Jesus is bisexual according to the watchtower! (page 3)

IP_SEC

Not even drunk will I dare to insult God or Jesus in this way.

SHAME ON YOU.

They are not my gods. & I have no shame.

bigdreaux

i'm with IP_SEC, if we were making fun of Allah, you'd probably be right here doing it with us. i'm not saying you would, i'm just saying you'd probably not be so offended.

nvrgnbk

Sorry.

Someone had to do it.

If Jesus is gay, he wont care.

If Jesus isn't alive, he wont care.

If Jesus is alive, he surely knows were not talking about the real him.

Here ya go...

IP_SEC

I really have no problem with bisexual people like Jesus was. Whatevah rox yer boat is fine with me.

5go

Not even drunk will I dare to insult God or Jesus in this way.

How did I insult god I he created me TG when he could of easily made me a strait girl or a boy. Then to add insult to injury I am have to deal with being on the inside a lesbain because Though I feel like a female I do still have a attraction to women. Which actualy worked out sot of well because it make for a seeming strait but girly man.

Enough nonsence to call a ominsexual ( at least unknown sexual ) being strait is a stretch. He is at least Bi.

Sorry, if that offends your idea of God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, G_d, or Allah; but it is true he created us right. ( by the way I am extending you a platitude I don't believe he created humans I am currently an athiest and evolutionist )

JCanon

Per Jesus and the Bible being a eunuch (gay) is considered a "gift". But a gift to be used for "singleness."

But there might be something to all this as well based upon esoteric issues in Eden. You see Satan and Jesus were married in heaven. They are the two angels on the Ark of the Covenant, the only two COVERING CHERUBS (i.e. their wings covered over the Ark). They are depicted on the curtains alternatively as the churb with the face of a man (always a reference to Christ, i.e. the "son of man") and the palm tree representing Satan). Anyway.... She was truly the QUEEN OF THE HEAVENS, like a sophisticated superstar among the angels. She was extremely beautiful and talented, sort of like Scarlet O'Hara in "Gone with the Wind."

But then God created humans. Something new in the universe and perhaps a point of jealousy for Satan since Christ/Michael seemed to be so taken with mankind. This is apparent since his future eternal wife is not with another angle but people from the earth. So it goes that when Adam was created, a handsome black man, Jesus was totally enamored. Adam was alone for about 30 years before Eve was created. So I guess that was too much for Satan, and given the chance, she murdered all mankind in one fell swoop. Perhaps Satan as the "woman" as noted in Genesis 3:15 was a bit jealous on many levels. That is, that mankind could compete with her great fame and heavenly magnificence. But that's not the point. Man's simplicity was their attraction, besides God making them incredibly sexy. Soooo, I guess Jesus tended to be a bit on the "eunuch side". He is depicted as carrying the attribute of "love" and "power", the man and bull, whereas the other covering cherub (Satan) focuses on the eagle and the lion, representing wisdom and justice (i.e. knowledge and legal issues). Things broke down in Eden, Adam got a divorce and promised in marriage to 1,440,000 of mankind after all the dust settled after judgment day. Thus some of men ended up being more glorious beings in heaven than even Satan.

I think some of the movies like "Prophecy" and "Constantine" are a bit on point that some of the angels rebelled against God, at the tune of 1/3 of the angels in 1992 being kicked out of heaven with Satan, this being due to arrogance over the elevated position men would have in the universe. That kind of blind hatred just doesn't make that much sense if God wanted it, right? It's sort of like racism, where like when a black man like Tiger Woods becomes an excellent golfer in a field normally dominated by whites ends up getting death threats. WHY? It's just jealousy, some people just don't want others to have what they have.

But God is also a "jealous god" too. Maybe that's the aspects of his persona carried by the eagle and lion, the wisdom and justice side of God's persona.

