat with a bit about stuff, and told me to keep reading and analyzing everything. This friend, used to be an elder, and is still in, but has his own doubts, and has done much research. My friend basically feels like if he had to pick one organized religion BASED ON PRINCIPLES and BIBLICAL RESEARCH, not on the faults of men, that he'd be a witness, however, he said that he's not willing to submit to men, and some of their rules, so basically he's in limbo.

  As far as being an apostate, I wouldn't even give myself that title yet. The borg would, because I don't believe everything lock, stock and barrel, and I probably never will, too much is based on "blind faith in men", IMHO. Which is really the problem that I have with most religious groups.
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  unique1

  AWESOME!!! Hope it works!!
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  Hortensia

  I'm so glad you are thinking this through so thoroughly while you are so young and can make good choices for your life. The other posters are right about feeding info to your family very slowly. What worked for my family was seeing me happy and successful in spite of what the watchtower said would happen to apostates. I didn't say much until each of my sisters was in a situation where they were treated unjustly by the elders, and then I struck while the iron was hot. Now my whole family is out of the org.
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  joannadandy

  Very cool Blues. It has to be exciting to have someone you can bounce ideas off of. It's tremendously helpful to have someone close to you who knows the in's and out's who you can be honest and frank with about what you're finding out and piecing together for yourself.

  Honestly tho, I'm curious why the need to get the family out?