Banned from my sisters wedding (page 3)

chrisjoel

My heart goes out you. It hurts . When i was Dfd I went to the KH for the ceremony of my little brothers wedding, and after the talk, my middle brother came up to me and in front of all the relatives smiled shook my hand and said with a grin "Stay Out Of The Pictures!" and walked away. ..I really hope someday theyll realize what theyre doing.

Tired of the Hypocrisy

That STINKS!

I am sorry you got treated like this. I hope you feel better soon....

Smile, we love ya

journey-on

LunaFing....what cruelty! Not inviting your flesh and blood sister to one of the most important events in your life! She will

regret it one day and it will eat at her heart and soul. Right now she thinks she's doing it for God, but over time she will be

very sorry she excluded you. She will have to live with her "sin". Sorry for your pain, dear.

Quandry

Luna,

Very sorry to hear that you are being excluded. However, you did tell at least your mom that you no longer believe, so you can imagine how that makes alarms go off in the heads of any dubs, family or not. Perhaps at one time you'd have felt the same. I know I did for over thirty years.

I agree with the others about being kind to your sister. She will at this point expect you to be angry. Don't give anyone that satisfaction.

Tell her that you are sure she will be lovely in her dress, and that you could not wish her more happiness. Tell her this is a wonderful day to think about how much love she has for the person she will marry, and how much her family loves her.

I'll bet someday in the future she will regret not having you there.

str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up

For you Luna Fing!

((hug))

flipper

LUNAFING- My heart truly goes out to you. I have been treated this way as well by my youngest daughter also last year ! My wife and I were NOT invited to her wedding , but we attended the ceremony anyway , were respectful, and still gave her a card and monetary gift ! My other daughter had got married a year before , but because I've been inactive 5 years- I was NOT allowed to walk both my daughters down the aisle, which hurt deeply. But my wife and I didn't want to spoil the " dignity " of my daughters special day so we rose above the crap and tried to be respectful and polite. We went to the older daughters reception, but not the younger one as she is more against me. All we can do is be authentic, real, kind, and hope they get the clue in time and possibly change. But they are mind controlled robots who are in a cult - but it still hurts, I know. Hang in there friend. Peace out, Mr. Flipper

still-fading

Sorry to hear all that, it sounds like your both in a tough spot. I was raised a JW so I know how it all works. I guarantee the elders told her that "scripturally" there's nothing wrong with it, but it comes down to a "conscience matter." And I think we all know how "conscience matters" go, they are programed to say "NO." And I also bet she is being praised by elders and others on how such a strong and brave stand she is taking. That in turn will only feed her making her believe she is doing "the right thing." Remember, everything with them based on how it makes them look, she must look pretty damn strong in their eyes. And as I said that only validates her. Till she gets older and could start to realize what a mistake she made. Remember the "cong" comes before family every-time! Most times not by choice but by how they believe they are supposed to act. I short hang in their and try to love love her unconditionally even though that is surely conditional on their part.

Billy the Ex-Bethelite

LunaFing,

Sorry to hear about your situation. I wonder about the groom. Perhaps he's pressuring her in this decision. You know, that whole headship thing. It just seems kinda odd since you're not DFd. Even when I was hardcore, if I'd been marrying a JW sis, I'd have strongly encouraged her to invite everyone not DFd, and make sure the DFd knew when and where and to come to the ceremony. That's what I'd have done with my own family. Jeez, I don't get it. Dubs are supposed to keep the door open in hopes of a return.

Well, I guess you can keep the door open in hopes of her exit.

Best Wishes,

B the X

LearningMore

This is all so weird. I am getting married soon, so this hits kind of close to home. I'm not having the issues you all have written about, but I have had to consider who I would invite. It is weird to think that some of my old, old friends (but whom I haven't spoken to in years) maybe wouldn't come if I invited them because I am inactive and marrying a "worldly" man. I've just chosen not to invite them, and thus not worry about it. But, it is strange because I KNOW I am a good person, and my fiance is a good person...but we are still viewed as BAD in the eyes of many, many witnesses just because we don't believe the same as they do.

I feel very bad for you, Fern, because I can only imagine how hurt I would feel in your situation. However, I agree with all of the other posters who recommend sending her a nice card. One day, she will probably deeply regret her decision.

amama2six

Billy, that whole "headship" thing used to burn me up even when I was a kid! I'd watch the headcovering practice with women and think, "What makes us less than MEN?" Don't get me wrong, I don't think women are better either...I think we're different but equally important and certainly good enough to lead a study or say a freaking prayer the same as any guy. :mad: I wanted to take the headcoverings and shove them down the Elders' throats! I was a secretly angry child...lol.

Banned from my sisters wedding

Share this