Anyway, there is part of that scenario about Lilith if you want to look it up where Satan as Lillith also married to Adam ended up being jealous over this and that, etc. That could have some distorted foundation in the truth about the polemics and new affections Jesus was establishing for mankind, and perhaps particularly men especially. The ultimate unrecoverable insult for any woman, to get jilted by her husband who prefers another man.

Oh well, Jesus will get his wish at the rapture, when so many of those gorgeous men will become his wife in a composite bride of 1,440,000 persons (both men and women) from the earth. He will be one with humanity for all time. He couldn't be happier. You know, it seems practical when you think about it, that Christ's human identity at the second coming would be gay since Christ does have to marry all these men in the end. If he came back as a totally straight man, it might not be as fun. YUP, Jesus and the angels are defiitely BISEXUAL.

Google "Lilith" for more info.

JC

alt

SATAN as "Lillith" the first jealous wife of Adam....

Gretchen956

OMG just when I was enjoying a good chuckle over this thread here come the wankers. Grow a sense of humor! Ok... here are some things I DO have to pipe up on:

Not shocking really, always thought Paul was as gay as gay gets. Can we say woman hater??

You do know that we're gay because we LOVE people of our own sex and NOT because we HATE people of the other sex right? For the most part, there are exceptions. Some of my best friends are men. There's nothing wrong with it, really. I even have siblings that are men.

And JCCanon, you are just plain weird. First of all eunich does NOT equal homosexual. Where did you get that? LOL and the idea that god wants any of us to be celebate rather than who she created us to be is just pathetic.

Sherry

lesterd

Come on now!! Luke 20: 34 clears that up;

34

Jesus said to them: "The children of this system of things marry and are given in marriage, 35 but those who have been counted worthy of gaining that system of things and the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage. 36 In fact, neither can they die anymore, for they are like the angels, and they are God’s children by being children of the resurrection.

For all thier faults, yours is a wilder stretch of the imagination.

Chirst probably lost his power to self procreating, that Adam had before he had it ripped out of him to create Eve, being born of humane parents.

Cindi_67

bigdreaux:

You wrote:

i'm with IP_SEC, if we were making fun of Allah, you'd probably be right here doing it with us. i'm not saying you would, i'm just saying you'd probably not be so offended.

And I respond to you that NO, I wouldn't be here making fun of Allah either. I have learned to respect other people's religious symbols even if I don't see them as divine or gods. That is what being on the outside has taught me. Would I be offended? You are right, probably not, because I don't see Allah as MY God. But out of respect to the Muslims I wouldn't make fun of him just as I don't like them hating Christians because they don't believe the same way they do.

Gretchen956:

You wrote:

OMG just when I was enjoying a good chuckle over this thread here come the wankers. Grow a sense of humor!

I do have good sense of humor, but I certainly do not make fun of God and never will. I don't care about your personal lives, I certainly am not a saint & have my own preferences when it comes to intimacy, and what anybody does in their bedrooms is none of my business and don't judge them for it either, but like I said, just as nobody likes to be made fun of, whether it be because of their religion, their lifestyle, their race, etc., I felt it was disrespectful to make fun of God and Jesus, even if you don't believe they exist.

I really don't want to turn this into a cyber fight, because in general I do agree and respect the reasons why so many of us are either angry and upset about their experiences as JW, I have my own monsters, but I felt I had to say something. Let's just bury the hatchet and go on.

greendawn

Jesus being the bride groom of the church does not imply any sexual activity at the physical level but rather at the the mysterious and incomprehensible to us spiritual body level, whatever a spiritual body is like. The church members will be given spiritual bodies and reside in heaven.

As for Paul being a woman hater that is far fetched and based on selective quoting. Though he did consider man to be the head of woman he advised men to be sensitive and kind to their wives for fear of suffering divine censure, this headship was not to be abused.

The degradation of women is a speciality of Islam which even advises men to see sex as an ego boosting act of domination over woman rather than an act of mutual love and affection.

Jesus is bisexual according to the watchtower!

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