Falling Asleep at Assemblies (page 2)

flipper

LOUBELLE- I used to do that ALL the time- fall asleep at meetings and assemblies ! Glad I don't go still or they'd have to take me out on a stretcher ! LOL! I remember one time trying to go to meetings getting reinstated after 4 years out - sitting by myself near the back row - falling asleep during the ministry school , and my Bible constantly falling off my lap onto the floor. I'd wake up a bit , pick it up, then 30 seconds later the same thing would happen ,Bible falls on the floor, I'd pick it up , put it back on my lap, and repeat ! LOL! Finally I'd stay awake a bit more when watching sister old fart self righteous , shaking her head in a expression of disgust after having repeated this like 5 times ! It was funny as hell ! But hey- I worked nights - at least I was attending ! Enjoying it as well ! Especially the slumber ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

Frequent_Fader_Miles

Oh, how I remember those days.

Fighting off a sweet sleep, all the while wishing my bed was close by. Zzzzzzzzzz I used to try my best occupying my mind with other things as I periodically checked my program for the closeness of the closing song and prayer.

Tired of the Hypocrisy

After lunch I always wanted to sleep. But my mom or dad would always nudge me. When I grew up I still wanted to sleep but couldn't because of the stupid TALKER! Raising and lowering tone, pitch and volume on purpose to rouse any sleepy heads. Goddamn Talking Talkers!! I managed to fall asleep once at the cow palace in san Francisco after a sleepless night at the Airport Holiday inn with my newborn son. Right after lunch I dosed off before they even stood to sing. I slept through the keynote talk and even this talking TALKER couldn't rouse me. I was almost knocked off my seat by my pissed off wife because I had been farting like a machine gun! LOL No one around me could keep a straight face. It was a good idea I had to not sit with our own congo!

ANother time som whiny little milksop kid was asleep. He was around 5 years old and our 7 year old son had been chewing a big wad of bubble gum. The usher had nagged us about the gum since the beginning of the session and I told him to leave us alone. It was keeping the little bugger quiet so he should bug off. well after three times of nagging he came over again with the bubble gum police and with his little can in his his hand he demanded that I tell my son to get rid of his gum. Our son was mad because it was just getting to that super soft and still sweet stage and now he had to spit it out. He took outt he gum and was making a try at getting the gum into brother asslicker's can when he got this look on his face. I laughed because i knew it meant nothing good. He changed direction with the gum and planted it squarely on the head of the sleeping little milksop who was sitting in front of him!!!

The littel whiner woke up and didn't realize it for a moment, then he felt it and tried to get it off. He made a mess and a half with his hair. His mom was livid and started to bitch at my wife about it while me and his dad just laughed. The asslicker was all mad too! LOL The sister told my wife she was an awful mother and my wife called her a dumb bitch.....

ninja

I fell asleep at the meeting one time........bit embarrassing as I was giving the 4th talk....Ithankyou......I'll be here all week

logic

I finally realized that by sleeping at the meeting I was finally making good use of my time.

PrimateDave

I fell asleep all the time. I also took my Gameboy, binoculars, and entertaining magazines and books. My reasoning: no one was paying me to be there, so I could do what I wanted as long as it didn't disturb anyone else.

Dave

BONEZZ

The trick is to paint wide open eyeballs on your eyelids so it looks like you're awake while you're snoozing away.

-BONEZZ

stillajwexelder

during the Public Talk on a Sunday was a great time for a little nap

brinjen

I don't think there was a single assembly I attended where I didn't fall asleep. It was always the same dream too. I'd be dreaming that I was at home in front of the tv watching a really crappy show. I'd think to myself I may as well go to bed and be comfortable. Then I'd wake up. Crap!

Falling Asleep at Assemblies