Suddenly and inexplicably enraged

katiekitten

My mum showed me this e-mail her JW friend had sent her last week.

In it the friend explained how wonderful the magazines are and how they provide food at the proper time because they had recently had an article in about ' Being Prepared for the Unexpected'. The article had told them to have a bag packed with emergency stuff in case they ever needed to Leave the House in a Hurry. So they were told to pack dried food, a wallet with important documents in, waterproof clothing etc.

Now this, it seems, was pretty relevant because I live in Gloucester where were had terrible floods a few weeks ago, and some peoples houses were flooded out, the entire city had its water cut off for a fortnight because the pumping station flooded, and most work places were unable to allow staff in because they were not able to provide flushing toilets or running water.

So my mims friend was totally blown away by how Jehovah is so clever - although having dried food and your passport in a waterproof wallet did nothing to help you flush the toilet for a fortnight.

But - now heres to point of this long and rambling story - I suddenly got super angry about this article and its survivialist mentalilty. I got so mad that in the end I had to stop talking because I was picking a ridiculous argument with my mum about it, and I just sat in a sulk with tears rolling down my face in that 'im not really crying' style.

So why was I so angry. I dont know really. What I told my mum kind of makes sense but it doesnt really explain this sudden explosion of emotion. I said I hated being a JW kid in the 70's, because we were brought up on a diet of war stories about persecution and surviving it. We were always stashing food in the attic, making cloth toys stuffed with dried beans so there;d be something to eat when they came to persecute us. The year book was always full of stories about bycicle spokes being pushed through brothers legs and their toe nails being pulled off with plyers, and the implication was that as gods people we would definately be targetted for this kind of thing. The sisters in the cong were always yabbing on about how Jehovah stopped the pain before you passed out.

As a kid I was told to pray for the brothers in Malawi every night. I know that stuff that happened to them was terrible, but no-one stopped to tell a 7 yr old kid that it was unlikely such governmental brutality would ever happen in a first world country with a developed legal system of human rights. I just thought it was completely inevitable that all that stuff would happen to me, it was just a case of when, not if.

Imagine bringing a child up with that?

The funny thing was, as I was ranting on about all this, my 9 yr old daughter was sat listening and my mum said "Shhh, Chloe will hear!" So I went off again BOOM!!!!! "I shouted "WHAT, SO ITS OK TO FILL MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD WITH ALL THAT, BUT CHLOES NOT ALLOWED TO HEAR ONE CONVERSATION ABOUT IT"

Honestly!

ex-nj-jw

(((((((((((((((((((((katiekitten)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

You just had a meltdown, it's gonna be ok!

nj

Dragonlady76

I feel for you, it really boggles my mind at how insensetive they can be.

greendawn

It's the frustration of having had a terrible childhood with what amounted to propaganda that created a lot of negative psychological complexes that blight one's life, the martyr complex and the god complex (fearing god), and all for the sake of an org that lacks real love and sincerity for its members.

It's the anger of having got duped and exploited for many years in the past by some half baked religious leaders.

unique1

Well you should tell your mom the Government is obviously the FDS dispensing food at the proper time because they came up with this info first. The WTBS probably pretty much just copied it.

http://www.ready.gov/america/getakit/index.html

katiekitten

My god, Unique! Thats so cheeky, theyve just straight copied it. Food at the Proper time, My Arse!

rebel8

Multiple choice:

(a) It's the pregnancy wreaking havoc on your emotions

(b) It's a valid reaction to a parent who brainwashed you into being afraid for your very life when there really was nothing to fear (some time Google "white night Jonestown")

(c) It's a valid reaction to the idiotic tendency of dubs to pretend like they originated every single good idea (when emergency preparedness has been well-known way before the Awake University professors wrote about plastic bags and dried food)

(d) It's a valid reaction to the idiotic tendency of dubs to credit jehoopla only with positive events and never credit him with the bad stuff (he lets floods happen & that is somehow cancelled out by his brilliant suggestion to put your documents in plastic bags--If jehoopla was a politician, he'd never get re-elected!)

(e) all of the above

changeling

When I was growing up, not only was my mother in fear of the demons, but of earthquakes as well.

There was a period of time when I was about 10-11 years old when she would pack herslf a paper bag with a change of clothing and a few emergency items, and place it by her bed "just in case". She taught me to do the same.

So, I completely understand your frustration at the crazyness of this mentality.

It's a wonder any of us are still have way sane.

changeling

kitten whiskers

((KatieKitten))
Oh sweetie! I remember growing up then! I too was so scared and scarred! I remember the letter writing campaign and all the talk of the adults while your little ears heard things that made your eyes pop out of your head with fright!
Isn't it nice knowing we're not warping our kids with that fear? I come with a natural paranoia gene, this didn't help. LOL!
I must say, you were very creative to hide beans in your stuffed toys! A child should never have to live in fear like that. I am so sorry. I don't blame you one bit for being angry! The Society feeds paranoia and creates it. No doubt you were thinking of all the new little ones that were going to have overboard parents that scare the living daylights out of them. A flashback on your anxiety too.
Kitten Whiskers

Crumpet

Its funny how these things can come upon us at the least expected moments. I think it was good that you cried and your response to your mother's ludicrousness was spot on. Why was it alright for you to be put through mental toture of horror stories about the future and its not alright for Chloe to know about it?

Big hugs darlin'. I imagine its an emotional time anyway. But how lucky for Chloe and baby kitten not to have to endure any of this!

Suddenly and inexplicably enraged

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