How Have You Gone About Making Friends Since Leaving the Witnesses ?

by flipper 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere

    This is something that I need to know, too. I'm marking it so I will find it later tonight when I can really take in the suggestions.

    I'm finding myself with a few good friends - and I really cherish them. My situation is that I was 'inactive' for 13 years and mostly kept to my self. I quit my job of 12 years, holed up in my condo for a few months until my savings ran out. I went back to work thru a temp agency and then a regular fulltime job. I had acquaintences at work but didn't allow myself to get close to anyone and ate lunch alone every day.

    I started dating someone and was shortly thereafter sticken with cancer. Coincidence?? I wasn't sure at the time.

    Seven years later I quit that job and started a whole new career with a setting that exposed me to a new set of workmates. I wanted to try to make friends with them. But I still thought I was a witness and didn't quite feel comfortable.

    I joined some online dating sites and met a few

    Then I found JWD. I reached out to an ex-witness friend and we renewed a strong friendship. I spent more time with my neighbor (of 18 years) and did a few social things with his friends (networking). I went back east to my old hometown and looked up a few old friends/acquaintences (jw and non-jw). I visited with long-neglected family (all non-jw).

    I went to a couple of meet-ups (thank you, Sandy!!) and then organized a few of my own (thank you, everyone who showed up!!).

    Work moved me and 10 others to Orange County and we do things together since we are all in the same boat (no local friends).

    In August I had tickets to a popular show down here and none of my friends were able to come down. I posted on Craigslist that I had an extra ticket. I got 18 responses!! Although I had to just select one person for the night (I'd be sitting next to a stranger anyway, right??) I've kept in contact with a few of them and now have a small group of friends in my new town.

    I bought a motorcycle and with that comes a whole new group of friends.

    I guess what this all comes down to is: be open, be available, do things. Do things you enjoy. Do new things. Be creative. Be a little cautious but not overly critical or skeptical.

  • Rosalee
    Rosalee

    AudeSapere ... I know we are polar opposites and all. Of all the folks on this site you seem the most grounded and 'nice' person. I'm sure you will end up with many 'true' friends, just by being you.

  • flipper
    flipper

    BRINJEN- Very true ! Just be yourself, and people will draw towards you to be friends !

    AUDE SAPERE- I agree with Rosalies take, you are a true extrovert who has reached out towards others to make friends ! Good for you, my friend ! It certainly is one way to not let what the witnesses did to us, defeat us or keep us down! Also I have noticed your good heart in how you stood up for what is right , like that time you spoke up for a woman being verbally assaulted on my thread by an abuser ! I really admire that, you are to be commended ! You are welcome to pm my wife and I any time ! Peace to you !

    ROSALIE- Yes indeed I agree with you about Aude Sapere, she certainly is a true friend to others ! Peace to you ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • babygirl75
    babygirl75

    This was hard for me since I only had a handful of "worldly" friend before I left at age 25. Most of my friends have been through my now husband. I work in the insurance industry so I'm always meeting new people and gaining friendships. I also coach cheerleading for our local optimist club and by being involved in my son's sports and his karate. I couldn't ask for better friends that what I have now, it is unconditional love & support from all of them!

  • primitivegenius
    primitivegenius
    get to know your bartenders/waiters/waitresses - even your checkout people at your favorite store

    heyyy that really works......... you even get free stuff or discounts lol.

    i would walk in and they automaticly bring me my 2 pitchers of iced tea and i tip em 20%..... win win situation

  • primitivegenius
    primitivegenius

    i find that if you are friendly around people they will like to be around you. i have met many friends at work, and if you have a particular hobby, and can find a good place that caters to it.......... you can meet people with your same likes and dislikes. for me its guns and knives........... so if anyone needs someone shot or cut............... jk

  • solidergirl
    solidergirl

    Most of my classmates went away to college so I'm hoping to make a lot of friends in the military. This site help me a lot I even made a couple of friendship on here. I look forward to all the people I'm about to meet.

  • flipper
    flipper

    BABYGIRL- Glad you met friends through your husband and your son's sports.

    PRIMITIVE GENIUS- Free stuff, that's good ! Make friends at work, shared hobbies, cool. Guns and knives !? Who you got a contract out on ? LOL! Governing body you say ? Ok, I'm in, sign me up. I here ya! Peace.

    SOLDIER GIRL- Glad you are making friends in the military as well as here on JWD. Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • R.Crusoe
    R.Crusoe

    There is not a single individual that I identify with in my life! Everyone is so many shades of gray different that I share no real intellectual bond with anyone! Period.

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    The way I did b4 becoming a JW. Work mates. the neighborhood. And sometimes in social situations like a lounge or bar

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