Past my prime and now I'm tired (page 2)

JBean

Welcome to the board and to the pushing-40 club, Jo! You will definitely find lots of encouragement here...as well as quite a few laughs! Enjoy every day of life, it's so precious! Roll with the punches, as they say. If you expect to have moods or emotions that swing back and forth sometimes hour to hour, you won't be too disappointed... it's normal. ps: And 40 IS NOT old!!!! I still feel like I'm 20 (except on cold, rainy Monday mornings!) : )

Simon

All the things I could have done...

The things I was good at and enjoyed but didn't persue...

People I knew and liked and didn't keep in touch with...

The wasted hours sat listening to morons talking drivel...

Driving to meetings, walking pavements, reading worthless books...

But it isn't all wasted because I will make sure my kids don't have my life. They will get the opportunities to do whatever they are good at and enjoy because I will make sure of it. I'm 34 and learning to 'live' but it's hard sometimes. I really wish I hadn't had my youth squandered for me but I'm not going to waste the rest of it and above all, I'm going to enjoy it with my family.

JeffT

I was aborbed when I was 22. I escaped when I was 38. For a time I greived over what I saw as lost years. I've gotten past that. I use my experience as a springboard to help others in similar situations.

I'm writing a book.

You still have a lot a head of you. Live it to the fullest.

Undecided

Hi Jo,

You are now in your prime years, pushing 40 is a great time to start enjoying your life. I know what you are going through, I left the JW life at that age for the same reason, I felt smothered with so many responsibilities that I just left. This was in 1973 and I remember saying to myself, to have a couple of years for myself before the end in 1975 it would be worth leaving.

I got married again, fathered a kid and have never regretted it, not one time since. Iv'e had a great life. Do what YOUR heart leads you to do and never look back. I wouldn't trade all those years in the Borg. for one day with my family now, of course I may have been lucky and it could have been a tragic mistake with bad luck, but that is my experience.

Good Luck(Whatever that is},

Ken P.

GinnyTosken

Hi, Jo!

"If you think pushing 40 is bad, try dragging it!"
(Can't remember who said that.)

The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie is one of my favorite books and movies. The underlying theme of totalitarianism and her efforts to mold the minds of little girls reminds me of JW days.

"Prime" is a very arbitrary label. Jane Austen didn't publish her first novel until she was 36. You have wisdom and insight now that you didn't have in your 20's. What might be prime for one person may not be prime for you.

Feeling old has a lot to do with attitude and cultural conditioning. When I visited Norway, I was surprised to see women in their 70's and 80's using foot sleds to go to and from the grocery store. Other folks in their 70's were riding bikes. Where I live, most people this age will not even venture outdoors in icy weather.

I think, too, of the Delaney sisters, who wrote Having Our Say. Both of them were over 100, doing yoga, and very feisty!

I don't think your tiredness is old age; you are probably simply burnt out and drained from the life you've been leading. Allow yourself some time to rest and to do things that truly interest you, and your vitality and energy will return.

Ginny

JanH

Jo, phyiscally, the mid 20s may well be our prime, but face it, at that age we're barely adults. We live in a time and age that idolizes youth and at the same time holds it in contempt. But our idea of age were formed in earlier times, when human lifespan was much shorter and health far worse. When we're 40, it's realistic to expect to still have more than half our lives ahead of us. And considering the stupid thing we did when we were young (like being members of cults), isn't it good to have some experience to help us makes our lives better from now on? The adult life has just started at 40.

People mostly make the best intellectual achievments late in life. Some started brilliant careers after 50 or 60. Most are more financially secure in this stage. Health permitting (and considering a friend recently passed away at 30, nobody has guarantees at any stage in life) few things would be attainable at 25 that isn't even more so at 55.

- Jan
--
"Doctor how can you diagnose someone with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and then act like I had some choice about barging in here right now?" -- As Good As It Gets

ianao

JanH:

...considering a friend recently passed away at 30

Sorry to hear that. Kind of sobering to read at 28.

Andee

Hi Jo,

Welcome to the board!

I agree that it sounds more like burn-out, than being just plain tired.

I was pushing 40 too, then it happened, it shoved me right back! Just in October. However, you know what? I'm still standing, stronger than ever!

Love to read your story sometime. What brought you here?

Andee

Mum

Jo,

I'm in my 50's now, but feel more energetic and alive than ever before. My daughter and I had a conversation about how "ill" I always felt when I was young. My very wise daughter said, "But, Mom, you weren't allowed to say you were just miserable and living an inauthentic life!"

Welcome to the board. Welcome to freedom. Welcome to lots to look forward to!

Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix

Seeker4

Welcome Jo,

Your prime, especially in this culture, is just starting. I figure it runs from maybe 35 to 65. Some folks will stretch that considerably longer, others will be old farts at 29.

The tiredness is just being worn out in an organization that wears you out and tosses you away. What a great life you have ahead of you now. Use each day the best that you can. It's simply wondrous.

Pierced Angel, I'd be interested in your response to the thread I started over in the Sex, Marriage and Relationships section. I think it's called Two Sex Questions or something similar. Your quest for wildness is one I fully understand - though I seem to have followed through on it a bit more than you did! Left the JWs and grabbed life by the balls, figuratively speaking!

S4

Past my prime and now I'm tired

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