Email to JW wife...

by kzjw 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • kzjw
    kzjw

    The battle rages on, I sent this letter to try to give support...What do you think?

    OK, I'm done with the _____thing...but I took the option to participate in going to the KH with you. I making an effort, but at times you turn away from my questions and you'd never do that to a "book study". I know I only do the Public Talk, but it's an effort I made hoping to learn more about you spiritually.There's a difference between one's spirituality and one's religion...Therefore, I made a mistake in how I participated in the meetings...I approached it from a spritual perspective, which to me means that God's word is all anyone ever needs. If it does not come from the Bible, then it cannot be at peace with my conciense and beliefs. I believe Jesus died for my sins, God is omnipresent, gave me His message, free will and maybe tomorrow. Beyond that, I nor anyone else on earth can promise me anything. Period. Back to my mistake...In the very beginning of your return to the truth, I was opposed, but silent, because of JW stereotypes I had developed over the years, there I said it. But I also realized the main reason you went back to what was perfectly natural and right for you, was because I failed as the leader when we were going to church. Not that I think going baptist would have worked for us either. Strangely, over time and not wanting to go to church alone and without family, I withdrew from religion alltogether! Tthink about it, I barely touched a Bible for over a decade? Wow! Though I withdrew from religion, I still prayed to my Father and kept my spiritual closeness through His grace and mercy . He has sustained and kept me safe for nearly half a century, kept me faithful in our marriage and I've tried to live in a christian light. Though I'm not part of a religion, I am a very spritual person. The time I've recently spent reading the Bible still feels very familiar, like "home". When I'm reading certain verses, I actually have a total recall of the first time I read it, and that feels good to me spritually. I also spend time studying your publications and though I do see some truths, I know I am capable of finding them independently and soley through my Bible. Would you agree I spent a lot of time learning about what your religion teaches? I know you claim I have "motives" and sometimes I do, but it's also because I want to know you better spritually. Surely you've realized you're more than just a JW? You have free will, you're someone who has thier own ideas, right? You should never be afraid of your ideas. Without fear, your good ideas will thrive and bad ideas will die. Fear of thinking on your own, discussing issues, or questioning authority is the worst kind of slavery, and leads to slavery of all sorts. Free will means we choose...Choose to believe what we will. These will almost never be the same, but we are not so far apart that we can't find and share our own spirituality. Like Mo always says "We are closer than you think." You have to understand that my focus started with the organization because I've seen the falsehoods of catholicism, protestants and even the muslims, so I looked at it's history very carefully. I've spent time at your KH, and I do enjoy the Public Talk, the Friends are really nice and I like them. I trully mean that. The problem is that as a self proclaimed "organization" the wt history shows that prophecies were made by the organization, and those prophecies were not fullfilled. I had a problem there because God's law speaks on prophets very clearly in Deuteronomy 18 (click link) http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=deut%2018:18-24;&version=9 ; If those verses are true, and the organization did make an unfullfilled prophesy...what would Jesus do? Would you do likewise? I know you tell me to back off and that you've got it, and I'm really OK with you as a Witness...but just be very careful making important decisions based on what the WTS tells you. Take everything with a grain of salt and don't be afraid to question anything - use the Internet, all information is not critical of the Witnesses! I've found JW-friendly sites, I'd love to share with you, they've helped me understand that there are JW's and people like me, who ask questions. The WT discourages any research outside of what the WTS provides, but these people have free will, and they use it! They are still JW's and believe a lot of what traditional JW's believe. I gave you the CD of future Watchtowers through the end of August for a reason. Think about it. Why publish a "private" edition of the Watchtower for Witnesses only? What is the main focus of the collective theme of this study guide? Why are they consolidating the meetings? Do you ever ask a question about a doctrine to yourself that you don't dare repeat to a friend or ask an elder? Or even me? It really is OK to ask... I love you, I feel your spirituality and it is beautiful...I've seen you make wonderful independent strides...I want to see you take it to a higher level, a spiritual level. I want to bring about a more positive connection for us, so you have to start to let me into your religion without fear. I can't turn you away from it, nor would I even if I could. I just want "US"... I love you

  • Quirky1
    Quirky1

    kzjw - Very good letter. I hope one day to do the same with my wife.

