Missing the meeting... AGAIN

5thGeneration

Pretended to be sleeping.

Wife and kids got ready and left without me.

Wife's gonna be PISSED when she gets home.

Well at least I have football to watch.

eclipse

If she's yelling, ask her why...?

Is she more angry/embarassed about looking bad that you weren't there,

or is she more mad that she had to go by herself?

If she stops to think about why she's pissed, she might realize that she is getting upset for nothing.

5thGeneration

All of the above.

She basically gets upset dragging the kids by herself because she doesn't really want to go either.

She really hates answering for me too. "Where's your husband?" "Is he sick?" "Why haven't we seen him?"

I feel really bad for her but... watcha gonna do?

eclipse

That's why you should calmly ask her,

so that she can look inward at her own anger and see where it is coming from..

Then ask her what is more important, '

for us to ''look good'' for the brothers, or have a good heart, for jehoba'.

Jehoba knows our hearts, the brothers can't save us, only jehoba can,

so why are we so consumed by trying to look good for them?

Quandry

You are leaving your family out and making your wife do all the work. She feels undervalued and appreciated. and that you do not care about your family.

Why not try a different way?

Why not plan an outing for your family? Get tickets to something as a surprise.

Take the family on a picnic or to the zoo or some other family place.

Tell wife that everyone needs to play in the backyard today instead of going anywhere, or everyone needs to pitch in with yard work, etc.

Make a big family breakfast and let the kids help, and then serve it to mom. Tell her it's her day off.

This way dad is a hero to the kids, and your wife is happily surprised and feels you are interested in your family.

TheListener

Quandry, those are all fine ideas. But, the reality is if his wife wants to go to the meeting she will view those things as him purposely trying to subvert her faith.

There isn't a way to win in this situation.

If you go you're miserable and your wife knows it and gets pissed.

If you don't go you're happy but your wife is miserable and she gets pissed.

I think one thing you could do is give her a sentence or two that she can memorize to answer those at the KH who ask about you.

Make it something simple and memorable. Tell her you know it's dificult answering questions about someone else's situation and this simple phrase should help. Perhaps some others on the board can suggest a good short phrase.

I do not help my wife get the kids ready. If she wants to attend with them she can get them ready. I watch tv or eat breakfast or sleep; depending on how I feel that morning. It used to cause trouble but in the last 6 months things have become fairly routinized.

Good luck.

lfcviking

Well at least I have football to watch.

What game did you see then? Was it a local Mexican game, a European, South American?

G Money

Pumas v Tecos?

OnTheWayOut

"Where's your husband, 5th Generation?"

"He's not going to be here today."

It really is that simple for her.

"Why isn't he here?"

"That would be up to him to tell you. Feel free to call him."

When she comes home pissed- cook dinner for her. Tell her she could
have left the kids with you. Just say she should have stayed home with you.

I know you cannot eliminate her anger with these solutions, but what ya gunna do?

steve2

Bad-tempered women who drag their unwilling children off to a religious service whilst their husbands sleep in are a dime a dozen.

These women proliferate in all sorts of Christian religions. My next door negihbours are evangelical Baptists. Same story most Sundays: She rounds up the kids just before ten, with husband no where in sight, and noisily blasts the SUV down the road a couple of kms to their sleep little church.

However, every few weeks, she leaves the house well before ten in the morning with a spring in her step because bleary-eyed husband accompanies her. I swear she's on a high all day long. But next Sunday, it'll be back to her usual fuming self.

Missing the meeting... AGAIN

Share this