Funerals = JW infomercials

by Lady Zombie 24 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  Lady Zombie

  My heart goes out to you, Buckster. This damned religion damages and destroys so many people. Further evidence is how their adherents behave during sensitive times such as funerals.

  When one of my grandfathers (a JW) passed away, the brother giving the eulogy said that he (my grandfather) "wasn't as important as the work he did" (meaning his life as a JW). I was sitting in the second row and gave him such a angry look that he started stammering and desperatly tried to backpeddle.

  He avoided me like the plague afterwards.
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  Alexia

  I remember there was a brother in my congregation that worked for UPS that was robbed and murdered on the job. It was a pretty high-profile case in the news and hundreds of people from his job, the community and several media/news organizations came with their cameras, etc to the memorial. Besides the fact that he left a wife and two young kids, nothing else was said about his life during the service. I was embarrassed and ashamed and this was years before I realized the Borg is a scam.
• 

  Alexia

  I remember there was a young brother in my congregation that worked for UPS and was robbed and murdered on the job. It was a pretty high-profile case in the news and hundreds of people from his job, the community and several media/news organizations came with their cameras, etc to the memorial. Besides the fact that he left a wife and two young kids, nothing else was said about his life during the service. I was embarrassed and ashamed and this was years before I realized the Borg is a scam.
• 

  Velvetann

  I was totally disgusted when I discovered what JW funerals were all about. I had never gone to one while I was a JW, so had no idea what I was up against when I did go.

  You hit the nail on the head and the term "infomercial" is THE PERFECT way to describe JW funerals.

  My experience with JW infomercial funeral came when my Dad died in Dec 2001. He had been zealous in the truth for years and a elder, special pioneer etc and then he saw what was going on and he just up and quit the "truth". So he was unofficially DA for 25 years. My Mom was totally still in and insisted that we give him a JW funeral. I said OK but not at the Kingdom Hall so she agreed to that thank Goodness and we had the service at the Funeral Parlour. She didn't object I think because she wasn't sure if my Dads funeral would have been allowed at the sacred Hall anyway. Then she talked Ernie Funk from Canada Bethel to give the talk as he and my parents went way back to the 50's in the truth together. My husband and I decided to do a Eulogy for my Dad (thankfully) and I did a collage of photos of his life and family. I was not experienced with funerals so just trusted that things would be to say good bye to my Dad and talk about him.

  So the funeral began and I had my children there, my exhusband, My current husband at that time and friends of my childrens family and some of our business colleages there (all who were not JW's and some not knowing about them).. Well were we in for a shock, It was a total infomercial, and my fathers name was maybe mentioned 2 times but it was like we weren't there about him. Scripture after Scripture and a lot of them subtlly referring to the fact that my Dad might not have a resurrection hope. I was so embarrassed and bored. My Mom sat beside me, not a tear in her eye and she was so happy having A Bethel Brother giving a talk for her husband. She had her bible and looked up every scripture as he read them. I was so disgusted. After Ernies talk he introduced my husband and said he would give a Eulogy, Well that was all about my Dad and he did a good job. Afterward a lot of people even JW's came up and complimented Robert on his Eulogy, and a lot said that if it hadn't been for the Eulogy we wouldn't have know we were there about my Dad.

  One more thing...When I told my Mom that I wanted to do a Eulogy for my Dad but that Robert my husband would give it as he was a good speaker she said she would have to check with Ernie to see if that is OK. Unbelievable, its her husband and she is paying for the funeral and she has to ask the Bethel God if her daughter can give a Eulogy. Well I didn't make a big fuss but I was seething inside. I had to speak to him (Mr. Holier than thou Ernie) on the phone at my Moms and he instructed me what I couldn't say. I had to fax the Eulogy over to Ernie at Bethel and wait for him to critique it. He had told me we couldn't say any thing religious against the JW's or say that he might go to heaven. I told him he didn't need to worry my husband and I are not religious so its going to be all about my DAD. He approved the thing but Geeeeeesh I just thought it was absolutely crazy.

  Ok now I got that off my chest and I feel better too that I wasn't the only one that had to go throught this kind of fiasco.

  My Mom died in October 2006. I am the only child and was exector so I arranged the funeral. I let the JW's give the talk but I told them that NO WAY would they do all that scriptures stuff. I said talk about my MOM and I gave him a limit of 2 scriptures. He did it and it was very nice funeral talk. It was nice to be in control for a change with them.

  Thanks for listening

  Velvetann
• 

  james_woods

  And, Alexia - these people are so dysfunctional that the speaker was probably just about to break his arm (patting himself on the back) for sticking it to all those worldly heathens with such a fine "witnessing".

  However, from my time on the inside - I truly believe that somewhere between 1/3 to 1/2 of all basic good witnesses find the way the funeral is used as a soapbox for the religion to be an embarrassment.

  It is really only the true die-hards (or blow-hards, if you will) who actually think this infomercial funeral habit is any kind of good thing, or even in good taste. IMHO.
• 

  Seeker4

  Went to a funeral for a brother with the talk given by one of his best friends of like 60 years. I thought how nice it would be to hear about this bro from someone who knew him so well.
  
