JW spanking their kids (page 4)

Quillsky

This quote from a year ago....

I got plenty of spankins as a kid and I turned out great

makes me so angry .

It is typically used by parental child abusers and only serves to perpetuate the cycle of child abuse, from generation to generation. "It didn't harm me.... see, I'm okay now'.

I agree with all comments on this thread about the peer pressure aspect at the Hall or the book study or at home, beating children to "impress" other JW parents. I've been out for a while now, so I'd be interested to know whether this culture still exists amongst Jehovah's Witnesses? I certainly grew up amongst a wicked coven of Wooden Spoon Mothers and an evil gang of Leather Belt Fathers.

I also detest the word "spanking", an attempt to make beating a child sound somehow mild and harmless. So where is the line between using a hand or implement to hurt and leave red imprints on a little girl's buttocks and using a fist to draw blood from her eye or crack her little skull? Seriously, where exactly is that line?

cognac

Honestly, I rarely see spankings in the kh anymore. I think JW parents, at least from what I've seen, don't spank as much. And I've been to about 8 halls or so in the last 8-10 years. There is much complaint about the backrooms being used as playrooms but parents don't seem to care much.

15 or 20 years ago there were tons of spankings. I'm glad to see JW parents are much better in that area...

DaCheech

i spank my kids lightly when they are endangering themselves and can't take nonstop warnings. I never beat them.

I also never spank them at the hall, I just take them for walks and side rooms............. the hall situation is not child friendly and I can't blame the kids for not being quiet. meetings are setup for adults and children have no interest in this stuff........... bastard watchtower!

SirNose586

The rod was never spared on me. Hell, I remember trying to hide my parents' belts so I couldn't be spanked.

This is starting to bring up some really bad memories for me...

Yeah, I think I'll look into disciplining without resorting to violence. Those books would be good to research. Otherwise I'd be in danger of probably perpetuating the cycle.

IMHO

Why do people have to be so judgmental. They're entitled to their opionion but that doesn't mean they are right.

In this thread people have quoted 'experts' who say it's wrong to smack. But what do 'experts' know? What makes them an expert?

Way back in the 1940's and 1950's, Dr. Benjamin Spock made popular the idea that spanking children was not good way to discipline them. In fact, Dr. Spock claimed that spanking kids actually hurts them and so spanking kids should be avoided at all costs.

UK child psychiatrist, Professor John Pearce, is on record as thinking that childcare over the years has gone astray. "I would warn against free expression," he says. "Children need to develop self-control or they become overactive. It's sad when parents are too frightened to set boundaries."

Dr. James Dobson wrote in The Strong-Willed Child (1978): “Corporal punishment in the hands of a loving parent is a teaching tool by which harmful behavior is inhibited.”

So it seems that some are saying the 'experts' that agree with me are the ones that are right.

Experts get it wrong. Dr Spock himself said he got it wrong.

The Journal of Lifetime Living said: “The child psychologists, wrangling over scheduled versus demand feeding, spanking versus non-spanking, have found that none of it makes much difference so long as the child is loved.” Even Dr. Benjamin Spock, author of Baby and Child Care, took part of the blame for the lack of parental firmness and the resulting delinquency. He said blame rested on the experts, “the child psychiatrists, psychologists, teachers, social workers and pediatricians like myself.”

The answer is LOVE your child, they will know. Even the JWs have always said you should never smack (spank) a child in anger.

Some need a smack, some need a good 'telling off', some just need 'a look'.

Look at the results. These days childen have a lot less physical punishment at home and certainly at school. Has it made children better or worse generally?

leavingwt

Some data. . .

The corporal punishment of minors within the home is lawful in all 50 of the United States and, according to a 2000 survey, it is widely approved by parents. [ 1 ] It has been officially outlawed in 25 countries around the world. [ 2 ]

Corporal punishment in school is still legal in some parts of the world, including 20 of the States of the USA, but has been outlawed in other places, including Canada, Japan, South Africa, New Zealand, and nearly all of Europe except the Czech Republic [ 3 ] and France. [ 4 ]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corporal_punishment

mrsjones5

its Horrible to hit a child for being a child, and embarrassing them as well.

There are better noncorporal ways to embarrass a child, speaking from experience

miseryloveselders

its_me!

I was born and raised as a JW, and my father was very physically and mentally abusive to my siblings and I . He was mostly inactive, but when he went to the meetings, the abuse was so much worse. Every meeting that we went to with my Dad, no matter how well we tried to behave, we knew that we were getting the belt when we got home. He had this look that he would give us, no one else ever noticed it, but we knew what it meant. We rode home in the car as silently as possible, hoping that he would forget by the time we got there. He never did. We would run upstairs as soon as we arrived and try to put on several pairs of pants so as to cushion the blows. Usually, he would take them all off of us, down to bare bottom and use the belt. We hated going to the meetings with him so much. The elders never did anything about it. At one point, a family member (worldly) called Childrens services on him, and we were even taken out of the home for a period of time. The elders had a "meeting" about it, but nothing was ever done to my father in the way of any of his privileges.

I think that is why I don't have any children of my own now. I am so afraid of passing on the same scars. Everyone always asks me when I am going to have kids. It makes me sad. I just laugh and tell them I am waiting for financial stability and health insurance. How can you tell your kids to settle their differences without violence when you are using violence against them yourself.

Johnny

I remember it being SO common for kids to get the living you-know-what beat out of them at the Kingdom Hall. I remember certain poor kids in particular. This was a long time ago, but I would be willing to bet that those "kids" are no longer in that organization. hopefully they're not in jail, mental hospitals, or worse as a result.

Free at last! Thank God!

JW spanking their kids

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