My friend that is a JW spent the last week doing all kinds of things that go against everything I've been reading about JW's. For example, drinking, hanging out with "worldly" people, gambling, having sex outside marriage and just basically living it up and doing whatever they wanted. Now, they're at this convention for the last two days and they're acting like a robot, spewing bible verses and talking about how evil the world is with all it's problems and immorality.
What is it about these conventions that does this to the JW's. I've seen this happen to this person specifically over the last few years and each time it's the same exact pattern of behavior. Right before the convention starts, usually about a week or two they get really "worldly". I don't know any other word to use in this example. And then, as soon as they get in the door to the convention, it's like they morph into another being.
What is the deal with the convention? Does it effect a lot of people like this? or is my friend just an isolated incident?
What is it with these conventions?
by tryingtounderstandjws 11 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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tryingtounderstandjws
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jgnat
Steve Hassan explains this very well. Essentially, no-one gets completely assimilated by a cult. A cult personality resides along with the authentic self. Sometimes you see the genuine person underneath, other times the typical cultist who behaves just like every other cultist.
Hassan says keep the cultist calm, and address the authentic self. You do that by not directly threatening or questioning the religion, and reminding the person what makes them uniquely special.
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jgnat
If you dressed like them, you could walk in to a convention and look around for yourself. The event itself is intensely mind-numbing. Heck you could dress like anyone and get in. Only, people generally leave you alone if you look like one of them.
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Mandette
In witness jargon your friend is living a "double life". He's very very confused and most likely questioning all the JW stuff that he's fed. It's very difficult to leave that religion. If he does, most likely he'll lose his friends and family. A lot of JW's do that.(My sister refuses contact with me)
Continue to be his friend!!!! When I was in the process of leaving that religion my non-Witness friends were my lifelines. They showed me that I was not alone and that I wasn't going to be alone if I left that religion. Be patient with him. He's very torn right now.....That religion rules it's members by guilt and fear. That's one big reason that your friend is having such a rough time. The JW's teach that if you're not a JW or if you leave you will have no hope of salvation. That is a very scary thing to face. And one of the more difficult things to overcome. It's still hard for me and I've been gone for 15 yrs or so.
I'm glad your friend has someone that cares enough about him to try to figure out what's going on with him. If he manages to break away he will need a lot of support and reassurance that he is a good person whether he's a JW or not. Being a JW does not a good person make!
Mandette
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tryingtounderstandjws
I would not fit in or be welcomed. Long hair and beard. I've been told I look a lot like Jesus.
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tryingtounderstandjws
I told my friend a thousand times how wonderful I think they are. The problem is, they don't think they're wonderful. I've know them for over 15 years and it's heartbreaking for me to see them live like that.
Very unhappy, but unable to do anything about it for themselves. -
jgnat
I would not fit in or be welcomed. Long hair and beard. I've been told I look a lot like Jesus.
Ah, you could pass for a new convert. Wear one of those t-shirts with a tie painted on, jeans, and a suit-jacket. (You are making an attempt, after all). Carry a watchtower magazine under your arm. Tell everyone that "Lyle" has been studying with you. Smile a lot. Don't give anyone your phone number, but readily collect theirs. I've gone out of uniform and I get MORE attention, not less. All toothy smiles and all that. Everyone very nice. Expect EVERYONE to encourage you to stay for the DRAMA on Sunday. Woo woo. The highlight of the show.
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tryingtounderstandjws
I thought about going into that convention center, but I don't think I could fake it like that.
I've never been too good at that. I would probably seek out my friend and try to help them or just be there for them.
Having me go into that situation would probably cause them a lot more headache in front of their family and I couldn't do that to them. -
jgnat
Yes, if you sought out your friend it would be hard for him. The wrong side of his life would be showing up. It could send him in to a cognitive dissonant tizzy.
http://changingminds.org/explanations/theories/cognitive_dissonance.htm
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WTWizard
Going to these major events is really nothing more than a crackdown. They remind people to not do things that the Filthful and Disgraceful Slavebugger does not like, and harp on people giving up their lives and on the fake experiences of those who did and were supposedly blessed.
Just one more reason to blow it off if at all possible.