Well I don't know quite what to think OOTB, I am slightly confused by all of this but I haven't been on the board in serval weeks so I didn't see any of your previous threads.
First of all we have(JWD) been informed the WTS has great interest on this board, they apparently come in and check out what is happening so here is what I am thinking. If you are going to be or are an new elder, and the WTS is lurking in here aren't you concerned that they will find out your identity? It isn't hard anymore to find out who is who these days. I am sure the WTS has hackers. I mean lets face it the WTS is paranoid. They have to see what so called subversive things apostates are doing. They have dropped to this level of spying. Paranoia is rampant in the organization. They figure everyone is out to get them.. Just like all the early founders of this organization. It seems its foundation is based on that word...
Secondly, I know that it has happened in the past that men have infiltrated the organization and gotten pretty close to the top so as to "GET the INFO" on how JW's function and what kind of trouble they can stir up in the congregations. They apparently did this during the War Years. There were inflitartors who would send out letters of directions to the congregation and using the letter head of the Society causing huge rifts with in the congregation and with the Organization. Now I am taking this to be quite factual as my father who was once an elder and I to recall reading older copies of yearbooks that told of such stories. Men going to great lengths to cause self destruction in the ranks of the witnesses.
Thirdly aren't you afraid that you could be discovered.? If so how do you think this will affect your wife and children your marriage? And it could very well happen that it may backfire on you. Have you calculated the cost in emotional and mental anguish and stress this will put on your family and your self?
Don't get me wrong OOTB, you sound sincere, but really it is like your walking on unsafe ice. What if you hurt the ones you love? Will they dispise you or will they forgive you when your found out? I mean lets face it at some point and time your going to end up in some kind of hot water. Putting on a facade for so long can be really hard, healthwise it could kill you, you could cause someone you love to do harm to themselves. Isn't this price to high ?
I just can't computate in my mind what you hope this will all accomplish. The congregations are full of gossipers and spies. I know this all to well , as my father was really good at spying on others in the congregation. He'd go to any length to find someone doing something wrong. I am sure between his years of self indulgence as an alcoholic and the years of playing a secret cop put him in an early grave. Not that that matters to me, as he hurt so many people on his HIGH and MIGHTY POWERFULL EGO TRIPS he lost me years and years ago. I had no respect for him what so ever. He was a Toxic man in the cong. and at home he was a toxic parent as well as my mother. Toxic parents can destroy a child or marriage quicker than anything else. Don't get me wrong I am not saying your Toxic, but it could develop without your knowing it. Being Toxic to you family and to the people you assert to love is a dangerous thing that your doing .
My depth of concern is for your wellbeing and that of your family. Woundn't it be easier to sit down with your wife and tell her the truth and see if you can show her the dangers of the WTBTS? Truthfulness is the better route. I am not you and I don't know anything about you. So I don't know what else to tell you. You haven't got a profile so I can understand what or where you are coming from.
Far be it for me to be judgemental but you must be honest to yourself. Playing a game can in some cases lead to a tremendous loss. Or you may win. But whatever route you go remember there will be consequences.
Orangefatcat