by 5thGeneration 15 Replies latest jw friends
My Babe (wife's approved nickname) finally vented today because it was her birthday, which we couldn't acknowledge, and she feels really emotional that she never had a chance at a real career, may have wasted her life, etc...
She may be coming around a bit but now this is REALLY uncharted territory!
Ironically I'm getting through to her but it's scaring the bajeebers out of me now!
Maybe you could make a card for her. Something along the lines of being thankful that she was born on this particular day xx years ago and therefore you were able to make her a part of her life.
As long as you don't use the words happy birthday, then maybe it will be enough to make her feel good, but won't be overstepping her wt trained conscience.
OK....exciting times....
This is the hard part, in my opinion. You want to say SO MUCH, however, in this hillbilly's opinion: now is the time to listen and just be cool. "It" is comming together in her time and her time does NOT need to be rushed. The crack is in the dam.....let that little stream start flowing.....it will widen and widen till the whole damn dam splits in two.
Best wishes,
Stay calm...it is happening...
V PS: I want to see the other posts on this.....
5G,
Who knows if your wife's thinking will continue to open up?
Any change is stressful, even good ones, for a while. But it gets better.
Don't be afraid of it. Tell her it's okay and to let it out when she vents like that. She's probably so out of touch with those feelings herself, that is scares her, too! Cool!
I did send her a happy birthday e-card today.
Hang in there, it can be a bumpy road but its a journey worth taking. My wife was a second generation witness, took me over a year of gentle persuasion and logical reasoning but she got there in the end. Some times the anger can be directed at you for revealing it, once she knows there is no going back, that can be hard to take.
All the best.
Hang in there 5thgen. Good that you sent her the card. Do something special for her to acknowledge her "day". Your love and support is the most important thing right now. Let her vent, make sure she knows she can confide in you.
BB
here my idea...
start out small..like slip a miniture birthday card into her pocket or something.
lisa
