A JW kid story (page 2)

changeling

Dear purps: Your daughter's story moved me on many levels. Having grown up a witness, I saw a little bit of myself. Having raised my daughter as a witness I saw a lot of her.

My daughter is a beautiful, intelligent, sensitive human being. I our case, I'm the bipolar one, thank goodness. But the torment my daughter experienced for being pretty and well liked was very much what you described. She was not fully at home at school or as a witness. She had a constant struggle to fit in. She did nothing that a "wordly" family would not see as simple "growing pains" but was dragged into several judicial meetings.

Today, she is married and still a witness, but she tells me all the time of her doubts and of things she sees as unjust within the org.

I am so glad your daughter is doing well. Bipolar disorder is a life long challenge, but one that can be overcome. She can indeed lead a happy, "normal" life.

Let us know how she progresses with her pregnancy and of course, when the "big day" arrives, so we can rejoice with you.

changeling

wings

The lack of understanding of behaviour from Mental illness, labelling kids rebellious and sad has terrible consequences for their developing self-esteem. They are shunned by their peers when they need help and support the most. Leaving them weak and prey to any one else that will and can exploit them.

This has been my experience, you put it so well. This is what started my fade....my grandkids ended it. I couldn't let them be exposed to the same damaging mantra of the superficial shallow JW Stepford Kids....thing...!!!

I have been raising my two granddaughters, now 2 and 4. Their mother is bi-polar, now 25. She is now living with me, and just started on meds a month ago. I have no reason to have hope, but after the road I have been down, I can't afford not to.

Mrs. Witness

Purps, Reading your story totally reminded me of Mr. Witness's story (and brought me to the verge of tears). I WISH his mother had loved him more than her religion and taken care of him as you have taken care of your daughter. My heart goes out to you both and I wish you both the best.

CHILD

I'm glad your daughter is doing well. My daughter led a double life and I knew her conscience bothered her. I also knew she really wasn't a troubled child, just a teenager wanting to be normal. Thankfully, her stepfather kept me from being very strict. Now she's 22 and is still having some trouble adjusting to college. Please continue showing her unconditional love.

Open mind

Excellent post Purps. Thank you.

I've actually thought about your daughter several times over the last few months when dealing with my oldest. Thinking of where things could end up has helped me to PUSH, PUSH, PUSH my wife to allow our kids to be more ~~worldly~~, err, normal.

So far, so good.

Thanks again,

Open Mind

sweetstuff

(((Hugs))) Purps. I'm glad you have been there for her and showed her unconditional love, no greater gift. Congrats on the upcoming bundle of joy and your daughter's improved health. You know what you said about going back to meetings, it made me think of a scripture I read in a non-NWT version, I can't remember the book or verse, its a well known one though, Fear not those who kill the body but those who kill the soul, it was translated in this particular bible as spirit, I think there is no better fitting description of the WTS, than those who kill the spirit. Of children and adults alike.

The lack of understanding of behaviour from Mental illness, labelling kids rebellious and sad has terrible consequences for their developing self-esteem. They are shunned by their peers when they need help and support the most. Leaving them weak and prey to any one else that will and can exploit them.

This part really hit home, there are five kids in my family, we have all left. Two of my siblings had ADHD and other behavioral/learning problems. They were treated like CRAP, kids in the borg are expected to be well behaved little drones, the ones who don't "fit" in the most are the ones who need the help and never get it. The effects of it on both of them, are very painfully apparent to this day. Loving brotherhood my A$$! I would rather rip out my own eyeballs with a fork than ever step foot inside a kingdumb hall again, a place that has caused more pain, heartbreak and suicide, both emotional and physical than can be counted.

dinah

Hey Purps!

Your daughter's story reminds me of me. Hooray for you for sticking my her. Your saved her life!

Being raised JW is terrible for your self-esteem. Conditional love and all that jumping through hoops is so tiresome.

I also noticed extreme jealousy among the females. If you happened to be a pretty girl, the others would peck you to death. There is stiff competition for those young brothers. It's ridiculous. From what I hear, the ones in my old congregation that are still in aren't the best husbands.

purplesofa

Welcome to the Board

mamochan13, zamora251978, wings, CHILD, and Mrs.Witness.

ronin1, I enjoyed our phone conversation today, you are a fireball.

Thank-you for the nice person that sent me a private message that is new and shy. Your words are very kind. I appreciate that.

My heart goes out to all the families that have been torn apart trying to live by the counsel we recieved, listened to and tried to impliment in raising our children.

Sadly unnecessary hardships.

Maybe someone lurking will recognize something similiar in their own situation and this will help them to love their child and not alienate them when they need a loving parent the most.

purps

WTWizard

What child is going to grow up happy and emotionally healthy when isolated from others? Being forced to not salute the flag and then having to take abuse for it is not going to help, especially if this is every day like after 9/11. No playing with other children at recess. No parties. No dating. No celebrating anything. Having to go out in field circus, often running into classmates. No vacations. Having to go to the boasting sessions three times a week, two of them past their reasonable bedtimes. No playing ("our time is for the ministry"). The beatings received during and in conjunction with boasting sessions. Pressure to get baptized starting at age 6. The horror pictures of people including babies getting destroyed combined with insistence that it will happen real soon from all respectable sources.

Is this going to result in a well-adjusted adult? I don't think so. This results in people getting depressed (everything is all the same old mush and never being good enough) and bipolar (the above combined with the fake enthusiasm from the chronic "emergency"). People are taught that everything is out to get them, and they had better stay within the sham safety of the Kingdumb Hell. Everyone outside is evil and wicked. The only safety is staying in--and then, if you don't do enough, the demons are going to get you. This is a recipe for paranoid delusions, usually of persecution but often including grandeur in cases of those who become hounders and hounder-hounders and feel themselves above common sense.

Ted Jaracz, This is YOUR fault!

ronin1

Hi purplesofa:

I truly enjoyed our conversation yesterday.

I am so glad you gave unconditional love to your daughter to help her through her troubled times.

Keep up the good parenting and also keep a relationship with your daughter. Our children need us to help them, through good and bad times.

I talk with my daughter everyday to make sure she, her boyfriend, and my two grandsons are doing well. If any problems are brewing or arise, even if I cannot physically be there for her, I can give her advice and help as needed.

Remember, if they feel they have no one in their corner to help them, they may feel there is no hope or way out. That leads to depression and other bad choices..

As always, you can give me a call at home.

Ronin1

A JW kid story

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