When you were a dub, did you shun DF/DA'd people?

by exwitless 26 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  exwitless

  Actually, in my 14 years as a dub, it only came up with one person in our cong. who got pregnant out of wedlock (and used drugs during pregnancy). She was DF'd but still came to most meetings. Of course, we all did the 'avert your eyes when she walks by' thing. But other than her, I never actually had to shun someone publicly.

  My supervisor at work has been witness to my being shunned, since I DA'd. She has asked me a couple of times if I ever had to do that when I was an active JW. Then she asked if Iwould have done that if I was in that position. I'm embarrassed to say, yeah, probably being a good JW, I would've. But I would've first tried to avoid having that person see me at all so I didn't get put in that situation.

  Did you ever shun someone as a dub, and how did you / do you feel about it?
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  golf2

  NOPE !!!!!
  
  
  Golf
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  keyser soze

  I would do so only at the kingdom hall, and only because others were watching. I never agreed with it, even when I was a hardcore dub and still believed it was the truth. I could never bring myself to shun a person who had never done anything bad to me. I always felt sorry for the DF'd ones at the hall. I remember when my father merely nodded hello to a friend of his who was DF'd, he was counseled by an elder. I always thought it was a dehumanizing way to treat people.
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  Twitch

  Yea, I shunned people as a dub.

  Now i shun dubs, for the most part.

  Not much has changed really,......lol
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  mrsjones5

  I hated shunning but when I would see a df'd person I wouldn't run or hide but I would look them in the eye and smile at them. Hopefully they knew that I had empathy for them. Still made me feel crappy
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  bigdreaux

  same response as keyser. only when dubs were looking. i feel like crapt for that.
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  Sarah Smiles

  Yes, I am sorry to say I shunned a very good friend of the family, Sharon Winfrey. I was taught to smile at the person and greet them with love when they got reinstated. It was like what ever happen was over and done.

  Now, that I went through the process, some people take it too far! They would hide their children's eyes so as not to look at me. I found them very harsh. As far as forgiving, I do not think I ever forgot when a J.W. was Dfd.
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  Sarah Smiles

  Yes, I am sorry to say I shunned a very good friend of the family, Sharon Winfrey. I was taught to smile at the person and greet them with love when they got reinstated. It was like what ever happen was over and done.

  Now, that I went through the process, some people take it too far! They would hide their children's eyes so as not to look at me. I found them very harsh. As far as forgiving, I do not think I ever forgot when a J.W. was Dfd.
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  justhuman

  Basically no. I was always finding WT's policy unbibblical
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  Watkins

  Once. It was actually two times in one - my first and last. It felt awful and I was ashamed afterwards. In hindsight though, it was a key point in my exit when I realised I'd never be a good JW, 'cause I vowed never ever to do that again. Wasn't long after that episode, when I'd been absent from the meetings for a couple of months, that I got it back - saw a dub sister at the grocery store with her 2 kids - they all looked through me like I wasn't there. It made me mad... then I realised they were just doing the good JW thing - fear. When in doubt about someone's "standing in the congregation", it's better to shun without question or hesitation than to later find out that you spoke to, and maybe even smiled at, someone that Jehovah "hates" - yikes! That would make Jehovah sad. Yeah right.

  No, I really mean - that just ain't right.

  Watkins