The practice of "Shepherding Calls" (attention ex-elders)

by Lady Zombie 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Lady Zombie
    Lady Zombie

    The practice of "Shepherding Calls" has always been somewhat of a mystery to me.

    Growing up, a shepherding call was for JWs who were doing something that a few/some/most (didn't matter which) found stumbling or suspicious. For instance, I remember my folks gossiping to each other about a JW couple who had been sloughing off the meetings in order to go dancing. One of the congregation members (who were absent themselves on a particular night) saw them going into a dance club on a meeting night and promptly ran to an elder. Keep in mind, except for missing meetings, the couple was in good standing. Anyway, after a shepherding call, the defeated couple made sure to make it to all the meetings.

    Through all the years I've been associated, shepherding calls were for naughty JWs but who weren't quite naughty enough to have a JC formed. If an elder came up to you after a meeting and asked if he and another brother could stop by sometime to chat, you knew you were in for it.

    I have had several attempts at being "shepherded" throughout my life. I was not missing any meetings, commenting, looking "happy", and all that crap, and was periodically approached for a shepherding call. Each time I refused. The look on the faces of the elders told me that although they couldn't do anything to force the issue, they were going to watch me all that more closely.

    I got angry and talked to my father. I demanded to know why it was that they're so dead set giving me a shepherding call. I wasn't (technically) doing anything wrong. My father assured me that it was "routine" and that "everyone regardless got shepherding calls" and how he and my mother get shepherding calls.

    I'm not calling my father a liar, but bullsh*t. Good JWs who are toeing the line do not need "shepherding." So I know damn well that they only reason they're so adamant about the issue with me is that they would dearly love to find something about me to pounce on.

    I'm not well liked amongst proper JWs. I have a secular education (obtained while being a JW), I live alone, I'm independent, I don't socialize too much with the JWs, and I don't have that blank look to my eyes. I'm sure they're positive that if they come into my house, they'll find 8 million things in which to disfellowship me right there on the spot. Hahaha, I'm sure they would, but I can tell the mere thought of uncovering some horrible sinful thing has them absolutely salivating!

    So, am I right to think that shepherding calls happen when you're on their radar? Or, am I mistaken and everyone gets them, as my father states.

    Oh, by the way, I have a *gasp!* illegal copy of "Pay Attention To Yourselves And To All The Flock." I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but through JWD, I found Wikileaks and downloaded it from there. Which pages deal with this issue?

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    One of my former congregations made it a point to do shepherding calls on everyone a couple of times a year. This was advised by the CO. My ex and I were visited a few times and no real "counsel" was given. I suspect these visits were investigative in nature. That particular hall had a lot of DFings, and I suspect they wanted to keep a close eye on everyone. I remember comments on the size of our "theocratic library" as well as a few raised eyebrows when they saw books on science and technology. While they were talking to us and reading scriptures, their eyes were constantly travelling around the room instead of looking at us.

    W

  • sir82
    sir82

    In theory, elders should make shepherding calls on every member of the congregation regularly, not just when they are "in trouble".

    In practice, a lot of elders just can't be bothered with it, and only go if forced to, i.e., when someone is "on their radar.

  • james_woods
    james_woods

    I cannot remember for sure, but did not the elders get to count time for this? If still so - I would bet that the sheperding call would become very, very popular.

    I was only an elder for a very few years (assistant congregation servant before) prior to leaving - but I think in the early elder days the "sheperding call" was only for people who obviously had missed meetings or did not turn in time.

    Anything of a behavioural nature would warrant a committee.

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    They want to hound. If you are not pioneering, they want to find out why. If you are doing something that is not along the strictest Washtowel guidelines or is impeding in their getting the absolute maximum field circus, they want a stop put to it. If you are spending too much time at Starbucks (or tipping the poor waitress with anything other than a waste of paper), they also want it stopped so you can do more field circus and put all the money in the Worldwide Pedophile Defense Fund.

    Let them hound me like that, and they will be listening to Christmas carols, and I don't care what time of year it is.

  • Lady Zombie
    Lady Zombie

    Hmmm. Ok. Still though, I don't want any JW (besides the folks) in my house, just on the principal.

    I think I would lose my temper if I saw them looking all over the place while they were talking to me.

    WHAT SCRIPTURAL PRINCIPAL AM I VIOLATING WITH THIS SILK FLOWER ARRANGEMENT, BROTHERS?!

