For afew years a have been fading and telling my wife how I feel about such false doctrines as Blood Transfusions, 607 b.c.e date etc. etc. At first she would say "Don't talk to me about discouraging things!!" Since I haven't been attending meetings or field service for over 2 years she has slowly quit 1. Witnessing, then 2. Theocratic school which she hated anyway but was forced to do. 3.Attending meetings. I find it wierd being "worldly" I still feel that fear and guilt. Like when we voted for the first time last week. It was HER idea to vote...unreal! I feel like an alien leaving the Mother ship fpr the first time. We seem to be doing Okay. One problem is our Old friends and my family are Witnesses. If they visit us how can I take them to meetings? After 10 years of zealous service as Pioneer/servant I found ALL the Elders and Publishers too scared to ever ask me WHY I left. Sometimes they still visit like a week ago. But it's all "how you going we miss you." {Arrhhh} "Hows work." If anyone pushed me at all I would fire both barrells...but no one dares. I was famous for my research ablity in tearing up other religions.{before turning this on myself] I guess they know I have good reasons and back off....even my old Pioneer partner rang last month. I know he's heard all about me from others. He doesn't dare ask me WHY. He's like; "Yeah, let's get together I miss you. {Arrrh} Let's go out Witnessing and have lunch." I know he won't find the time so I agree. I don't have many {correction ANY} worldly friends but we have each other and my dogs I think I will be Okay. Alone or with friends I don't really mind...but my wife is a people person it will drive her nuts for sure.
P.S If one more Witness tells me ;"We miss you!" I'm going to go friggin nutcase crazy!!!