Hi, First Post

AuroraB

Hey there. I'm new to the forums and just had to say hi, and thank you to all of you who've shared your stories which have let me know finally and for sure that I'M NOT CRAZY and nowhere near as abnormal as I've been feeling...well, forever, really, but more so over these last few years!!! I can't tell you what a good feeling that is, but I suspect you already know. More important, I'm finally seeing that it's actually possible to leave this life and succeed, which is the exact opposite of what I've been taught (and recently, outright told). It's really very sad to me that I've probably got to let go of everything in order to start over, but then again, when I honestly look at it, there's not that much left to let go of. From what I've been reading, my story is a pretty typical, "I grew up in 'the truth' story". I believed. I mean, I really believed. Despite the clicks in the congregation my family was never really part of, the people on power trips, the slandering liars, the backstabbing, the isolation, the manipulation, the depression, the lack of true friends, the...you know what I'm talking about. Despite it all, I still believed. I had a sad home life though, so most of my energy was focused on moving on and moving out when I was of age, which I did, then became inactive, then active again, then inactive again. My circumstances have recently changed and now the elders all of a sudden have this special love for me that they didn't have before (meaning, they're now aware I'm not dead and haven't moved across the country and someone has directed them to go after inactive ones). At first, I rolled with the visits because I still believed. It felt good to have someone visit you, hug you and tell you that they loved you. But after another visit from an elder and his wife, I started to really think about the things they had been blatantly saying to me during their visits, and my eyes popped open; the brain turned on. These were not nice people. They were not trying to help me. They did not love me. They were after something else. And I'm betting you can fill the story in from there... Anyway, wanted to send my greetings out and also find out how you all figured out how to survive. I plan on moving this year, and will really, truly have to start from scratch. How do you make friends? How do you begin to stick your toe into waters that you're still a bit afraid of? Peace

free2think

Welcome to JWD AuroraB

changeling

Welcome!

changeling

Hiddenwindow

Helo, Aurora:

Welcome to the forum. On the matter of love, you are right. It also makes me think on friendship. Although still in, I realize that there cannot be real friends where your interaction with them is absolutely dependent on loyalty to the WT.

lfcviking

Welcome!

DJK

Despite the clicks in the congregation my family was never really part of, the people on power trips, the slandering liars, the backstabbing, the isolation, the manipulation, the depression, the lack of true friends

Wow, you covered just about everything in one sentence. LOL

Welcome to the forum.

llbh

Welcome Aurora

To make friends go to college - i did.If you have children help out up the school .Finding friends outside takes time but is worth it

I left a while ago and now have some very good friends

Regards David

Purza

Welcome Aurora

How do you make friends? How do you begin to stick your toe into waters that you're still a bit afraid of

I have had success making friends with people I work with. Perhaps you could start there. Or if you are in to activities (i.e. mountain biking, tennis, cooking, etc.) you could probably find a club to join and you could make friends that way. Just a few thoughts/suggestions.

I know it is not easy making friends cause as a JW you had all the friends you wanted. Away from that atmosphere, I find that being a friend and actually caring about other individuals goes a long way to keeping the friends I have made

Purza

Victorian sky

Warm welcome Aurora, You are very brave for leaving. I did the active/inactive thing several times before leaving for good. It will be a challenge to move forward with your life but believe me, it is well worth it and you can do it. You will discover things about yourself, cool things, that you never knew before. You can explore ambitions and dreams. I know I got honest with myself about what I really wanted in life and it was liberating. You can make friends, real, true friends who won't leave you just because you don't believe the same things they do. Maybe you can go back to school or join a local club/association or volunteer for community service - you could meet loads of people that way. Also, if you're interested in politics you can volunteer at one of the local campaign offices. There is a lot to do, places to see and good people to meet. I met wonderful people at church (yes, I'm a Christian and I love it - but you may not be ready for that yet, believe me, I understand) You have plenty of options. It's so sad how JWs expect you to self destruct after leaving them. This board was a life saver when I first left, with all the support I got. And I met my husband on this board too so you never know:) JWs don't understand when you are thriving, happy and blessed. The best sermon you can give to a JW is to be happy. Welcome again! - Love, V Sky

wings

You covered so much with so few words.

WELCOME

You will find friends here....that is a start.

Hi, First Post

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