Routine for everyone in all the congs I've been in. In practice some book study overseers are much better at keeping up with visits than others. Thankfully ours is hopeless.
The practice of "Shepherding Calls" (attention ex-elders)
by Lady Zombie 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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BluesBrother
When I was an elder I made a point of shepherding the group as I was able to. It is the first thing to be shelved though when something crops up so it is hard to keep it regular.
Shepherding the OK ones was good, I would try and get them talking rather than deliver a pep talk they did not want or need. BTW I could count on one hand the calls my faithful wife has had in recent years..They don't want to be bothered these days.
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AllTimeJeff
Shepherding as I was taught it was supposed to be about everyone. But to be sure, when the elders got together, we always concentrated with those who were weak. (i.e. low hours, missing meetings and/or "bad attitude")
We tried calling it a "friendly visit" because shepherding calls have acquired (righrfully so) a negative reputation. And yeah, CO's were always interested in being tough on the subject, to which I learned the unique skill of framing our work and telling them what they needed to hear.
I wouldn't doubt that the elders may want to give you some attention Lady Zombie. They could also be under a lot of pressure from the CO.
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StAnn
Honestly, I've had two shepherding calls in my life, when I was in good standing. Once some brothers had gone to a quick build and came over and shared some pictures and talked about the experience. Another time, some came over because I was single and one of the brothers had recently got married. He was talking about how he knew from experience how difficult it could be to be single and living alone, with no encouragement. It was actually quite pleasant both times. I've never experienced or heard of a shepherding call in my old cong. that was anything but well meaning.
Wow, I actually found something nice to say about the brothers...!
StAnn
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Wasanelder Once
Our PO was a jerk. He took everything he was told and did it verbatim. What a snark. So, we were instructed to tell the ones to be shepherded to read the OM book chapter on endurance and we would discuss it. When you went with the PO he did it just like a bookstudy. What a waste of time. Instead I would just greet everyone and have nice conversation. The goal was to let them speak about what was on their minds. Often we found out who was sick or in need or whatever. Then we would try to provide solutions. I was very unpopular with the PO because I didn't follow his direction to the letter. He's such an ass, finally he moved away and his wife was DF'd and divorced his sorry self exulting a.. . There are few people in this world that I truly HATE and he is number one. Oh, yeah, shepherding. We didn't do it that often because the elders cherished their off time and didn't want to be bothered. W.Once
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lancelink
years ago (1977-1985) my congregation elders would stop by about once a year to just
check on everyone in the congregation, not a guilt session, just a really neat visit.
The last time (2005 ?
new, young elders so full of their "importance and appearance" that I literally got a headache listening to them.
Visits ? try once every 5 years.
There is one married elder that was SO interested / worried about all the young girls age 13-20 that is all he
pays attention to.
If you were thinking about fading. he will pass you off to someone else.
yet if you just happen to be a teenage girl, you have his complete attention 24-7.
And if you are a male in this age group, he looked at them like they were all predators, staring at the young girls and
just thinking of ways to make trouble for the elders.
How people like this become elders in the first place is beyond me, it must be a part of the good old boys club. -
Awakened at Gilead
When I was in my missionary assignment I made sure that I visited all 120 of the friends in their homes in my first year. I wanted to :know the appearance of the flock".
But when I came back from missionary service, no longer with any privileges, no one visited. The elders only made one "shepherding call", and that was in response to my application for pioneering, which they came over to make vain accusations and tell me why they were rejecting the application.
Since then I've had calls when the elders were "worried" about me.
Of course, now that I DAd, they don't bother me anymore.... which is one reason I highly recommend the DA route if you can.
A@G
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treadnh2o
Back in the day I use to go only when the CO was coming around. It sort of felt Like cleaning the house before your spouse gets home from being away for the weekend, you know you better do it because it is less painful than having the conversation about it not being done. Since I stepped down (more like a happy skip) I was "privileged" to be on the receiving end. When these guys came over I called their bluff and told them I knew this was a CYA visit as the CO visit was in 3 weeks. It also really made the less experienced brother uncomfortable as to some of the "higher status" privileges that I had in the past. It's great when when they know you have the tools to climb the corporate ladder yet you tell them. I am really not interested in reaching out-aka don't give a sh*t.
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nondescriptex
Everyone is supposed to get a shepherding call. Depending on the personality of your elders, you can probably continue to politely decline and they might eventually give up.
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DaCheech
Actually, I was pretty ticked when one elder saw an AutoCAD book on my shelf. He asked if I had the software and would I give him a copy.
Grrrrr! I don't spend a ton of money on software just so I can turn around and give it away for free.
happened to me too