Who did you say goodbye to before disassociating yourself?

by mtsgrad 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • mtsgrad
    mtsgrad

    I am thinking of disassociating myself within the next two weeks. Aarrghhh!!!

    Did you have a shortlist of people to day goodbye to?

    What were your final words.

    What were your friends final words.

    I am also looking for a humourous DA letter if anyone can help.

    Cheers JWDers.

    mtsgrad

  • Dragonlady76
    Dragonlady76

    I would worry that saying goodbye will let them in on your plans.

  • The wanderer
    The wanderer

    Dear mtsgrad:

    When I disfellowshiped the Watchtower Society I
    let my closest friends know about it through a
    letter because at the time I felt it was just
    too hard face to face.

    I would suggest to "leave the door open"
    in case one day they decide to leave
    the organization.

    Respectfully,

    Richard

  • Twitch
    Twitch

    Nobody

    The person they knew no longer existed and I suspect they thought I was dead anyways

  • Dragonlady76
    Dragonlady76
    When I disfellowshiped the Watchtower Society

    the wanderer,

    this is a great line!

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    well I have never officially DA'd... but I wasn't sure if I'd end up getting either DA'd or DF'd so I wrote emails to the people I loved the most (m mother, my friend Angie, my friend Tina and my friend Loretta) that I was taking a "break" and I also told them I had a bf who was not a witness. I didn't know if that would roll into them forcing me to DA or get DFd since according to the dubs I wasn't free to date..... That was why I picked the people I cared the most about to have a word to say before my words were taken away from me.

    I guess that is what is important. Once you DA.. then they will not be allowed to speak to you anymore.. so if there is anyone you want to have a word with first.. those are the ones you should speak with..

    how did it go for me.. a few were understanding.. the last I mentioned said I was sinful and recommended I blow my head off.. you just never know how a dub will react to news you are not going to be a dub any more.... such love I'll never forget how much her words hurt.. After her reply, i decided not to tell anyone else.

  • IP_SEC
    IP_SEC

    my mom. She dont shun me anyhow.

  • exwitless
    exwitless

    We mailed our DA letter to the KH. At the exact same time, we mailed one letter to one "sister" from the KH with whom we had a lot of contact with in the months prior to DA'ing. She had no clue what was coming, although she knew we were inactive. We sold/gave her a lot of stuff from our cleaning business, since we had just ended our business and she was just starting one. LDB also spent a lot of time with her giving her advice about the business.

    (On a side note, she subsequently got counseled by the elders for coming over to our house to talk to LDB "alone" while I, the wife, wasn't home. Give me a break! LDB is in his mid-30's and this woman is in her late 60's! What did the elders think was going to go on in my absence? Talk about control freaks!)

    Anyway, this lady was/is very nice and appreciative of our help and had talked about having us over for dinner (before she knew about our plans to DA). So we sent her a short letter explaining that we had sent our official DA letter and briefly explained why we DA'd. We also wanted her to know that we still really cared for her and our personalities and hearts had not changed because we DA'd. Also, since the elders were on her case already, we wanted her to know we would do anything we could if she needed some sort of defense against elder accusations. We've never heard from her or the elders since mailing the letters.

    I think it's good to send at least one other person in the congregation (a 'common' person, non-elder) a letter briefly explaining why you DA'd and hopefully disarm any potential rumors.

    Good luck with your DA'ing. For us, it's the best thing we could have done (besides never becoming assimilated to begin with!)

  • Dragonlady76
    Dragonlady76
    (On a side note, she subsequently got counseled by the elders for coming over to our house to talk to LDB "alone" while I, the wife, wasn't home. Give me a break! LDB is in his mid-30's and this woman is in her late 60's! What did the elders think was going to go on in my absence? Talk about control freaks!)

    They have some Sick minds!

  • drew sagan
    drew sagan

    no one

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