A Few Funny Bible Verses

by JH 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • JH
    JH

    OK, I found these on the net but I found them funny....

    http://www.boerenroem.nl/fbv/blog.html

    Daniel opening windows

    Not a litteral funny bible verse, but a funny bible joke:
    Question: Who was the first pc-user ever?
    Answer: Daniel, he opened his Windows three times a day.
    To be framed over the bathroom door...

    Jeremiah 20:9b "I am weary of holding it in--indeed i cannot."
    How you should take your coffee

    God is clear that one should drink their coffee black, no sugar, no cream:
    Isaiah 5:20 (New American Standard Bible)
    Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
    Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness;
    Who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter!
    Proverbs 27:14

    Proverbs 27:14: "He that blesseth his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it shall be counted a curse to him."
  • sparrow
    sparrow

    Jeremiah 20:9b "I am weary of holding it" - Doctor told me not to lift heavy weights...

  • Tara
    Tara

    LOL. Cute.

    sparrow, love your avatar.

  • fedorE
    fedorE

    I dont where it is but Jesus is supposed to say to his 12 ..."ok lets go have breakfast".........

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    Hope this doesn't violate the posting guidelines, but it's from the Bible, so it's probably OK.

    Jeremiah 5:8 (NWT)

    "Horses seized with sexual heat, having strong testicles, they have become.

    They neigh each one to the wife of his companion."

    My puberty-stricken son really likes that one for some reason.

    Open Mind

  • metaspy
    metaspy

    I have always liked how the NWT breaks this verse on the page:
    1 Tim. 4:8

    8 For bodily training is beneficial for a little; but


    I Think we can all agree that bodily training is good for a little butt.

  • whyizit
    whyizit

  • whyizit
    whyizit

    Oops! Hit a key I shouldn't have.

    How about the NWT version of Job 6:6?!

  • journey-on
    journey-on
    How about the NWT version of Job 6:6?!

    "....slimey juice of marshmallow???"

    What did they get that translation from?

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    When you are bed with your "wife/girlfriend/mistress/secretary" "She must be made pregnant with semen"

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