Feeling Vulnerable

megs

Okay... Help... I'm feeling weak right now... I haven't spoken to my dub in 6 weeks, still not over him, still thinking about him far more than I should... Anyway... When we were talking, he got me going to meetings (we live in diff places) and a nice pioneer lady took me under her wing. I gave his email addy to the lady and they correspond. So, me and the dub had a falling out when I told him all of the issues I had with the WTS. He won't talk to me... She hadn't emailed me in weeks, I assumed he told her I was a "bad association". So today she emails, asking how I'm doing etc. I desperately want to know how he is, but I'm afraid I'll be playing with fire because I'm a bit vulnerable at the moment and I'm afraid of being sucked in to meetings again... Someone please be my voice of reason and remind me of why this would be a bad thing...

whitman

aawww sweetie....poor thing. Just take some nice deep breaths and make a cup of tea or some other comforting beverage.

You are vulnerable right now, but don't forget that you have an incredible amount of strength for having removed yourself from their influence in the first place. Stay strong, be true to yourself - and just breath. You can do this. I'm right behind you!! Give yourself hugs and kisses from me.

beksbks

Honey I only have a couple of things to say. One, you can live without that man, one day it won't even hurt too much. I know, I ended a 22 year marriage (nothing to do with JW's). After 8 years, I'm fine and I'm glad I did it (engaged to a wonderful man actually).

I have two beautiful, fantastic children, 21 and 23. My greatest relief and accomplishment in life, is that I never exposed them to even one day of JWism. Myself on the other hand, I was born in and I will never be without handicap because of it.

If this is not enough, he will never love you as much as he loves the organization, they won't let him.

whitman

In case you need a stern approach.... 'young lady I do not want you seeing that boy anymore! We didn't raise you to join a cult. Go to your room and think about it'....(I'm pretending to be a parent... is it working?)

Seriously sweetie, don't get involved. You will most likely find yourself in a terrible situation when you try to leave the borg. If you can avoid the pain of that then you really should. Don't let them draw you in. They can spot emotional vulnerability and they swoop in. Please, stay well clear of any association with them. If you read the stories here of what people have to go through to leave the borg...well, I don't want you posting any similiar story here. You can avoid that. Stay strong. And Becs is right - he will ALWAYS put the organisation before you. It's a simple reality.

megs

I really thought I was ready to "move on", then she sends me this email! I had to close the door to my office because I just started crying... What is wrong with me?!! ARGHH!!! I'm not sure if I was crying over him or her or God or what! I think I'm broken

whitman

Honey, I wish I could give you a big hug. It's normal to cry - you've been through a lot. Maybe you should leave work, call a friend and go and do something fun.

I feel awful for you. Stay strong. Keep posting here if it is helping you get through the post-email emotional roller-coaster. We are here for you.

hubert

Meg, don't open any more e-mails from her. Just delete them.

You KNOW she's not going to side with you, so no need to go through the misery anymore.

I also agree with others here, he will put the org first.

Hubert

whitman

Megs, I have to go out for a while, but I'll check in on you when I get back.

Just breath. xox

Hope4Others

Perhaps that would be a good idea not to read any emails from her, things will get better, it takes time to get over feelings

for some one. Keep busy and hang out with some friends who make you laugh, so that you do not focus in that direction.

I could try to make you laugh......

h40

VoidEater

I hope this doesn't come across as too cold...

Someone please be my voice of reason and remind me of why this would be a bad thing...

Because he doesn't love you enough to let you have your own relationship with God - his love is conditional, or at least withheld, unless you worship God as he does.

Your faith (or lack thereof) is a sacred understanding that you develop for yourself. If he isn't giving you the respect to have your own opinions and faith, he doesn't love you - he loves what you might represent to him.

Would you want to be in a relationship with someone that doesn't respect you with a sacred trust?

Feeling Vulnerable

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