by OnTheWayOut 40 Replies latest jw friends
She hates
driving long distances by herself. This affair is way out in the boondocks. If I went, we would
go together, and I could not cut on her.
Thats lovely, I can't imagine someone doing that for me. Maybe, someday.
I would not ordinarily post a VOTE, but I believe the love and support of a spouse is tops
purps
Stick with your wife. If the dubs give you the cold shoulder maybe she will take offense for you. If not she will love you for coming with her even though she must know you would rather not. Make a united front against the busybodies who are watching for any sign of weakness between you.
You are a good man.
Bobbi
I encourage ones to 'fade' if they can especially when they have wife/husband still there & other relatives,,tho I realize it would challenging, not easy at all. Compromise if part of a relationship at times. This is just to a party, not something asking your devotion after all. I now remember a wonderful likeable man years ago,,he had been a Bethelite even, then inactive. nice guy,,wife was always clear how nice he was, large JW families on both sides. That was confusing to us, we suspected something was bothering him, of course, we just always had hope he would be activated again. Well, just go confuse the heck out of 'em.
Well, just go confuse the heck out of 'em.
I don't want to sway the votes. Even after my careful phraseology at the beginning, I thought
I would hear many votes for avoiding the party. It seems, so far, that everyone has said
"You know what you should do" or something similar to the above.
I also believe that you all know I would post a thread about the dubs reactions, so I wonder if
anyone is just hoping to hear a good story.
OTWO,
I'm with the others on this one too. And it's NOT just because I want to hear a good story.
I'm all in favor of ex JW meetups, I've gone to several and will be going with RollerDave and his missus to one this Saturday.
But you've missed a few meetups, and it sounds like you'll get to go to the November one and you should have a great time too. I vote to go with your wife so that you won't have regrets.
My vote is go to the party with your wife.
Isn't there a scripture that says something about winning over folks without a word? I vote for going to the party with your wife. Not only do you keep the peace at home, but you keep the doors open with her friend. Also, you show the folks from your wife's congo that you love people regardless of their religion or lack of religion or change of religion, etc. Besides you the ex-jw meeting is monthly, just go next month.
LOL...that's probably why the attendance is low at the ex-jw meetup, everyone figures that they will just go next month. Seriously, go with your wife to the farewell party.
I'm running with the herd.
Go with Mrs OTWO.
You have the rest of your life to apostaparty.
Also you'll probably have some juicier stories to post after a meetup with the nutters Jehovah's people.
JWs = Good.
ex-JWs = Bad.
I can't believe that my advice, JWD poster's advice and the Watchtower are all in agreement on this!
Go hang out with the dubs.
This all falls under the "be a great husband" category, IMHO. Nurture your relationship with her and reinforce that you are there for her no matter what. You're not really a JW anymore, but you are DEFINITELY her husband. That's the message you want to send loud and clear.
Open Mind
I say go to the farewell party.
Since this person is your wife's best friend, that is enough reason to go. Addtionally, that likely means that this person was a friend to you also, and you will not see her often from here on out - if you DA or are DF'd you may never see her again.
Plan to attend the Meet-up the following month. Mark it on the calender and tell the wife that unless something crucial comes up, you have begun to establish a bit of a friend base outside the bOrg, and are going to a social gathering. [All true. It might even raise some interesting discussion.] If you enjoy the meet-up, tell her that you did, and that you might just attend a monthly get-together of this group. You could keep the XJW part out of it - though it might someday come up. You will surely meet some people there that share some interests with you, and can begin to grow away more and more from the Jw scene.
Both have merit. You obviously love your wife. Show it on this occasion. Perhaps letting her know later that you attended, not begrudgingly, but at the sacrifice of another social event. I would not tell her beforehand - you don't want to send the signal that she drug you to an event in which you had no interest.
Just my 2 cents.
Jeff
