witness 007
You say: I DO want out of this marriage but I love her dearly too, torn apart. I just find it hard.
I am reluctant to give advise nowadays, but you have answered you own question. You want out and yes you will find it hard.
I have many male friends who are now divorced. They all found it hell at the time - but are much happier now.
You are still so young with your life ahead of you and there are plenty of women out there.