Got any advice for raising children?

JimmyPage

I'd like to raise my child to not be stressed out about holidays and flag salutes etc. I have bad memories of that sh*t from my childhood. Got any advice for a guy whose wife and parents are in the borg?

llbh

The first thing you should do is love them and treat them as the lovely people that they no doubt are

Regards David

White Dove

I would tell them that any JW holiday rules that they don't want to follow can be broken at your house and you will never ever tell the JW family.

AudeSapere

I think you need to gain support from your spouse.

Maybe you can agree that the kids can go to meetings and they can play in sports. But bedtime is 8 or 9pm everynight. Or something like that.

I'm just throwing things out there. Just suggestions off the top of my head.

How old are the kids? It might make a difference in the responses you get.

-Aude.

restrangled

Non holiday celebration is ugly but this is worse. Take a look at this thread!

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/156252/1.ashx

Make sure this does not happen in your house!

r.

yknot

I can only relate my own experiences

As a child I felt the greatest stress when visiting my Dad during the holidays because I was a true WTS follower regarding holidays. I personally never really got much flack about the flag, but I always stood-up during the pledge. Funny because I liked and always acknowledged the 4th of July (and I know the entire lyrics to national anthem), not to mention my siblings (JW and not) are all fireworks fanatics.

Now as a parent I still am not a holidays person or a flag saluter......but my husband is.... We both work off the premise that we each are entitled to our personal beliefs and to share with them with our children. We allow our children to choose what they want to participate or believe. Respect doesn't always work in a house divided but we are a 'golden rule' couple.

For B-days he is all cake and candles while I make the whole month a celebration of family (both of our kids are born in the same month).

You ultimately can only explain and share your beliefs regularly but be understanding if the child doesn't agree with you (well agree with you now, when they reach their teens you will be the parent they seek)

PS my die-hardism toward JWs stuff was because my Dad lived far away and only saw me once a month (work required travel), holidays, and 6 weeks during summer......if he had been closer and more personally involved I doubt my abstaining from holidays would be so so so...JWish.

Be loving, open to hear their opinions, and be involved with your children every step of their childhood (yea and enroll them in sports, and other activities).

WTWizard

I suggest taking the headship issue and throwing it back in their faces. If you are the head of the household and do not wish the children to become witlesses, then you make the rule that they are going to be exposed equally to other religions. And, before they get baptized, they have to have read Crisis of Conscience through and be of a reasonable age. No getting baptized at age 6.

alamb

Don't mold them, unfold them.

Just out-love them. Love will ALWAYS win. Remind them you will love them no matter what life course they choose and that you can no long love them unconditionally as a JW parent would. You will always be there...no matter what. They can't beat that.

BurnTheShips

I'd like to raise my child to not be stressed out about holidays and flag salutes etc. I have bad memories of that sh*t from my childhood. Got any advice for a guy whose wife and parents are in the borg?

Love them Don't try to force them into a mold, let them be their own selves. At the same time, don't be scared to discipline when necessary. It's a tough job. Love is what works, not fear or anger. Burn

free2beme

Always adapt your child to your life and not your life to your child.

Got any advice for raising children?

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