I need someone to talk to..

by littleblueuk 33 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Mr. Majestic

  Hello Littleblue,

  Thank you for sharing your story. An alarm bell went off in my head while reading through what you had to say. I am so sorry that you are feeling so down about everything.

  But please keep on sharing what you are going through. Sounds like you have a lot of pent up emotions and might need a little help in dealing with them.

  Just to comment on something that your mum asked of you. She asked you not to mention about the ‘negative’ of the truth, but she will be bombarding her with the 'positive'. I don’t see that as a balanced perspective. There are always 2 sides to a story as the saying goes.

  But please keep talking to us. PM me if you feel the need. I’m very understanding………

  Keep in there…….

  Mr.M
• 

  Sirona

  Hugs

  Sorry you're feeling this way.

  I would say that going on the cruise would probably be a good idea. Just speak to your mother first and have a rule where religion isn't discussed. Say you won't make negative comments as long as she doesn't mention it - so you can all have a good time.

  As for your sister, simply encourage her to look at both sides of the story. Don't be too negative, just remind her that the "truth" should be able to stand up to scrutiny and alternative views and if she still decides to return you will accept her decision.

  As for suicide, I would strongly suggest speaking to someone about your feelings. A counsellor can help you talk without judgement and simply "get it all out". I see a counsellor and I think its a great thing to do.

  Sirona
• 

  LovesDubs

  Welcome honey. First things first...your leaving the planet isnt going to prove anything. Your mother will probably just look at that act as one of guilt and that you were afraid for God to kill you at Armageddon so you beat Him to the punch. Seriously...you know thats the way they and WE thought about things. Its like they are looking through this distorted wacked glass at things all the time. So stick around and live your life WELL and that will be the best revenge against the Borg.

  The Society divides families...no doubt about it. And we are all praying the day will come when they and their Pharasaic laws go phuque off and die...but until then, your sister might be making noise that she wants to go back but ask anybody who tried to do that and see how successful they were. Once that door closes behind them nothing is the same again. And nobody trusts them again...so they are categorized differently within the ranks as bad association. My guess is even if she got reinstated, she wouldnt stay long. She knows too much.

  So just hang around and be supportive of her and the opportunities will arise for you to interject logic and thought once in awhile that make her think. Dont leave her to the wiles of your mother. Go on the cruise...its a BIG ship sweetie. :)

  And write to us...often

  LD
• 

  Quirky1

  First of all Welcome to the board!

  I'm sorry you are going thru this but they meant it when they said "The TRUTH Hurts".It divides families.

  Put your cruise ticket on e-bay if you don't want to go.
• 

  Octarine Prince

  One problem many ex-JWs have is that they don't stick to the facts. Facts first.
  
  Don't speak negatively of the Witnesses. Relate facts about them. Some of the facts are negative. *smile*
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  Maybe the cruise will give you a chance to talk to your sister.

  You can gently point out negative comments that your Mom may come up with, by taking apart what your Mom is saying.

  Sometimes jw's can dig themselves into a hole without even knowing it. It could turn out in your favor.

  Thumbs up to Hubert's thoughts. Go, no matter how you feel.
  Your mother will cause her own problems with the words she says.
  You can be there to dissect Mom's horrible comments and bond with
  your sister. You may help Mom if you help Sis. Just be as well-behaved
  as you can be, letting Mom look irrational on her own.

  Also, as painful as it is, Mom is a victim of a mind-control cult. She thinks
  she is doing the right thing, even when it's the worst things to do and say.
  I recommend Steve Hassan's two books to start educating yourself:
  COMBATTING CULT MIND CONTROL
  RELEASING THE BONDS

  (at freedomofmind.com or at Amazon)
• 

  littleblueuk

  Thank you, everyone, for being so kind.

  No, I was never baptised, although my sister was. I never bought into it. I guess I was too smart. I was the one who always asked impossible questions and got everyone in a tizzy. It was like jigsaw puzzle with a thousand different pieces. Nothing seemed to fit.

  I don't know about the cruise...the thought of spending a week in the same cabin with those two makes me think a bath with 100 hungry pirhanas is a better option.

  I've thought about going back to counseling but I can't seem to find a counselor that I can relate to. The only people who seem to understand me are ex-JWs, especially the ones who have grown up this way.

  I've stopped blaming my mother and father (although he's useless) a long time ago. I realise that's not productive and as an adult, you have to choose your own path, but sometimes I wonder, just sometimes, how would I be if I were raised normally? Would I suffer the severe depression that I do, the failure in relationships that I have that seem to plague me?

  I still have three weeks to think about it. I'll see how things are, I guess.
• 

  james_woods

  That sounds better - glad to hear some sense of humor coming back...
• 

  Princess Daisy Boo

  Little Blue,

  I have a Mom and Dad and sister that I barely talk to. I feel you pain hon, PM me if you like!

  Love

  PDB
• 

  TJ - iAmCleared2Land

  Littleblue,

  I'm very sorry you're going through this. It's obvious you love your sister (and your Mom, even though she's frustrating you with her demands).

  I couldn't help thinking two things as I read your post, about your Mom's request. If she expects you to not say anything "negative about the Truth", and to "let your sister make up her own mind", then it's only fair that your mother should agree to likewise say "nothing POSITIVE about the Truth", and "let your sister make up her own mind."

  I suggest, if you have the opportunity, of using their own "burning building" illustration on her, kindly. It's one they understand. "If your friend or neighbor's home was on fire, would you just stand by and watch it burn? No!! You'd be compelled by your knowledge to sound a warning, and you'd be morally reprehensible if you didn't!" You have as much of a moral obligation to sound a warning to your sister about what you know, as your Mom thinks she has to share what she thinks she knows.

  Hugs to you...

  ~ TJ

  P.S.--Stay here with us... leaving hurts.