G'day from the Great South Land, Wish,
We are SO glad to 'see' you and welcome you to this sometimes happy, usually caring place. Please stick around awhile, you'll learn plenty about the deception of the Watchtower. BTW you'll find it referred to often as 'the borg' here.
I've come home late so have been able to read all the replies to your initial post and I am very pleased to read so many helpful comments. Thanks, guys and gals!
Eman makes the valid point that disfellowshipping (as practised by JWs) is UNSCRIPTURAL. I've capitalised that intentionally. There are no scriptural references to the judicial committees as practised by the Witnesses. Nor is there any reference whatsoever to restrictions improsed on re-instated ones, or on 'repentant wrongdoers'.
As far as smoking being a 'Gross Sin', I recall having to disfellowship persons for smoking in my time as an elder. In truth I was always troubled by this and it caused a number of earnest discussions with Mrs Ozzie over the years because I just could not see how we were justified in disfellowshipping brothers for it. Personally, I have never smoked and do not wish to, but I do not see how my personal preference should become a law for a whole association of people such that offenders are ostracised from the group. I can't see it.
We sympathise with your situation very much and many of us have a 'been there, done that' response.
The post by Lollylou is really amazing, as it reflects how I feel exactly.
You now have the opportunity of investigating everything you were led or assumed to be true. Take for example the matter of churches. Is it really true that they do not know or teach the Bible? What role does a minister play in the life of his congregation? Are they really "just interested in money and power" as the Watchtower claims? Check it all out but as you do remember that on your road you need to be looking for positive things to take the place of what you have left behind.
Whatever you do, don't be tempted to go back. Think if you will of the text that the Watchtower often uses "get out of her my people, if you do not want to share in her sins". Apply that to the Watchtower which has done so much harm to the spiritual and emotional lives of so many.
We wish you well and hope you find comfort.
Cheers,
Ozzie
"It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
Anonymous