I shunned a JW today...

by zeroday 15 Replies latest jw friends

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  zeroday

  Does it really help to return the hurt?

  For me YES these people have destroyed my life. It is not helpful to me I know but right now I want to hurt them even if in a small way.
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  lovelylil

  I only reverse-shun the haughty JW's who stare at me UNTIL I return their gaze. They are just trying to get me to look so they can shun me first. That is why I give them the reaction I do. After all, why should I feel ashamed?, I did nothing at all wrong. That is the way I see it.

  There is one elderly lady from my old hall who when she sees me, practically falls over her own feet to get out of my way. She looks terrified that I may say something to her. So I let her go without shunning her. She is a sweet elderly woman. I don't want to add more to her grief.

  Again, I only do it to the self-righteous ones. And do I feel good about it? No...........I feel GREAT! Lilly
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  LoverOfTruth

  I personally couldn't shun a JW because maybe they're ready to jump ship.
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  oompa

  BlueVice: Does it really help to return the hurt?

  That is not what is happening Blue IMO. The dub unfortunately will feel more selfrighteous and superior. Unless of course they are wanting to join you. So it may be best to at least say to some

  Get a life! and really live.......oompa
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  JWdaughter

  I won't shun and the reason is this: I didn't do anything wrong. They expect me to respect their religious dictates. No, I don't. They expect me to be some horrible creature (since I am no longer one of them). Well, I am NOT, I am pretty much wonderful, and they should be proud that I am willing to be their associate in humanity.

  So, if I am shunned by them, first of all, I have to acknowledge it-do I act embarrassed for their discomfort? No. I won't. I will challenge it-I won't accept shabby treatment without a reasonable cause (I don't owe these people money, for crying out loud! and I didn't kill their cat, or forget to return the ladder). Next time someone tries, I will ask them why they are treating me like that. In a normal tone of voice, and conversationally. They are not going to walk away like I am an ant they happened to step on. They are going to have to at least THINK for a minute what I ever did to make them think it was necessary to biblically shun me. I may refer them to scripture, but I don't think it would need to go that far. Just making them THINK---we all have consciences. We all know that some of the WT rules and regulations struck us as insane even when we were loyal-but we did a lot of it because we were loyal.

  These people are US-a year ago, a decade ago or 30 years ago. We got over our self righteousness as JWs, and I sure as hell don't want to be a self righteous ex-JW. And I really don't want their running in to me to be a missed opportunity to open their little WT'd minds. These are mostly good people. We want them to find that goodness again. I think.

  All that being said, those are MY reasons. We all are coming from a different place, so I have to respect the reasons you do this, because I have not walked in your shoes. I have been shunned, and I don't like it either.

  Shelly
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  James Free

  Whatever makes you feel comfortable. Personally I would not shun a JW. If they do not know I DA'd myself then I get a chance to sow a seed or two of doubt. As for the ones that want to shun me, I would say Hi to them too. They look really stupid and get very uncomfortable when I don't go along with their little game.