by purplesofa 26 Replies latest jw friends
The two close friends I made at the hall are out now. Maybe yours will see the real light and get out, too. You might be able to rejuvinate the friendships with them. Just takes time. Not very many stay in for long anymore. I'm sorry you are hurting.
Chenoa
Friends are important.
Let them know you care purps.
Never be afraid to show kindness and love.
If you force them to come face to face with the evil direction of the society, it may spark an awakening.
You seem like a wonderful person.
I hope you feel better soon!!
The Oracle
PS: The WT is hurting more than we realize. People (JWs) are waking up all over the place! This is going to be the best year ever for people leaving the "society's" grip. Thank God. Thank everything that is decent.
TMS
that was beautiful
thanks for sharing
purps
Hi Leslie. Needless to say, this is one of the things just about all of us here have in common. The longer we were in, the more friends we made. These relationships, which based initially on our mutual association in the organization, in some cases branched out to other areas of life. We had friendships that stretched back literally for decades. I can remember singles and couples we would stay up late at night with, drinking wine, and talking about whatever was in or on our heart. One couple we had an arrangement with every Sunday morning to get together for pastries and coffee. A few we took long vacations with overseas and felt we really bonded. Some because of our common backgrounds pre-JW. We gravitated toward the more down-to-earth folks. To see them all evaporate suddenly, especially late in life, is a most painful thing.
For myself, I felt I owed it to them to write a letter, and many others here have done the same. So I made a list of about 50 or so and wrote quite a few letters over the course of two years which I never mailed. It seemed like I could never get it right. Then when the elders started to home in for the "kill", I realized it was now or never. I felt, if I was really their friend, then I had a responsibility to discharge. I owed it to them to let them know why I wasn't coming back. But there are so many issues, the doctrines, the practices, the policies, the hypocrisies. I felt it best to select just one, and address it comprehensively. In my case, I picked the UN affair, because I felt it was the one issue that was so easy to establish the facts of, so utterly indefensible, and so absolutely hypocritical. Of course, I knew that most would read a paragraph or two and throw it in the wastebasket. But that would be their choice. They could never accuse me of withholding information that was vital to their liberty. To me, it was literally the most loving thing I could think of to do. Of course, most of them, I'm sure, viewed it as hateful.
Decide what you need to do, in order to do right by the ones you love who are still in, Leslie, and then do it. Whether it's an email, a phone call, a letter or a visit. It's not just cathartic. It's probably the right thing to do.
((((((((Leslie))))))))
PS,
I appreciate the sincere and loving post you just wrote and, for you and many others, I wish things were different.....they are not.
I have reached the conviction that all JW "friendships" are illusions: they are built on a foundation of error, half truths, mis-information,and lies. It is a foundation of sand. Anything built on this material that appears firm and substantial is an illusion. However, post exiting, when we are dealing with the real person in the real world: things can be different: friendships that are real and founded in respect, mutual conerns, and other give/take attributes of relationships that benefit ourselves and "the other."
Wishing you well as you sort all this out.....
Yours in this Journey,
V
I hear you Purps, I feel it all the time lately. Bless you chica.
I had been feeling a bit nostalgic myself, lately, until and old but current friend from the JW's called me last week and reported the following:
A couple that I was good friends with at the last Hall I attended had been engaging in running an internet porn site!!!!!!!!!!!! It hit me that most of the JW's cover up what they really are. Sad!!!!!!!
Swalker
