Disfellowshipping Experiences...

feenx

Hey all :)

So I am always curious about fellow ex dubs disfellowshipping experience. Mine was pretty retarded, well they had every reason to DF me, but the whole process was asinine. I was actually straight foreward with the elders. I felt there was no need not to be upfront about everything because I am not the type of person to hide what I've done. So the day after my fornicat-tion (Doug Heffernan voice) was done I called up my book study overseer and told him to arrange JC. While usually these proceedings can take several meetings this one did not. We talked for about 45 minutes to an hour, during which time they didn't want to get into any of my motivations or reasons for doing what I'd done (which were more than just what was on the surface), they "deliberated" for about 30 minutes and then gave me the boot. My mother told me later that my father had been told by them that after I left they all cried. mmmmm hmmmm....yes I can really see all the reasons they have to cry. Another mind to control just walked out that door. DAMN. Oh well, on to the next lamb to slaughter.

So was yours long and drawn out or short and sweet? Did you confess, or did you get caught? Were you involved in Porneia (GASP) or perhaps labeled an apostate?

solidergirl

I havent been DF yet but I'm about to be. Anyway the brothers keep asking me if my decison to join the NAVY a sure thing. I keep telling them I'm working it out. I need my time with my family. Its sad that I need their permission to spend time with my family.

ex-nj-jw

Not df'd or da'd - I simply stopped going at age 18. No drama, no meetings as far as I was (am) concerned they hold no authority over me.

nj

Gopher

Feenx -- it's amazing how you can spend years in the religion, yet in one hour it can be all over. Actually you got off easy, compared to other judicial committee experiences I've heard where the elders go deep into questioning exactly what happened, who touched who where, how far, really embarrassing stuff.

In my case there was no confession by me but my then-JW wife (whom I'm divorced from now) lied and exaggerated about me. I was an easy mark because I had gotten into small trouble before, enough to get me removed as Ministerial Servant. But really they had nothing to DF me on this time, but they didn't like me much in that hall for some reason. So they came up with "lying" as the official reason to kick me out. (I guess that's the charge they use when they have real reason to DF you.)

Whatever. They gave me my freedom, it just took me a little while to realize it. And that then-JW wife? She was soon cheating on me and DF'd herself.

maxwell

I got disfellowshipped for adultery. I confessed, said I was unrepentant and that their decision should be obvious. They dragged it out over two weeks trying to get me to come to JC's. Finally I went to meet them one Sunday and they told me their decision after 10 minutes. Big surprise!!

ex-nj-jw, I like your attitude. They have no real authority other than what an individual gives them.

solidergirl, It agree that it is sad. But you really don't need their permission. I guess what you really mean is that your family would start shunning if ordered to do so by the JW. It is sad that they will give authority to men who have no real authority.

I can associate with anyone who will allow me to associate with them. No one needs the JW permission to associate with anyone else.

feenx

Yeah don't you love those questions about sex? who touched who first, over the clothes? who went under the clothes? who took off whose clothes? why type of sex? oral? anal? condoms? did you finish? Sometimes it seems more like they're gathering info for a porn they're going to write. Maybe that's what all the elders meetings are REALLY about, hashing all the juicy details of the sex details they hear about. haha. JK. ewww.

ex-nj-jw

Yeah, the questions when I got knocked up: Who undressed who? Oral? if yes was it given or received? anal? Did you experiement with positions? The most riduculous of all was did you enjoy it? and will you do it again? In my mind I was saying hell yeah I enjoyed it and I did it several more times that why my A$$ is knocked up now!!

Stupid Elders, Stupid religion, dumb a$$ questions!

nj

grassyknoll07

It took 5 years to DF someone. The JC took about 6 months. Hearing after hearing, appeals etc. A real pain in the ... This guy knew all the rules and loop holes. He was a law student who would question decisions, arrangements etc. We finally got him on "loose conduct".

feenx

Are you saying you're proud that you finally "got him?"

grassyknoll07

It was a very long process. We tried to help him for many years. Counsel, encouragement etc. But all attempts failed. His presence caused a lot of dissent and affected the peace in the congregation. I never understood why someone would want to be part of an organization and not try to accept the standards? All his family is non-jw. Never understood this guy. Proud? No way. I do hope he is happy, because he wasn't happy in the congregation.

Disfellowshipping Experiences...

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