How Life Can Change

by Sunspot 23 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    I don't come by here very often any more (trying to wean myself away from this board in anticipation of when we cannot ever post any more) but since walking away from the WTS 1999 and some six or so years afterwards, my life was filled a series of changes and adjustments with my family. A lot of bad feelings were being dealt with because of my shunning my oldest son and I have three grandchildren that had never laid eyes on me or knew me at all except for being "the grandmother who does not have anything to do with my Dad". Living a in very small town and having my DIL's many relatives everywhere.....added to the bad rap I was forced to live with. It has been a rough road.

    In the last couple of years, and leaving this mess in Jesus' hands, things have not only begun to emerge as "fixable", but have most definetely BEEN fixed at long last. I was invited to the youngest grandchild's (of this son) Sweet 16 birthday party last summer and I teared up when I realized that this was the FIRST birthday party of all three of these grandchildren that I had attended.

    We have been invited to Thanksgiving dinner ( for the fourth year) with our whole family and that of my DIL's family (she is one of seven) and to spend a few days at Christmas at another son's home. We attend a huge 4th of July party with our family and everyone's friends at another son's house, and a big end-of-the-summer party that includes several of our birthdays and anniversaries etc are all celebrated together. It has been great.

    The WTS rules had left this family shredded to bits. But these gatherings have done wonders to cement the gaping hole that being in the WTS had left many of us with, and no longer is there any worry about somebody showing up that will not be able to sit down and eat with the other one, blah blah blah....YOU know all those hideous WTS rules, regulations and requirements we HAD to live by to be "pleasing to God" ....They no longer apply to ANY of us any more....and what a marvellous difference this has made in bringing us closer together AS the family we should have been all the time. We have one daughter that remains a JW and has nothing at all to do with ANY of the family....even those that were never JWs, just a general blanket shutting off of them all. This does not advertise the WTS in a very good light....but that's okay.

    I can deal with family members on a whole new level now, with no problem of who is worthy of my friendship or who is not. Being a JW is SO downright judgmental and mentally isolating. ALL of that is gone now and we can be COMFORTABLE with one another now....and it feels SO good to feel this way! I can say that I am more at peace with myself and everyone around me, more tolerant, more forgiving of others, and more deeply happy than I ever have been. (I still speak out about the evil WTS on the online forums though, LOL! I have ZERO tolerance for those that try to puff up the Borg.)

    I buried a LOT of pain and sadness as a JW.....while waiting for "Jehovah" to fix things in the new order and while putting my life and my dreams on hold for three decades. Finding out that the WTS was a sham was also painful, but leaving that mindset and that WTS-approved ratrace was the best thing I have ever done. I never left God (as the WTS teaches) but have FOUND the Savior that had also been waiting for ME all that time. Without his hand in things, who knows where I would be today....but he IS there and I don't have to wait for him. I have SEEN, firsthand, what he has done for me! Once the way was cleared, many things took off in flight!

    I just wanted to put all this down so that others who are seeing all the horrible things this cult has done in the past and IS doing at present....while making all it's absurd claims of being the "only pure religion on earth....and if they are thinking of walking away from it....that there IS a wonderful, meaningful and fulfilling life after leaving! Do not let FEAR of the WTS stand in your way. The world is NOT as awful as they tell you...and there ARE some pretty great folks EVERYWHERE you go, that won't measure your worth OR their friendship towards you, by what faith or religion you may happen to be.

    I wish you ALL the best and I will be seeing many of you on other forums in the near future.

    hugs,

    Annie

  • compound complex
    compound complex

    Dear Annie,

    I'm very happy for you. It seems the "worldly" family that many of us virtually abandoned remains loving and forgiving upon our return. I'll be following in your footsteps very soon.

    I'm excited at the prospect of reconnecting with my family after 40 years of incarceration.

    Love,

    CoCo

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    Dear Sunspot,

    It is great to hear you are mending fences with family and trying to undo the damage this religion has done to your family.

    I have also reconnected with family over the past eight years or so and the holidays are a great time to do so. I can hardly believe that I even subjected myself to the nonsense of this religion.

    I cannot believe how I needlessly isolated myself like some nut who hides out in the hills fighting an imaginary war. I remember one lonely holiday season some years ago when I was 'active' in the religion. I had a long overdue epiphany and wondered if God was only pleased if I was looking at four walls alone. This was one of many news flashes that started me thinking and got my feet walking in the direction of the door out of the religion.

    I wish you all the best!

    LHG

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    Annie,

    Thank you for sharing your experiences. I'm very happy for you.

    -LWT

  • snowbird
    snowbird

    Dear Annie,

    I'm so happy for you.

    I'm still tearing down some fences and mending others.

    It will take some time, but hope springs eternal in this breast of mine.

    Thanks for taking the time to share this; I've missed you.

    Sylvia

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere

    HI Annie -

    What a lovely update. I'm so happy for you.

    Hugs!

    -Denise.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    So nice to hear. So glad to see you here today. I miss your comments, though I don't come around often myself these days. Life is too busy for me to be bothered often nowadays with Jw stuff. Thanx for sharing. Peace to you and your family. Isn't free air wonderful to inhale?

  • Gregor
    Gregor

    Annie,

    Thanks for sharing your experience. Similar to ours in many ways. Life is good outside the cult. Best regards, sweetheart!

    G

  • Trying2understand
    Trying2understand

    It's nice to see that there is hope. Hugs!

  • BizzyBee
    BizzyBee

    Wonderful, Annie! So glad you have most of your family back. Perhaps someday your daughter will see the light as well.

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