    THAT PRINT YOU'RE EYEBALLING IS 'THE LADY OF SHALOT' BY WATERHOUSE! YES, HE PAINTED A LOT OF MYTHOLOGICAL CHARACTERS.

    YES, THOSE ARE ASTRONOMY, BIOLOGY, PSYCHOLOGY, AND PHYSICS SCIENCE BOOKS THERE ON THAT BOOKSHELF. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BORROW ONE?!

    PISS OFF!

    See, that's why I don't want them over.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free
    I think I would lose my temper if I saw them looking all over the place while they were talking to me.

    Actually, I was pretty ticked when one elder saw an AutoCAD book on my shelf. He asked if I had the software and would I give him a copy.

    Grrrrr! I don't spend a ton of money on software just so I can turn around and give it away for free.

    W

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    SHEPHERDING IN THE U.S., 2008. (As I see it.)

    It mainly depends on the "hard-working" elder to publisher ratio as well as the number of competent Ministerial Servants.

    If an average-sized congo (70-100 pubs) has over a dozen usable elders and plenty of MSs to handle the crap jobs as well as meeting parts, they might just decide to shepherd everybody on a regular basis. But that is "Leave it to Beaver" dreamland. It is not the norm for California, nor the rest of the US, IMO.

    Here's a more typical situation:

    90 publishers
    7 elders
    5 Ministerial Servants

    Looks fairly good on paper. But then you look closer.

    2 of the elders are elderly and in poor health and are not able to do much.

    1 of the elders has teenagers who are smoking pot and fornicating and he's just beginning to figure it out and/or admit it. He tried "stepping down" but got arm-twisted into staying, but still isn't very available for congo stuff.

    1 of the elders has a depressed wife who takes up all of his time.

    So now we're down to 3 elders who are "theoretically" available for shepherding.

    Here's the sad part. These three guys are hard-core true believers with perhaps a bit of ego mania thrown in on top. Their personal lives are probably just as messed up as the rest of the "limited" elders but they won't admit it. So their families get ignored while they try to "shepherd the flock".

    This is closer to normal, IMO.

    In this kind of situation, it's like you said in your original post: Only people who are on the threshold of a JC get "shepherded".

    My $.02.

    om

  • Lady Zombie
    Lady Zombie
    In this kind of situation, it's like you said in your original post: Only people who are on the threshold of a JC get "shepherded".

    AH-HA!

    Those bastads will never take me alive!

    I'm going to keep them running around, sneaking, and peaking and chasing their own tails.

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    Yes, elders are supposed to "shepherd" everyone in the congregation about once per year.

    The whole thing can be rather bizzare and contradicting. Those walking the line should certainly be shepherded about whatever issue. Everyone should be shepherded so nobody feels neglected if they don't have issues. There was never an "official procedure" for doing it. Many congregations posted schedules of which Book Study was to be shepherded and by which elders. Then a letter went out to BoE about not doing that and not telling someone it was shepherding. It was just arranging to drop in for a "visit". Um okay. It was supposed to be somehow secret shepherding. Informal but in a tie.

    That was so odd we were constantly back and forth at the COs visit. Kinda like:

    CO: What is your shepherding arrangement?
    BoE: "Um, it's not supposed to be 'shepherding' anymore, it's just 'visites' and it's not supposed to be formally scheduled."
    CO: "You're all idiots for understanding the letter that way! Do it this way!...."

    Then, he'd give some explanation that visit on how he wanted it done. Next visit, it would come up again and however it was being done was wrong and needed to be changed. Now, we kinda fake it like this:

    CO: What is your shepherding arrangement?
    BoE: It's great. We shepherd everybody every 6 months! The friends love it.
    CO: Good. Anybody considered for appointment?
    BoE: Nope. Nobody is reaching out.
    CO: Great. Let's meet the wives at Applebee's for dessert!
    BoE: Yeah!

    Okay, the ending is a stretch. But much has been at the local and particularly CO discretion. They act like "shepherding" prevents problems. Wrong. It's ackward to go on one. What to talk to the publishers about? "So, you been smoking dope or anything?" If they're chipper and talkative, it's usually easy. Just shoot the breeze for an hour, maybe they'll have cookies. Often, they're wondering what's up and the elder just wants to get it done. So, we stare at their books, artwork, silk flowers, whatever. As much as I can enjoy socializing, the 'shepherding' thing was weird.

    No, can't count your time unless they're unbaptized. But hey, I always pad my time anyway.

    B the X

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