a card I received that reallly upset me

by quietlyleaving 24 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  quietlyleaving

  A couple fo days ago two witnesses knocked with their children, they gave me flowers and a card with the following message:

  "We want you know that we love you, and that you are in our prayers..we are thinking about you.

  We remember too, and are grateful for yur support in the past, especially 6 years ago, when you came to the home, following our loss of Dennis (not his real name).

  In these last days, life is harder then ever. Satan is trying to break all of us, be it through health problems, the ones we love and even our brothers and sisters where it hurts the most. Jehovah wants us all to succeed amid our trials, and he always provides the answer. 1cor10:13. As long as we keep firm in mind that Jehovah loves us, He will strengthen us and he will never leave us.

  We may feel, why has Jehovah allowed us to suffer in this way? But he allowed Jesus to suffer until death and has now been rewarded. Remember our reward is soon to come.

  So we urge you, as a family, to continue within your circumstances, to praise Jehovah and give him glory, so we can embrace you, and cry out joyfully together, that we've made it into Jehovah's New World. Our deliverance is so very near!! Romans 8:38,39"

  The part that saddens me is that Dennis, mentioned above, was in a disfellowshipped state when he died at the age of 27. I especially remember the day he came to our home in tears at the age of 14 with a swollen lip and a black eye that his JW dad had given him.

  I ask myself what is life going to like for this couple's 4 children.

  qtlg
• 

  sass_my_frass

  Ouch that's harsh. Not sure what your status is, but you could reply with:

  Thanks for your card. I was thinking about you recently too.

  How could I have not supported you when Dennis died? We go way back; like that time he came to us at age 14 with the black eye and the swollen lip that his father had given him.

  You can kid yourselves with whatever delusions you want, but your hypocritical conditional friendship is worthless to me. I stopped missing you long ago.

  You are going to grow old and die. I know you KNOW I'm wrong, but by the time you realise it's true it will be too late to go back in time and have a decent life. So just don't contact me again and I'll call it even.

  Shun the shunners babe.
• 

  jgnat

  Yowch. Talk about a family in denial. How about a thank-you card like this?

  Thank you for your beautiful card and your loving thoughts.

  These days, life is better than ever. I don't worry about Satan any more (1 John 4:4), and my burdens are lifted (Matthew 11:3). We are promised that we can live in the light now, regardless of our circumstances. This I am determined to do (1 John 2:8-11).

  Again, I was very touched by your visit the other day. May you find peace as I have by walking daily with Jehovah, not fearing the future.
• 

  sass_my_frass

  Definitely go with jgnats option: but you may find that at least writing mine out and binning it will make you feel better! Screw them.
• 

  jgnat

  I thought of another scripture for good measure..... not fearing the future (Matthew 6:34).
• 

  sparrow

  I am amazed how fake (and silly) this sort of things sounds to me now. I hope you find the right response that gives you satisfaction.
• 

  purplesofa

  In these last days, life is harder then ever. Satan is trying to break all of us, be it through health problems, the ones we love and even our brothers and sisters where it hurts the most. Jehovah wants us all to succeed amid our trials, and he always provides the answer. 1cor10:13. As long as we keep firm in mind that Jehovah loves us, He will strengthen us and he will never leave us.

  We may feel, why has Jehovah allowed us to suffer in this way? But he allowed Jesus to suffer until death and has now been rewarded. Remember our reward is soon to come.

  So we urge you, as a family, to continue within your circumstances, to praise Jehovah and give him glory, so we can embrace you, and cry out joyfully together, that we've made it into Jehovah's New World. Our deliverance is so very near!! Romans 8:38,39"

  This is copied from some publication, thats a given. And I never felt like anything was genuine when it was done counting time.

  purps
• 

  WTWizard

  I have had a few cards like this when I started totally blowing off meetings. Once, they wasted about $3 on a card telling me that they were worried about me, plus another $1.29 on postage (and the time it took to write it up and mail it). They sent me three of those, usually with the Craptower magazines and the Asleep for the month, about once a month until they figured out that they were wasting their time and money.

  This is the main reason I didn't disassociate yet. I figure that, at $5 per mailing, that ought to add up pretty quickly. They ended up wasting $15 in money, plus lost time in shopping for the items, the time to write it up and mail it, and worrying if I was OK. Not once did I answer them--I can only hope they are still wasting their time and energy worrying. I will let that go as long as it can--and if they ever do hold a judicial hearing for me, I will let them waste more time and gas to hold it while I blow that off too.
• 

  quietlyleaving

  thanks for your advice everyone

  Jignat I think I will write them a card, along the lines of what you suggested.

  Sass - I'm fading, my husband is an elder in the cong. The family that visited are from a neighbouring congregation. I'm becoming famous lol. But reading your suggestion made me feel better. I wasn't quite seeing the 'ouchness' of the tone until you mentioned it and now I can see it clearly. So much for dissonance.

  I felt good that I didn't invite them in although looking at the children I almost did. I knew what I'd be in for.

  Wtwizard - yeah

  purps - it does have a copied feel to it, but then they've got this rubbish churning over and over through the publications it just spills out word for word
• 

  unique1

  I am so sorry this happened. They love us in their own jacked up way and that is their way of attempting to show it. Again it is a very jacked up way to do it. Just look it as "well it is nice to know they care about me" as opposed to a jab. It is just the way that mental people show affection.