  Well, it was awful. The elder giving the talk, no shit, read 22 verses in 20 minutes, and said essentially nothing about the dead man. Afterward, the dead brother's daughter came up to me, and said, "Wasn't that a wonderful talk?" I just stared at her, and I saw this look of shock and sadness go across her face, as I think she also knew that the talk was a horrible one, and I wouldn't say otherwise.
  
  S4
• 

  tfjw

  Good for you Velvetann!
  
  At every JW funeral I've gone to the "talk" has been almost the same cookie cutter one.
  
  I did have an interesting one I went to once. Before everyone left the chapel at the funeral home the elder who gave the talk said, "There will be no graveside service but you are welcome to come to the cemetary but it's not necessary." Well EVERYONE showed up and while we were assembling this one elder told the one in charge, "I thought you said these idiots didn't need to come out here." Right away one of the non-JWs daughters of the lady who died walked right over to him because she heard what was said and told him off in front of over 200 people (I won't repeat what she said - but I will say it was some of the most "colorful" language I ever heard). He was red as a tomato.
  
  Even though I was "in" at the time, I loved what she did. It was totally disrespectful of that elder to have said what he did.
  
  When my mother died I was already out and we didn't allow a JW "funeral" to take place. I told my wife when we were making the arrangements, "My mother is more important than their propaganda!"
• 

  BabaYaga

  VelvetAnn, you are my hero, Woman. Thank you for interceding on your loved one's behalf. That rocks.
  
  Cheers to you,
  Baba.
• 

  Poztate

  For Newbies that haven't seen the talk outline.....

  FUNERAL DISCOURSE

  REMARKS REGARDING THE DECEASED (Use any that apply and are appropriate.)

  Details regarding age, birth, when married, and so forth

  By whom the deceased is survived

  Dedication record, including privileges of service

  Exemplary qualities displayed by the deceased (Eccl. 7:1)

  THE HOPE THE DECEASED ENTERTAINED

  Worshiped Jehovah, the God of wisdom, justice, love, power

  Had faith in Jesus Christ (Acts 4:12)

  Appreciated God's purpose regarding earth (Gen. 1:28)

  Sure to be realized (Isa. 11:9; 55:10, 11; Rev. 21:4)

  Why good people die

  Disobedience of Adam (-Gen. 3:19; contrast with Genesis 2:7.)

  Offspring inherited death (Rom. 5:12)

  Condition of the dead

  Soul is mortal (Ezek 18:4, 20)

  Dead are unconscious (Ps. 146:4; Eccl. 3:19; 9:5, 10)

  The resurrection hope

  Made possible by sacrifice of Jesus Christ (Matt. 20:28)

  Christ's resurrection a guarantee (1 Cor. 15:22, 23)

  God uses Jesus to raise the dead (John 5:28, 29)

  For the anointed, resurrection is to heavenly life (1 Cor. 15:51-54; Rev. 20:4, 6)

  "Other sheep" resurrected to life in earthly Paradise (Luke 23:43; John 10:16)

  Armageddon survivors can hope to see the deceased one again soon

  Others too are in line for resurrection (Ads 24:15)

  WHY IT IS GOOD TO GO TO HOUSE OF MOURNING

  Can comfort the bereaved; loss is mutual

  Take to heart uncertainty of life (Ps. 90:12; Eccl. 7:2)

  Makes us think about how we are using our life

  HOW WE CAN BENEFIT FROM BEING HERE

  While living, make good name with Jehovah God (Eccl. 7:1)

  Lay up treasures in heaven (Matt. 6:19-21)

  One way is to take zealous part in witness work, if qualified (Matt. 24:14; 28:19, 20)

  In this way and by godly conduct, we contribute to sanctification of Jehovah's name

  (Prov. 27:11)

  Resurrection hope an incentive to learn and do divine will(l Cor. 15:58)

  (Note: Instead of eulogizing the deceased, use the material in this outline to give a fine witness

  concerning the truth. Good balance should be observed in this regard. Doctrinal points can be

  presented as beliefs of the deceased, which served as motivation for him. Purpose of talk is to

  uphold Jehovah God as a God of love and mercy and at the same time bring comfort to the

  bereaved. Use of a song such as No. 102 (53) or 187 (93) is optional. A brief prayer at the close

  is fitting When arrangement is made to go to the grave, it is well to consider quite briefly the

  hope through the Kingdom, reading one or two scriptures, such as Job 14:14, 15 and

  1 Corinthians 15:5413-57. This service may also be closed with prayer, thanking Jehovah for

  the resurrection hope, which is of great comfort. The talk need not exceed 30 minutes.)

  I had to speak to him (Mr. Holier than thou Ernie) on the phone at my Moms and he instructed me what I couldn't say. I had to fax the Eulogy over to Ernie at Bethel and wait for him to critique it. He had told me we couldn't say any thing religious against the JW's or say that he might go to heaven. I told him he didn't need to worry my husband and I are not religious so its going to be all about my DAD. He approved the thing but Geeeeeesh I just thought it was absolutely crazy.

  I knew Ernie from years ago (not that well) He was always a company man through and through. It was ALL about the WT never about the person..
• 

  Poztate

  Dammm...Killed another thread....