What DOES DAing say to a JW?

sweet pea

Besty and I are of the opinion that if more people DA'd and said they didn't believe in the whole thing, it would send a serious message to JWs. You wouldn't need to actually criticize the organisation, avoiding the 'apostate' label.

We know that for many, fading is the only option right now, because of the pain involved in losing friends and family but, surely, if enough people went down this route, then more would have the courage to do the same?

Or do the dubs immediately think when someone DA's that 'Satan has got another one' and stop their brains from pursuing the matter any further?

What IS the best way to help JWs to really think?

I have mixed feelings right now about the whole thing.

Thoughts?

Gadget

When someone used to DA it always used to make me think about why they'd done it, but do you not think thats part of the reason they changed the way the announcements are made to simply stating that xxxx is no longer one of jehovahs witnesses? Now when the rumour mill gets going all sorts of things will be mentioned, and because people like to justify their own position jw's will be much more likely to believe the stories that externalise the problem (that the person was weak and committed fornication) rather than internalise it (that there is a problem with the organisation and the person made a conscious decision to no longer be a part of it).

One way to get round this would be to send a copy of your DA letter to everyone you know, but with this you run the risk of triggering phobias that all ex-jws are apostates trying to snare people from jehovah. Once this happens no matter how much sense your arguement makes they won't listen to it, or any subsequent intervention you plan in the future.

See you both tommorow night!

Paul

mkr32208

Yup the way it is now no one (except the elders) really knows if you DA'ed or got DF'ed same announcment!

Gadget

What IS the best way to help JWs to really think?

I think the main thing is not to expect things to happen fast. It takes 6 months of studying gradually doing more and more before someone is considered for baptism, so I think its logical to think it would take the same to deprogramme them.

Use the same techniques as the witnesses. Start with little questions to make them think. When I was a witness I used to notice odd things that I thought wasn't right. Over years I noticed more and more and decided to look into it. Once this started I seemed to hit a critical mass and decided I couldn't be a jw anymore. The actual thing that tipped for me was the use of influence in recruitment and retention of members, but it could have been anything. Different people give different reasons for leaving, the UN, child molestation, etc, but I know for me as a witness none of these individually would have been an unsurmountable issue if was not for the thinking I had done in the years leading up to it.

I think the hard thing would be to keep people aware as to whats going on to allow them to see whats going on, but without pushing too hard/passing judgement on it. If the persons not ready to leave and you push too hard you'll set off a trigger, be labelled apostate, and after that it doesn't matter what you've said.

Paul

Superfine Apostate

people who DA still believe in The Truth(tm), but just don't want to live up to it's high moral standards. that's what DAing sais to a JW.

noni1974

I DA ed myself in 1997.I don't think they had changed the anouncement yet so I was anounced as disaccociated.My reason for it was because my mother was trying to force me back to meetings in order to move back into her house.I had been inactive for months and moved out for months at that point.I told her I didn't want to go back and I didn't believe it was the truth.She went to the elders and ratted me out to them.They of course wanted to talk to me about it.I refused and wrote my letter.

If my mom had not forced the issue I more than likely would have just faded away.Now I am glad I DA ed because I don't have to hide my life from anyone.I live an honest life and I have my intergrity.I tell my mom who I'm dateing and she knows I have sex.I don't have to hide any thing.I told my mom a long time ago I am under no obligation to live by JW rules because I made a stand for myself.My mom and dad accept it.I still talk to my family.

I heard a rumor a year ago or so that I was gay.That I guess was what was spread around as a reason for my leaving.My Aunt even asked me this summer if I was gay.I told her no I like men and I've only dated men.I'm not gay at all.I guess in their minds they can't understand someone leaving because they think it's a load of crap.

oompa

DA=We are the antichrist and HATE everything Jehovah related..............oompa

sacrebleu

I DAd in the mid 80s. And they called DEMANDING that I meet with the elders.

I refused and they announced I was DF at the next Sunday's meeting.

So it didn't help a thing. I think the reason why they've changed the announcement is that people are suing (how do you spell that?)

Anyway, has anyone ever successfully sued over this defimation of character thing? I wish I had thought to tell them that I would sue over the DF like others I've met on-line. One guy sent a copy of the letter to everyone in his cong! I didn't think of that. But oh well,...

sacrebleu

drew sagan

One thing to remember is that they no longer distinguish between the two when the announcement is read from the platform. The announcement reads "__________ is no longer a Jehovah's Witness".

It's a great way making everybody think that person was disfellowshipped.

sir82

1) As noted above, there is currently no way to distinguish if someone is DF or DA - they just say "XXX is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses".

2) Even "back in the day" when you could tell the difference, a likely reaction from a typical JW would be something like "well, he must have done something horribly immoral and perverted and he knew he was going to be DF, so to save himself embarrassment, he just DA instead."

What DOES DAing say to a JW?

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