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by Mandette 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mandette
    Mandette

    I just realized that I've jumped into these forums without even an introduction. Where are my manners?

    First of all I want to say that I was so happy to find this site. It's comforting to know that I'm not the "only one" that has issues with "that" religion.

    I was raised in it. My dad became an elder from the beginning of that "arrangement". My whole family is still in. I remember being 19 and being questioned if I was still a virgin. There was NO reason for the inquiry. Just an elder's arrogance and sick mind. When I said yes I was they wanted me to go to the Dr to have it PROVED to my parents. Idiot. Like the medical field can PROVE that. I told him so too. That didn't go over quite so well. By this time my 3 closest girlfriends had gotten out. I was trying to hang on(mainly cause of my parent's). This same elder reasoned that I must be the "ringleader" in convincing the others to leave. And it goes on and on. I left for a while and came back about the time I was 22 or so. I got baptized at 24. HUGE HUGE mistake. I did it for the wrong reasons. Of course the fact that I got baptized and walked away makes me even worse in the Society's eyes. In the past 2 yrs I was finally able to have a wonderful talk with my parents. I was able to tell them that I loved them more than anyone and if I could do it for them I would. But I can't be a hypocrite. They actually accepted that and I have peace in my relationship with them. My sister refuses to have anything to do with me. I can deal with that. I have my parents and that's all I ask. I do wish they would "see" things but at their age(80) I just don't want them to lose the hope they have. If it brings them peace then I'm happy for that.

    My stories go on and on as I know all of yours do too. I've seen so many things changed. The light keeps getting brighter?? I think the bulb burned out!!!!!!! I still have that gut wrenching knot come up some especially when we have huge events in the world(9/11 etc). So I have to keep telling myself that IF the end comes there's nothing I can do about it....I can't control it.....I can only hope for the best.....

    Even at my age they still have an effect on me. I HATE that. I wish I could be done with it completely. That religion has made me feel like a social misfit. I never learned to date. I trusted too much. All the things we're supposed to learn and do as teens never happened. I would say I still have a lot of resentment. I want to let that go. Being on here is a great help.

    I could go on and on but I'll end it here. I wish all the rest of you peace of mind and healing from what "that religion" (I have my own little phrase!) has done to you all.

    Mandette

  • LockedChaos
    LockedChaos

    Mandette

    Welcome

    I did the same as you before formal Introduction

    <shrug>

    Fairly accepting crowd here

    Nice to meet you

  • Mandette
    Mandette

    LockedChaos..

    THANKS! good to meet you too!!!!

    Hey you're a southern neighbor!

  • Quirky1
    Quirky1

    Welcome Mandette!

    You'll find some sincere people here but you will also find the same stuck up assholes you left in dubbityville.

    Quirky

  • gloobster
    gloobster

    Welcome Mandette!

    I think most of us have had pretty messed up experiences with the WTS. I only joined this forum about a week ago, but I'm really enjoying it. I haven't been near the Flawful and Disgusting Slug for a long time now, but there are many issues I have still not resolved, and this forum has been a real help to me. It's so nice to find people that know what you are going through, and find out that even if they shun you, you are not alone. That you should be thankful for it, regardless of the personal sacrifices you must make, and regardless of how painful or messed up it seems at the time. It gets better, and the "new light" you see really is light.

    Glad to have you on board!

  • uninformed
    uninformed
    I was raised in it. My dad became an elder from the beginning of that "arrangement". My whole family is still in. I remember being 19 and being questioned if I was still a virgin. There was NO reason for the inquiry. Just an elder's arrogance and sick mind.

    Some elders hide their perversity in plain sight.

    Glad you got out, took me 45 years to leave.

    Welcome

    Brant

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Welcome, Mandette

    I too have family with an elder in it. I'm in the apostacloset for him and grandmother who are 90. Too old to hurt at this time in their lives. It's touchy, for sure. I'm glad you're here.

    Dovey

    Edited to add: Dating? What's that? Aren't you supposed to already know you want to mary a person before you start dating them? That's not what dating is? Huh?

    You see that I'm just as dating impaired. It's pathetic.

  • Mandette
    Mandette

    Quirky..

    Just like in any place.....I try to ignore the blatent hatred. I can't be that way. How can I hate my parents? Even though they raised me in the JW's I have NO DOUBT that they love me. I've only hated one person in my life. (A dear friend of mine was murdered in 2005) I want my decisions to be tolerated so I try to practice the same thing when it comes to those that I care about that are still "in".

    Mandette

    PS. I can definitely UNDERSTAND and empathize with those in this forum that do have hatred. Many many lives have been torn apart by some of those horrific teachings(disfellowshipping etc)

  • ninja
    ninja

    mandette....I think you have a cheek coming on this forum without a formal introduction....I mean...who do you think you are?........he he....just kidding....ninja runs and hides.......(shouts from a distance....welcome to the board mrs woman)...yer new scottish mate....da ninja

  • sacolton
    sacolton

    We welcome you with open arms!

    Welcome to the family!

    The WTBTS has created a generation of hurt and abuse. So many here have suffered from the wrongs of the Society. I hope you'll stick around and give advice and support others.

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