Yeah my brother lived at home until my mom re-married and told him to go find his own place and he was like 24. No cultural reason or financial either...just wanted to free-load off her.
MMO
How many JWs do you know that have "Failure to Launch" Syndrome
by BBOARD 32 Replies latest jw friends
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tula
I am so glad you brought up this topic. It hits very close to home with me and I am really hoping all of you can help me to understand because this makes me MAD and it makes me very SAD at the same time.
I know a JW man-child who is 50+ and has never left home. He does not do any pioneer work. He makes occassional meetings. His father is a control-freak elder. He rules the family with an iron hand. His wife is timid...if she DARES to voice an opinion she is reminded of her obligation to be "submissive". The poor boy-man has never had a friend in all the years I have known him. He is not allowed to have time for extra activities and must account to the elder father for his time and whereabouts. He also must, in a sense "ask permission" by giving details of his intentions before he leaves the house. The elder father treats them like they are there to SERVE and OBEY him. He works for the father and is treated like slave labor.
Even as a young child he was very isolated and not allowed to have pets. Because, after all, animals die and that's painful. JW children are isolated and ostracized enough as it is. But to be denied even the comfort of a pet when you have no companions seems like extreme isolation for a child.
He rarely has anything to say. It is as though he just resigned early on to his fate. He has been so dominated that by now, he probably could not function in the world by himself. I have actually seen intimidation tactics used by his father. If he dares to speak up or have an idea that he thinks might work better and its in contradiction to what his father has said, the father will stand toe to toe in front of him about 3 inches from his face and make a "how dare you question me" remark.
This elder is one of the stupidest people you could ever meet. He cannot hold a normal conversation. His conversations consist of quoting the same worn out scriptures and one-liner jokes. But yet, he commands such authority at the KH and I am sure he has ruined a lot of people's lives. He is a vindictive person and always likes to "be in the Know". In other words he sticks his nose into everyone's business so it will give him something to be in charge of as far as bringing people into the jc so the elders don't go "jobless".
It seems like the cult mentality trickles down even into homelife. People are made as slaves in their own homes like in this situation. It's all about power and control. How is it that a person with zilch intellect can wield such power over people?
Why do these parents not realize the responsibility to TEACH their children the value of being able to have their own life? Don't they realize the child will flounder and be lost if they pass on and the child has never been taught any independence? Why do they not value that learning about the world around then is a way to show appreciation for their Creator?
I mentioned this to someone a while back and they suggested that these types of "adult children" end up like Ed Gein. (This was the wierdo on whom the character of "Buffalo Bill" was based. Silence of the Lambs) Some say these child adults end up as anti-social psychopaths.
Can anyone give me a profile on what happens to these adult children?
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oldflame
There are a lot of young adults in the organization living with parents because the organization stunts their development by not allowing them to become educated so they wont depend upon their parents and organization so much.
This is so sad, these young people are being deprived of education and forced to be burger flippers and window washers. Sure it takes all kinds to make the world go round but it should always be their own choice. Not the governments choice and not religions choice. Gee I do believe that God gave Adam and Eve the choice but yet a religion trying to take away something that God specifically gave is nonspiritual. Oh they say they do not take away their choice and they may not dis-fellowship you for going to college but you do gain a certain amount of lets say brownie points when you pioneer. They should be ashamed for all these accounts.
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betterdaze
tula, as disturbing as it is, thanks for painting that mental picture for us.
I know a JW guy who's lived with his parental units all his natural life and has been referred to as "Norman" from Psycho, as in,
"NORMAN, don't touch those filthy girls!"
He's pushing 40. He has no reason or desire to grow up / move out as long as his JW household and the WTS tell him what to do.
When he had scriptural questions that didn't jive with the publications, he was immediately interrogated about masturbation habits.
How sick is that? Male lurkers here on JWD need to know: If you question doctrines, expect accusations of masturbation, something
Jesus never even mentioned.
Shame on the man-child Brooklyn slavers that run the cult! They enslaved this guy as a tiny boy and are denying him a full life even now.
~Sue -
sass_my_frass
That was me; took until age 23 and I didn't do uni (until now!). My youngest brother; 27 I think.
Lemme see who else... Rob; mid-forties, tall and dark and not very interesting but harmless enough, just doesn't want to leave his mum alone.
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momzcrazy
I know one in particular. He was a good 30 when he married a 20 yr old. He was my dad's friend and had asked me out, but nooo thank you. He had lived in his parent's house his whole life. When he got married they bought a double wide in the trailer park where alot of other witnesses lived. Within a year they sold it and moved back to his parent's house. They still live there with their 2 kids.
momz
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Tired of the Hypocrisy
Ha I know about 5 families like this. One guy is just a lazy hump. The others are locked into the mentality of stay home til I am married.This is fine, except some of these kids are in hteir 30's! Nice looking girls some of them too. One neighbor went up to my wife's uncle and asked him outright, "Why don't they ever come out or date? Are you keeping them in there for your own pleasure?" He got hella mad but didn't deny it! He is a perv too, my wife's uncle I mean. He drinks too much and makes lude comments all day long. He started pioneering and no one in the cong or the family could believe they let his ass go out and preach.He came home the other day and said he had so much fun. All the husbands working in the fields like animals and him enjoying their wives! What an ass.
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Trevanian
Welcome to the Jerry Springer Discussion Forum.
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Samuel Thorsen
Two guys in my congo aged 39 and 32 are still living at home with their parents. Both are mentally destroyed by the borg and none of them will probably ever have a normal life on this side of Armageddon
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R.Crusoe
It sounds like deprivation till one accepts the pain of deprivation and has lost all skills to do otherwise in spite of themselves harboring all natural human ambitions to do so. Like prison culture which causes institutionalisation! They have now been completely conditioned to believe they have complete freedom not to be free! They have complete choice not to choose! They have completed their sexual fruition not to have sex. They have realised their quest for happiness not to be happy! etc.