Wife abuse

by purplesofa 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • AWAKE&WATCHING
    AWAKE&WATCHING

    Leslie - I watched my mom get beaten by my dad, and I was beaten by my dad on a regular basis.

    I thought it would never happen to me. It did. My first husband put me in the hospital.

    My current husband, the one I just left, was verbally abusive. He tried to intimidate me by pushing and backing me against the wall a few times. The last time I called 911, when the cops came, I told them a big lie and they left knowing that I lied.

    It pissed him off but it scared him enough that he never did it again.

    I am so glad to be out of there.

    Your story is one I know well, I'm proud of you for being strong enough to post it.

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    From what i have witnessed it is a HUGE problem in the org. As children, women are silenced b/c it is a male run org. women are to be silent and if they say anything or leave their husband, well, the word Jezebel gets thrown about quite a lot.

    I have always thought a lot of the elders and MS are just arseholes with titles.

    ((((hugs))) to you Purps and anyone who has suffered in silence.

  • eclipse
    eclipse

    ((((Leslie))))

    Words escape how I am feeling right now,

    a mixture of anger, sadness but immense pride and admiration

    for a woman that deserves all the happiness in the world.

  • changeling
    changeling

    Dear Leslie: I am so sorry for the abuse you suffered, but I am very proud of you for standing up for yourself and turning the situation around.

    I am very sensitive to this issue. As a witness I saw many incidences of spousal abuse: mental, emotional, economic and physical. One particular friend, my husband and I stood by when no one else would. Today she is DF'd and her husband is well respected in the congregation.

    Additionally, I lost a friend from work last year. Her husband beat ther with a baseball bat and then shot her eight times. When she was dead, he shot himself.

    As you mentioned, this problem trancends all barriers: racial, economic, eduactional... It is a pervasive problem in our society.

    It is up to all of us to face this problem head on: to be aware that there is a problem, to report abuse, to befriend a victim.

    As parents we need to raise our daughters to have self respect and never allow anyone to cross certain lines.

    We need to teach our sons to be gentelmen and to face conflict peacefully and rationally.

    And we all need to set an example by the way we live our lives and the way he handle stress.

    I'm so glad you posted your experience, it's an inspiration to us all.

    changeling

  • delilah
    delilah

    Leslie....I'm so sorry you endured this. I cannot believe your mom said that to you. Mothers are supposed to be nurturing and caring and loving. Protective of their children, no matter their age. You said,

    My daughter would beat the shit out of a man, spit him out and serve him up to the devil if they touched her. She knows and will not live or tolerate it.

    AMEN!!!!! Good for you! I'm proud of you for teaching your daughter to look after herself. I'm also glad your eldest son got help, that's half the battle.

    Hugs to you Leslie.

  • llbh
    llbh

    Hi ps i very sad to read your story though not suprised it is probably more common than people think

    The wtbs they want to control people. is run by men who are think at best latent misogynists. Hence thier feudal attitude toward them and then exclusively men counsel women on abuse!

    sadness llbh

  • Marie_purps
    Marie_purps

    This is Leslie's daughter:

    I am so grateful that my mother taught me to stick up for myself and believe in myself, if someone is mean to me that I don't deserve to be treated that way just to have someone in my life. I rather be by myself and be happy, than be with someone and be miserable. Nobody deserves to be treated that way. I feel like, because of the way my mom raised me, my daughter won't believe that, she won't think that is normal or acceptable. Alot of girls think that is the way its supposed to be. That they cannot do any better. I know I can do better.

    My mother did not force any beliefs on me, I love my Mom and the way she raised me.

    Jessica

  • changeling
    changeling

    Welcome Jessica!

    It's wonderful to see you here!

    How are you feeling? How's the pregnancy?

    changeling

  • aligot ripounsous
    aligot ripounsous

    That's utterly despicable, coming from a man toward a woman and I feel a lot of compassion for you, Purps, let alone the fact that I find you write very well, but I believe that some people have violence in themselves. I've kept telling my son that a boy must NEVER beat a girl,and it turns out that my daughter is the violent element in the family. So, what's to be done ?

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    Jessica

    those are beautiful words . when a mother or father works so hard and their children become adults with strong self esteem-- it is a wonderful thing.

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