funny thing about being sad...especially now of all times w/ snow & NBC (page 3)

slmdf

Hey Oompa... I always love your posts. This one made me sad. I'm sorry you're going through all the emotion you are. However normal it may be, it still hurts.

When I left in June, I had to leave everything behind and start new. I just knew I couldn't do it alongside others that I knew "loved" me, yet condemned my very thought/belief system because it conflicted theirs. I just had to leave and make a new start. I moved out, and got my own place and continue to provide for myself and my new life as well as my wife, whom I left behind. She's moving on and doing well. So am I. We are growing as individuals. It's really quite nice.

My heart is with you. I can't say it'll get better, cause I've not lived through a similar experience. But know this... we do care and you are not alone.

Write anytime... and yes, I did read your entire post.

Take good care.

sweetstuff

What to do....what to do....let's see..I have 287,000 frequent flyer miles, love snow, girls in santa hats, and need to spend some time away talking with someone I could relate to.....huummmm..............oompa

LOL, I should have seen that coming I suppose. Note I said, one's who didnt' live too far, umm, I'm pretty far Oompa! But I hope it brought a smile to you, writing that.

nvrgnbk

Sorry you're feeling bad, oompa.

Vinny lives in Hawaii.

See if he can put you up for a few days.

jaguarbass

When I let the Tower, I bought a Harley. That's what a lot of men do when they have midlife Crisis.

My Adult life thanks to the Wac Tower has been 1 big midlife Crisis.

By a Harley, If it doesnt kill you, you will have fun. If it kills you, your on to your next life. Dont come back as a Witnoid.

oompa

slmdf: I just had to leave and make a new start. I moved out, and got my own place and continue to provide for myself and my new life as well as my wife, whom I left behind. She's moving on and doing well. So am I. We are growing as individuals. It's really quite nice.

Holy Yowzers Slim, that is what I felt I would have to do from the getgo. Now how long did you meditate and wait to make your departure decision? Any kids? What was your relationship like with your wife (pm me if you want)..........thanks...oompa

neverendingjourney

It sounds like you're in the middle of a post-exit depression. I went through that myself. I wasn't right for two years. It took me a long time before I was finally able to come to terms with realizing that my belief system was an illusion. The destruction of my hopes and dreams for the future was difficult to overcome. Hang in there. Things will get better. This place can be very therapeutic. JWD played a big role in helping me get things off my chest and eventually overcome my depression.

I discussed my thoughts on this topic a while back. I think there are many similarities between what I went through and what you're going through right now. I wish you all the best.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/146158/1.ashx

oompa

nvrending: I wasn't right for two years. It took me a long time before I was finally able to come to terms with realizing that my belief system was an illusion. The destruction of my hopes and dreams for the future was difficult to overcome.

I am definately going to do a thread about this and what it was like to first wake up. I really have no belief anymore....as in...I really do not know what to believe....I now even kind of wonder about death and is there anything? Who the hell knows? Of course the only honest answer to that comes from someone dead.....and they dont say much.

Sweetstuff: LOL, I should have seen that coming

Sweetstuff, I love your advice and all, but if you want me just SAY so...but put this sexy personal stuff in pms girl......oompa

slmdf

oompa -

I realized that I needed to change almost a year ago. I went to the elders because of the "wrongdoing" I had been involved in. Keep in mind, I was an elder just 6 months prior, so I still had a love for the organization. I went to the elders because I thought it was the "right" thing to do and I quickly realized I wanted out of the organization for good. Coming to that realization only took 2 months. It was VERY quick for me (thankfully!). Frankly, I wanted to be disfellowshipped because I couldn't take the emotional beating I would have gotten trying to fade. My family (especially parents) are big on being the best 'performers' in the congregation. We always had to do it better than everyone else. So, they would have been all over me, like feathers on a duck, had I tried to just fade away. I miss them terribly, but it's worth the pain of missing them so I didn't have to experience the pain of pleadings to come back. I used their own weapon against them. That feels and felt good.

I am also married (no kids). We are now separated. I made that decision 4 months after I got DF'd. My choice to leave. She still wants me back - even if I'm not a JW. She's a sweetie. But I need to move on.

Did that answer your questions? Feel free to PM me if you want more... or post here so all can read. I'm ok either way.

Keep positive... you'll be ok.

Warlock

Being in Limbo is a real bitch.

I know.

Warlock

dinah

Oompa,

You came to the right place. Most of us have been there. It helped me more than anything to know there were other people (real human beings) out there who felt exactly as I did. They had all the anger, grief, frustration, doubt, oh the list of emotions this puts you through is endless. Being able to share that with people who truly understand is very helpful in recovery.

In your beginning post you asked if it was a gradual thing seeing the truth about 'the truth". I can't remember. When I was df'd I just ran headlong into the world. It was only about 6-7 years ago that I seriously started thinking about God again. So, of course, where did I turn? I tried going back to the meetings and just couldn't sit through them. I remember being at a bookstudy when they were going through the Isiah book, and sitting there thinking--WTF?

Somehow after being away for 15 years, it just didn't make sense anymore--and I was taught this crap from birth! So I started reading the bible. It made alot of sense. By the time I got around to reading CoC, it told me what I already knew.

Don't forget to breathe! I had a dear friend on another board who would always PM me when I was freaking out and say "Breathe!" That helped. The depression could come and go.

This too shall pass, Oompa. Hang in there.

Dinah

funny thing about being sad...especially now of all times w/ snow & NBC

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