Hi Layla,
I did at first when I was all jesus crazy. Now I just pray to myself since I think I might be jesus reborn
by Layla33 36 Replies latest jw friends
Hi Layla,
I did at first when I was all jesus crazy. Now I just pray to myself since I think I might be jesus reborn
Yes, not as often as I should though.
Nope. I can't, and have no desire to. When LDB and I first agreed to studying with the borg, I was one of those who said "I'll never become a JW." Well as the story goes, I did become a JW. I fought it at the very beginning, because what little I knew about the dubs then was what I thought was weird; for example, not celebrating Christmas, going door to door, believing only 144,000 would go to heaven.
I was raised Methodist, and LDB was raised Christian Scientist. I wanted us to come to some sort of agreement about religion before we got married. I prayed fervently for God to direct me to whatever religion he wanted me to participate in; whatever he wanted I would do. Well, within a few days, LDB's workmate offered a home bible study. I was sure this was god's answer to my prayer, so I jumped in to the borg with two feet.
Now, after 14 years in the borg and out for 1 1/2 years, I feel stupid for praying to "god" to guide me to whatever religion he wanted; and I feel stupid for believing he answered my prayer by sending the JWs to us. I feel betrayed, I guess, in a way. I don't really know if there's a god. I don't really care to know right now. I just know that one very honest-hearted prayer landed me in a CULT for 14 years; I'm poorer and have less friends than before I was a borg. I missed out on 14 years of my life. That's what prayer did for me.
I was sure this was god's answer to my prayer,
Yeah, I thought the same thing. But you know, I've learned that we can't chalk stuff up to God and then blame him when we are mistaken.
I do but not because of guilt I pray when I really feel it and it's wonderful because it's not because I feel I have to pray it's because I feel I want to
To what?
Yes. My prayers are more heartfelt now, most likely because I don't feel so guilty about not being perfect that particular day.
I am finding it difficult to pray right now.
Maddie
Yes.
Warlock
I was sure this was god's answer to my prayer,Yeah, I thought the same thing. But you know, I've learned that we can't chalk stuff up to God and then blame him when we are mistaken.
I don't know; I always was told that we should 'chalk stuff up to God', or "leave your burdens with God" or (excuse me while I gag) "Let go and let God" . That's what I sincerely did when I prayed for guidance in finding the religion that would please him. And I ended up in the borg.
I can't say I "blame" god for this, because I am currently in doubt of his existance. I blame myself for being so gullible to think that if there was a god and if he heard my prayer, that he would actually intervene in my life and show me what he wanted me to do. I was mistaken, for sure.
So as I've said in other posts, for now, if god exists and if god wants to communicate something to me, he'll have to come crashing down into my living room with thunder and flashing neon lights and tell me directly. Otherwise, I am learning to trust myself, to make my own decisions without worrying if I should ask for god's "approval" first.