Some things I have noticed since my husband has gone back to the KH (page 2)

Mrs. Witness

Goodness Gracious, welcome and I feel your pain. I, too, was never a JW but have married one who decided to go back after we were married. Good luck. It's a long hard road.

Finally-Free

~ The truth don’t change

Correct, but the Watchtower does, which means they don't have the "truth".

W

DoubleVision

Hi GG

I know how you feel. Kinda like this.

DV

Hortensia

"It seems he is both creating the alienation you're feeling and blaming you for it."

Gopher has it in one, as usual. I sympathize - keep strong, don't give up what you believe and who you are to help your husband stay in the org. Stay out, be happy, I hope he'll be tired of it all one day and join you.

Gopher

GG -

Oh, I didn't know about your young son. (Based on what you posted he must be age 5 or less.) That makes it a sticky situation. Like you, I am glad the JW nonsense stopped with my generation, and I would never dream of making my children go through that (or isolating my children from me because of differences in beliefs).

Funny how he says he's following the Bible and not a religion. And he really believes it. And he believes you will be destroyed if you don't toe the Watchtower line -- how stressful must that be?! I just hope he doesn't teach your son that insidious hateful message when he gets older.

Hang in there, you're doing a great job standing your ground on the JW issues.

drew sagan

First of all let me say what I haven't yet said.

Welcome to the forum!

A number of people here are giving you rebuttles and arguments that could be used. I think that in a situation like yours logicial argumentation means very little. Your hubby is currently an active member of a minority reilgion that believes the entire cosmos revolves around it. The Watchtower is a self centered ideologicial system and you are starting to notice that attitude leaking into the everyday life of your marriage.

I think taking your time and educating yourself about where your husband is will be the most beneficial for you. The more you learn about why he actually is acting that way, the better you will find creative ways to cope with it.

It's important to relaize that religions like the JWs do provide their members with a number of differant "benefits". This can include (but is not limited to) giving people security, confidence, a feeling of superiority, and hope. Right now you are starting to see how your husband is becoming indulgent in his piety, the superiority that the group is giving is just pouring out of him. He is really feeling superior, and is letting you know it.

He says these things so that you will challenge him on "intellectual" points. He wants to argue with you about what he believes is "the truth". He wants to prove to you that he has the "the truth".

If you don't know it already, JWs cheat when they debate.Getting into arguments with JWs can be quite pointless, because they never debate fairly. They have no concept of the idea that you can win an argument but still be wrong. They will call you names, reason in a circle, use special pleading, ect. What you need to know is that engaging them can really turn into a mess because they will never be fair, they will do whatever it takes to win an argument no matter how dirty the tactic.

Take time to learn about why he believes what he does (or why anybody does for that matter). Understand where he is. Also take time to study logicial fallicies and proper argumentation. Stay away from arguments about "the truth" they are just a trick.

Keep us posted and ask lots of questions. We will help you out!

-Drew

bigmouth

Welcome GG. I'm going to read your past posts and get a better idea of what's happening to you.

You obviously love your husband and know the 'truth'. If I was in your shoes my guts would be turning. You need to keep in love with him and keep sane. Maybe he's going to get his mid life crisis out of the way early?!

Best wishes,
Pete

VoidEater

I was wondering...now that he will have an unbelieving mate, what are the consequences for him?

GoodnessGracious

VoidEater – I was wondering that myself. Im not sure if I would have married him so quickly if I knew he would go back.

We got into a heated discussion last night, I was like I am NOT going to the Kingdom Hall, he is WHY? Im like, why would I go if I don’t want to be a JW, isn’t that the point of going there? I mean, Im sure Ill go once or twice, but that will probably be the most I can stomach without busting out laughing. He kept asking what do I have against witnesses, im like look, yall go to church too much, he says, so god isn’t worth your time .. LMAO … It has become comical.

Thanks drew sagan for the welcome – I know, I need to get my game up LOL .. He really believes what they stand for .. Gopher - yes my son is 2. But I think growing up in a mixed household will give him more of an option. His dad will take him , you know I cant control everything, but he will know that he always has a choice no matter what anyone says ? My husband did say last night that it was his responsibility to lead our son , so he asks me what would I do if he read our son the bible, I said, I don’t care, I don’t have a problem with the bible, but he said, but you have a problem with the publications, and I said Yup .. he kind of left it at that. I think he is in shock with me right now. My defense mechanism when I feel like Im getting attacked is that I get real nonchalant and cavalier attitude and he doesn’t knw how to take it, lol.. its quite funny. I haven’t hit him with the hardcore things yet. Only because I don’t feel like Ive been pushed.

(((SMILES)))) – Thanks!!!

(( Mrs. Witness )) - I already know. I told him that I don’t think Satan runs the world because, God is more powerful than Satan, and if Satan is running this world that means that God is allowing it to be that way. He looked so furious LOL.. We got into a discussion about how I think that people have to go through things in life, OMG, he was about to bust , LOL ,.. my rationale is that people are imperfect, so they are going to make mistakes and go through pain because of them, that’s the realization of being human . I shouldn’t be laughing. But his reaction to some things is ridiculous!

nelly136

welcome GG, i'm sorry you've been brought here under these circumstances, but its nice to meet you

it could be in your better interests to see how you stand medically if you have jw next of kin when it comes to who is signing your consent forms for treatment should you or your child should be unconscious, you could find you both share entirely different ideas of what treatment is acceptable for you or your child.

Some things I have noticed since my husband has gone back to the KH

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