  • 83501nwahs
    83501nwahs

    You are way too genrous. You know of course that she will never write you that kind of letter, right? You are an apostate and therefore evil. She will never tell you your spirituality is "beautiful."

  • *summer*
    *summer*

    You reached out in a beautiful way.

    Will your wife read and "absorb" your message? Only time will tell.

    But a seed has been planted. And sometimes, that is all it takes...

    Keep the faith.

  • ninja
    ninja

    you've inspired me to write a wee message to my wife........see what you think...."rub a dub dub...you're still a dub"

  • Mr Ben
    Mr Ben

    kzjw You are doing the right thing by following your desire to help her and tell her how much you love her. You seem like a decent guy. You just continue to do what you feel is good, and let her respond accordingly, but remember she has two personalities - the real her and the cult her. Only time will tell which personality will win, and you must decide how much time you can give her. Life is short.

    Sometimes things work out as you hope, sometimes not. I wish you luck.

  • Eliveleth
    Eliveleth

    kzjw,

    Anything done out of love is bound to have an effect on another person. I feel your love for your wife

    in this letter. She may be afraid to respond to you in like manner because of her religion, but she

    cannot help but be affected.

    Just continue to love her. I noticed in your profile that your marital problems go beyond the WT.

    There is a book out there that might help, it is called "The Five Love Languages". It helps identify

    how a person feels love. It is not the same for all of us.

    If you learn what her needs are it is easier to meet them. I will be praying for you both

    Hang in there, keep showing her that you love her. Time will tell.

    Velta

  • kzjw
    kzjw

    Well, a week later, I get the response...

    First of all let me say I wasn't stonewalling...you have a way of surprising me I wasn't expectng that but in a way was. You seem to be so determine that I know the ins and out of the WTS. All I know is my eyes are open, I'm not walking around in a fog & if it doesn't feel right to me I know how to ask questions. Yes free will does exist with me, as with so many others, yes some in the Hall are more zealous than others. I'm one who's observed the working of things, you may not know it but I'm aware of more then you think. Somethings I can't answer for you,you seem to have all the answers to your questions anyway! All I can say is Jehovah revealed himself to some of the first century christians, not in a literal sense, but in talking to them like Adam,Moses,Abraham. Today we have the Faithful and Distreet Slave Class who supply us with spiritual food (Matt chapter 24) I know you don't follow this but I do. I truly appreciate all that you are doing to keep me inform of the working within the WTS. I follow the teaching of the Bible were we are commanded by Jesus Matt 28:19,20 this is what Jesus did as foretold in Mark chapter 1. We're commision to preach the word, and maybe what's going on in WTS will be revealed in Jehovah own due time because he brings everything to the light. Lets try to build on this relationship, I feel target in my own home not comfortable to read my Bible,Rev bk or listen to my cds...thats not good. My religion has afforded me peace of mind to cope with a trouble heart, but now I can't find that inner peace that I so desperately need. I want to try to save this marriage but I need for you to leave all the WTS alone, and let me find my joy in serving Jehovah and his son Jesus Christ. I'm all over the place, thinking is scattered... just trying to get everything together in my head... have to sort it out before I speak because worde are lkie weapons they wound you.James chapter 1:19,20) so thats all for now. Agape

    Do I continue...or back down?

  • sacolton
    sacolton

    Back down.

    She'll continue building a wall around herself until she starts thinking on her own.

  • *summer*
    *summer*

    Seems to me the lady needs some breathing space big time! Her mind is obviously torn and hard at work right now.

    Do not give up on her, but give her some time...

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