by zennin 20 Replies latest jw friends
Welcome zennin!
You do not have to agree to the shepherding call. You can tell them you are busy preparing for your mothers visit, work is keeping you busy, you are not feeling well, you get the picture. You do not have to tell them anything you don't want to, or don't feel comfortable in sharing.
Expressing your doubts may not get you DF'd right away, but you will be on their "radar", and they'll want to talk to you more.
BB
www.whydoesgodhateamputees.com/
Pulling away is not easy and will be different for every individual.
For some they just write a DA letter and go on with their lives, for others they will have to do a fade so they don't get DF
and lose all their family members. It's been over a year for me,finally stopped going to meetings and service and trying to start a new life, new friends and so on.
Take your time and eventually you'll know what's best for you and how to pull away from the watchtower and live a happier life.
Welcome to the board
After 28 years in a miserable marriage, I realized that staying had not been for the best for me, or my now ex-husband, or my 2 kids. I had suffered needlessly trying to keep to the teachings of the Watchtower. I decided that if Jehovah was going to destroy me at the "Big A" for choosing happiness in my life, so be it. But I really couldn't imagine it and was not going to worry about it. I left the marriage, found a wonderfull guy and have been happy for 8 years.
Zenin, welcome to the board. I also started to have serious doubts while in a foreign country where I went to pioneer. Once you get out of the JW bubble, its amazing how you begin to see the whole JW thing for what it really is...just another religion. Best wishes in your journey!
I think you should just "play the game" for now. You got too much on your plate to start to make waves.
Stick around, read posts and do more research for now.
After your Mom leaves, pick up a copy of "Crisis of Conscience" by Ray Franz. Reading that will convince you that the Governing Body is not the Faithful and Discreet Slave, and God is not directing the Watchtower Org.
You don't want your Mom to find that book in your apartment, do you.
Hubert
Let me see,
How did I break away? That is a very good question. As far as I can tell, it happened when my clinically depressed SO and I went to the elders begging for help and spiritual support in our time of "weakness" and were basically told to kiss off.
My SO is gender disphoric, meaning he feels like a woman trapped in a man's body. He was suicidally depressed and after struggling over a loaded gun with him the last time (this was many years ago), we decided that we would ask them for help. They told me to leave him and that they would do nothing to help him. We never went back.
Now that is not to say that we were free of the feelings that had been drummed into us for the previous 20 years of our lives, as we were both raised as witnesses. It took me many years to feel free enough to live my own life.
I am very happy to say that we are still together. I could never leave the person that I vowed to love until death because they have a problem that they have no control over. We are happier than we have ever been and are both glad that we left that organization. Needless to say, they never even tried to call on us either to see how we were doing, and strangely enough, after the pressure was off of him spiritually, his depression went away. Interesting, isn't it.
Hello and WELCOME, Zenin!!!
And TribalGirl... hugs to you... that's one hell of a story... but their attitude and lack of any offers whatsoever to help are not surprising in the least.
Love,
Baba.
Welcome Zenin
I knew in my heart that it wasn't right. I left home at 18, stopped going to meetings and starting doing the things I wanted to.
No regrets.
How did I break away ? I saw the elders were trying to be unjust towards me , giving me counsel which was not in harmony with the societies direction , so after my meeting with them I went to my seat before the Thursday night meeting , picked my bookbag up, walked out the door of the kingdom hall , and never went back. Cold turkey. It was just the straw that broke the camels back for me. Only you will know when the straw has broke your camels back. You will feel it, and you will feel secure in your decision. But only you know when that time will come. Please feel free to post here or if you ever want to talk, please feel free to pm me, would be happy to help. Good luck in your decision making process
They promised to integrate me with the opposite sex at the outset while I was studying, and then they blatantly broke that promise. Each time, they would tell me that I needed to be patient (while watching the sisters having trouble and leaving). Ultimately I realized that they were not going to keep their promises, and so I started blowing off meetings and field circus.
