My years as a Social Misfit - memories come flooding back!

Princess Daisy Boo

So I was on Facebook last night and just started randomly searching names and checking out people I knew, their profiles and friends etc and I came across a whole bunch of names of JW people I knew as a teenager. A whole host of memories came flooding back, unpleasant and happily forgotten memories.

... feeling lonley, unpopular, gossip, cliquiness, bitchy comments, feeling like I would never attract a suitable "brother" for courtship and other such silliness...

I went to bed feeling very disturbed and sad and uncomfortable and I had a horrible night. But the fact is, I am now an adult and I am generally well liked by most I meet (or so I think ) I have a great family, loads of friends and so on.

So can anyone shed any light on why I feel so crap!

Princess Daisy Boo

Or maybe I am still a social misfit - at least on JWD based on the lack of replies - c'mon guys, I am feeling a bit fragile here...

Amber Rose

attract a suitable "brother" for courtship

I love that you used this phrase. Talk about memories flooding back!

Wordly Andre

It's kind of weird for me, I always had worldly friends, never really any JW's friends growing up, however recently I talked to my cousin, and she said the same thing you just wrote about, she found some old Jehovies on myspace, I told her that she should be more shocked they are even using a computer! I feel bad for those of you who only had friends in the ORG. But at least this website is really awesome to find new friends who feel the same way and come from the same background. Lots of understanding people here

Gopher

From one social misfit (when a young JW) to another, I feel for you.

I've been out of there 7 years now, so most of the bad memories are specks in the rear view mirror. Once in a while I'll reminisce, but it's usually with other ex-JW friends of mine here in my area who knew some of the same people that I knew, and we have a good laugh.

I know that any social group (schools, churches) can have people who will treat you unkindly. I put that on them and not on me, because people who get to know me usually like me. I suspect the same is true of you, PDB.

Princess Daisy Boo

The funny thing, Andre, is that I don't have the same bad memories when I come across ex school friends on Facebook. When I see the familiar names of Dub kids, I imagine them barely remembering me (not that I really want to get in touch with them again) but when I see the names of the kids I went to school with, I have no hesitation in contacting them and believing they will remember me.

Princess Daisy Boo

Good point Gopher!

RisingEagle

This happens to me whenever I take a trip in the wayback machine of my mind. I can't do anything to change the past, but it doesn't stop me from reliving it either. I know that you already know the cure - you mentioned them- the relationships that you've made when you moved on with family and friends.

You are better than you once were or you'd still be wallowing in the pit with the witlings. You win!

kifoy

{{{{{Princess}}}}}

... feeling lonley, unpopular, gossip, cliquiness, bitchy comments, feeling like I would never attract a suitable "brother" for courtship and other such silliness...

Well, I know exactly how that feels!

Sometimes I too have memories and feelings flooding back to me. It's not a good feeling. But thinking about it, that you need to look back to feel that way, it's not that bad either.

Within reason, of course.

When I look back to my teens as a JW, I see a totally different girl that what I have become. I too feel sad when thinking about all the loneliness, and some of the few good friends I had back then.
And finding them (seemingly) happy and well on Facebook, sure is a trigger.

If you're really struggling with this, a little professional help won't hurt. At least it did me good.

Good luck to you!

kifoy

lfcviking

I would never attract a suitable "brother"

I'd take you out babe!

My years as a Social Misfit - memories come flooding back!

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