by llbh 40 Replies latest jw friends
On recent a thread a poster here discussed about having discovered his daughter was gay. Whilst reading this my 11 year old son was looking over my shoulder, and reading along with me, some of the discussion was quite adult but respectful
So i began thinking what age would you discuss these things? He is not gay as far as i can see. but i think it is important for to understand differing lifestyles
What do you thin and feel?
llbh
Most kids already hear gay and lesbian subject matter on the playground at around the ages of 9-11; at least I did 30 years ago back in the 70s and judging about how far the world and society in general has gotten especially with TV and pop culture I would start around the time they start asking questions. If you are not there to educate them on subjects like that, they are going to get information elsewhere.
LRG
I say, if they ask, answer according to age. They definately are smarter than we were at their age! All the resources available and what not.
4
I would say at any age, most kids know more than you think. Just teach tolerance, respect and understanding
yeah I agree with littlerock- he already knows about gay people especially being a boy, especiall being 11 and going to school, so you can start really at any age really. I mean it is in our mainstream culture and has been for ever in some way shape or form when you think about it. the supah effeminate guy whose every movement makes you laugh? The woman who looked talked and sounded like a man... I remember being younger and watching IN Living Color and the skit with Damon Wayne's and David Allen Grier as the highly effeminate movie critics and how every movement, action or thing they said was funny... and I laughed my little ass off without really know why.
So really the perfect age is... i dont know really. i mean if you wait for them to bring it up then you might have this conversation @25 or something. I think it should be gradual like anything else. a kid asks for info on where babies come from and you tell them- gradually. they see people kissing and stuff and you tell them. I think @ the age he is at now is really perfect 'cause he's in middle school is I believe an tha tis around the age that kids these days are dealing with sex, so yeah..
For me it started when my oldest son was about 10 or 11. He had made a comment about gay men, showing distaste and I knowing that he mostlikely learned this attitude from the kids at school alerted my son that several of my husband's closest friends were gay. My son did not know this and was shocked. I let my son know that I don't have the same dislike for gays and I told him why. This is an ongoing discussion.
Josie
Lrg
yeah i agree they are smarter and more than i was. it was hardly ever discussed when i was young
say what, I hear what u say about waiting for them to bring the subject up but what happens if they do not ask?
I would like to know some of what they are thinking
Wordly Andre I think tolerance is so important, to do this we need to know what they think
llbh
As with all sexual subjects, the child tends to ask a question at the time in their life when they are ready for an answer - but in line with their intellectual capacity.
"Mommy - what's a gay man?"(Little Johnny aged 7)
"gay men like to put their penises fists tie eachother up blah blah etc" is totally inappropriate.
A better answer would be "a gay man wants to love and cuddle other men."
The Witchtower exposes young kids to far too detailed information, often before they are ready for it. The Gibbering Buddy overrides parental knowledge of their own kids and just spills all the beans on everything at the Kingdumb Hell, and the parents then have to deal with the fall out.
Can't you just tell they never had kids of their own??
I Remember the "Paradise Regained " book when I was a kid saying "the men of Sodom wanted sexual relations with Lots visitors." I had underlined the answer, then asked "WHAT DOES SEXUAL RELATIONS MEAN?"
HB
12 and 9, when my sister came out 2 months ago. It has given me an opportunity to teach them to still love someone who is doing something they don't really like. And to still be polite even if you don't like someone. They are feeling jealous over her girlfriend and her 2 yr old. They've been the only neices and girls in auntie's life so far. They are also learning sisters are forever, as their Grandma is shunning all of us.
momz
I remember my son went through a phase when he was about 11 of refering to others as being "Gay". So I asked him if he knew what it meant and the conversation went from there. Children vary in emotional maturity so I think it is best to speak about it when you consider they are ready.
Maddie
