What if you're missing the purpose? (page 8)

changeling

I honestly have not felt a flip side. Maybe it's all too new to me still...

bigdreaux

i'd rather feel alone and disconnected,than controlled.

cognizant dissident

I agree Bigdreaux. Don't get me wrong. I have no intention of ever going back. How could any of us? We cannot "unknow" what we "know".

The journey out of delusion is definitely a worthwhile one. I was just acknowledging that sometimes it is also a more difficult one, and a lonelier one. When I told my father, the PO, that I wasn't a witness anymore, he told me I was choosing the easy way out. I nearly burst out laughing. No, thinking for yourself and figuring out the meaning of your own life, and going against everyone you ever knew and loved, that is the hard way, not the easy way. But still, definitely worth it!

Cog

journey-on

If you read some of the scriptures through the eyes of this type of philosophical discussion rather than a religious one, the book of Ecclesiastes is all about the Vanity of Life.

More like I see clearly and calmly and realize that the end of the game is the same no matter how we play it, so what's the point in worrying about anything or even caring about anything overly much?

I used to think that book of the Bible was depressing because that's exactly what it sounds like: Why worry about anything? Why strive for anything? It's all a vain attempt. But, when I reread it through new eyes, it's so much deeper spiritually than how my religious upbringing presented it. When you strip away religious dogma, the scriptures have a new level to them. You don't even have to believe in God to get it.

bigdreaux

cognizant, keep up the good fight brother.

journey-on

Cog

The journey out of delusion is definitely a worthwhile one. I was just acknowledging that sometimes it is also a more difficult one, and a lonelier one. When I told my father, the PO, that I wasn't a witness anymore, he told me I was choosing the easy way out. I nearly burst out laughing. No, thinking for yourself and figuring out the meaning of your own life, and going against everyone you ever knew and loved, that is the hard way, not the easy way. But still, definitely worth it!

This is something known as The Dark Night of the Soul. It happens to most all spiritual seekers at some point.

JamesThomas

Dear Cog, I too am enjoying your posts very much. You are expressing yourself eloquently. I was going to say this earlier but the thought skittered away from me.

I still often have these feelings of futility and existential angst.

It has been my experience that the universe expresses infinitely in form and rhythm; and the human psych is no different: good days, bad days, mediocre days....and sometimes long stretches of down days.

I have only found unconditional peace when I let it all be, and not identify with disturbance and disquiet as what I am.

Perhaps this is not so much about manipulating anything, as it is simply about quietly and gently discovering what we truly are...no matter how the universe, body and mind manifest.

j

cognizant dissident

Ahh James! My kindred spirit. If I ever meet you in person, you know I'm going to propose don't you?

It has been my experience that the universe expresses infinitely in form and rhythm; and the human psych is no different: good days, bad days, mediocre days....and sometimes long stretches of down days.

I have only found unconditional peace when I let it all be, and not identify with disturbance and disquiet as what I am.

As usual, you are both wise and positive. I am learning the truth of what you say. Down days, pissy moods, they all pass in their own time, just like the good moods. No need to try too hard to hurry them on, that only seems to make them last longer doesn't it? I just left my computer for a while to go for a walk after a summer rain. My negative mood has already improved a little. Being in nature does bring calm and tranquility and understanding that we don't really have any choice but to just "let it all be" because it will "be" whether we let it or not!

I think that my body and mind are just adjusting to the lack of adrenaline and sense of urgency I learned as a JW. After all, if the sky is not falling, how do we motivate ourselves? I'm trying to live without coffee, stimulants, anti-depressants or any mood altering substances whatsoever. Just let the moods and emotions ebb and flow naturally. It's really amazing how flat everything seems for a while. Some days, I think, "this is reality? It really sucks! or it is really boring!" Then I get interested in something and it passes. Yes, no need to take it all so seriously as if my temporary mood is who I am.

Cog

cognizant dissident

keep up the good fight brother.

OK, I will, but just for the record, I am a "sister" not a "brother"!

Cog

cognizant dissident

This is something known as The Dark Night of the Soul. It happens to most all spiritual seekers at some point.

What, only one night? My soul seems to have many dark nights. But thanks Journey-on, I realize what you are saying. We are really not alone in this journey. It just feels like it sometimes.

Also, I agree with what you said in your last post. Even though I am an atheist and don't believe the Bible is the Word of God, that does not mean that there is no wisdom to be found between it's pages. Many of the Proverbs and teachings in Ecclesiastes contain wisdom as do some of the teachings of Jesus. I do think that it is possible to learn from and show respect for wisdom regardless of which cultural or religious tradition it comes from. The important thing is not to lose our own sense of perception and awareness so that we become deluded by or enslaved to someone else's story.

Cog

What if you're missing the purpose?

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