JW's are able to give gifts anytime, not just holidays, BUT DO THEY?

by OnTheWayOut 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    On a thread I started awhile back, the following was in the initial post:

    Otherwise, the wife recently purchased some fancy gifts for her family members. As she was getting them
    ready to send home, I asked her how her DF'ed sibling would feel being left out. The wife said she included
    the same type of gift for that sibling as for the other family members. I WAS IMPRESSED that she was
    able to send a gift to the sibling she chooses to shun. WOW.

    Okay, you all commented on the giving to a DF'ed family member already. Now a different
    twist on this.

    I gathered some gifts for some of my family members following the wife's example. I was able to tell the wife:
    "You say that you will give gifts at anytime of the year. Other Witnesses will say that, but in reality, most of
    them never really give any gifts to anyone except maybe their children and their spouses."

    She cited an example of one of her friends that does give gifts. I acknowledged that friend. I went on to say that
    "Other than the rare Witness, such as [my wife and her one friend], the vast majority NEVER go beyond spouses
    and children. Some give a gift to their mother shortly before or after Mother's Day to make her feel 'not left out'
    but even that is rare. Most who give a gift to their children offer it as a substitue for a Christmas or birthday gift."

    The wife, in rare form, agreed. She said "We can't just say it, we have to do it. It's a shame that many don't do it."

    COMMENTS? How many know of JW's saying such statements as "We don't need a holiday to give a gift." but
    rarely, IF EVER, actually give gifts?

  • Bumble Bee
    Bumble Bee

    I don't ever remember getting a gift "just because" from anyone in the borg, including my inlaws (they don't even give anniversary gifts or cards).

    BB

  • yucca
    yucca

    I remember a lady who drove to the hall with her car loaded with wrapped christmas presents all over the back seat. She was on her way to visit her family for Christmas and she never got into trouble over it. Very puzzling I thought at the time.

  • dobbie
    dobbie

    no apart from a friend who would sometimes buy the kids something, hubbys mother never bought them anything. We used to have a present day for our two and sis in laws two as our anniversaries were 2 days apart, we gave each other something too. This year though cos i'm d'ad i guess they got the kids present each but didn't even give us a card, so we just gave the kids a present back and i gave them a card to try to make them feel guilty lol!

  • 4digitcode
    4digitcode

    totally agree.they never do and i rarely did. only when i came back from trips from abroad. Once i brought back gifts for the most random people in the hall just because i had seen it and it made me think of them in particular...and i didn't bring anything back for some closer friends on one trip but i would on others. well anyway it was a bit awkward. A trendy sister at the hall used to pass down all her last season clothes to teenage sisters myself included and it could have been nice of her because we didn't have money but still wanted to look nice but the other side of the coin was that she and some sisters her age made a show of their cool clothes and then when you would wear the clothes she gave you in front of others she would say OH I KNEW MY SKIRT WOULD LOOK GREAT ON YOU....or NO NO NO THAT4S NOT HOW YOU WEAR IT I SHOULD HAVE KEPT IT or some stupid thing like that. what she doesn't know is most of the stuff we had to throw away anyway because we didn't want to tell her it was too big for us. i'm sure that would have shut her up. sad.

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    We gave gifts regularly to our children and spouse. We also gave gifts to worldly family members. As far as jws go, we often brought a gift when visiting at their homes.

    I'm sure we could have done better, but I really feel that giving gifts is fun.

  • Mrs. Witness
    Mrs. Witness

    I'm not JW nor never was, but my hubby and inlaws are and I have to postulate: Perhaps they're not giving gifts because they only work part time so they can pioneer? My mother-in-law gives gifts, but (and I know I sound ungrateful) they are hand-me-downs from the people she cleans for. They're nice & all, but still... My husband doesn't work, has no personal income, and so never gives gifts (unless he uses my money!! )

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    My parents favorite thing to say "you don't have to wait till christmas or birthday to get a gift", "you can get them all year". Well I'm here to tell you that we never got them at all!

    So no, I didn't feel special all year long or any other time for that matter!

    And I don't know of any JW's personally that give or get gifts for no reason. The only time I've observed gifts being given is Wedding and baby showers!

    They are full of -------T!

    nj

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    While all comments are welcome, I expect the majority to be similar to
    that of ex-nj-jw.

    Many of you may have been good gift-givers, so add this to your comments if you were:
    are you a better gift-giver after leaving the borg?

  • RollerDave
    RollerDave

    I'm with Ex-NJ-JW on this one.

    The so-called 'gift ANY time' never materialized.

    I was allowed to celebrate holidays at my Dad's until I was 'old enough to understand.'

    I remember my kindergarten teacher informing me it was my birthday that day, I hadn't even known!

    half-day KG, morning.... No little school party, but I hurried home for the party I assumed was waiting.

    Silly child, you don't GET birthdays. Now run along and play because it's perfectly safe for a five-year old to run the streets and I'm a stupid lazy bint who is too hung over to wake up just now. Your tears mean nothing, you are bad and worldly and selfish for wanting what any other kid wouldn't even have to ask for.

    Love among themselves, what a crock of $hit.

    RD

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