Yes. We were told not to talk about it or tell anyone about what happened to a family relative and Jehovah would take care of it. The elders sat in our living room and told us that if we called the police, the news would find out and make a fool of the witnesses and that they would not understand. Now that I'm an adult, I realize that this is cult behaviour.
As a JW were You Told to Not Report or Be Silent about Child Abuse ?
by flipper 34 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse
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crazyblondeb
Yep, it happened to me, when my stepdad was molesting me.
It took over 25 years for him to admit to it.
If anyone wants to read about it, look under my topic history......
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blondie
One of the events that moved me into leaving the WTS was how they handled a child abuse case I reported. I did report it to the secular authorities after I found that the elders were not "handling" it. Over the next few years, I saw a pattern in 3 congregations of not reporting it and only handling it when the secular authorities were brought in by other means than reporting by a jw. The lack of love and pattern of lying convinced me that any God could not approve of this organization.
It is impossible for me to believe that the elders would tell someone who had witnessed a murder to do nothing about it. But that BOE letter proves that the WTS will hide anything.
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Tuesday
None for me, I was never in the loop in the congregation though. I think I was safe from that because I had a father who was an unbeliever, also an avid hunter, vietnam veteran, former hockey goalie and professional boxer. Probably the fact he was 6'5 and 220 lbs was another good deterrant. LOL. I'm sure word got around about him and it probably saved my ass...ehem...I guess literally.
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flipper
SHOPAHOLIC- So the elder told you to not report it because , " the news would find out and make a fool of the witnesses ? " It actually proves the WT society is foolish by hiding it and not reporting it ! As you and others mention the main agenda the WT society has is protecting their " false reputation " as a respectable organization. But it's all fake and a facade.
CRAZYBLONDEB- I'm so glad you posted on here as I know how much you suffered in your situation my friend. I'm glad it finally came out to the elders about your stepdad so it wouldn't be hidden anymore. That's why I feel it's so important for everyone to be vocal about ANY child abuse taking place so it forces the elders to bring attention to it because of many voices ! Part of the disaster involving so much child abuse in the witness organization is the rank and file members DO NOT know all of this abuse is happening - because they are under " information control " lockdown so they are unaware of sexual abuse cases that ONLY the elders know about. That's why I made this thread. So people will see how much damage is REALLY being done !
BLONDIE- I'm so glad you were proactive in reporting child abuse to the authorities ! Good for you ! It's so true that the elders would only pursue or look into a child abuse case many times only if the police authorities were brought in by an outsider ( a non-witness ) . I agree - it definitely shows a huge lack of love and any authentic real caring for fellow humans in the Jehovah's Witnesses organization. If there is a God - no way would He approve of their organization and tactics !
TUESDAY- I'm glad you had a big dad to protect you growing up and I'm sure the fact he was involved in lots of physical activities and sports did deter some from ever abusing you. But I'm sure your dad also was watchful as well. I'm glad you never suffered child abuse
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chellechelle
flipper sugested i post this....
at the age of fifteen i was raped by my frist ever boyfriend and when i wet to the elders about this not only did they do nothing about it or to try and help me they told me that i should not press charges. because one it would not help me heal and twoit would be going through worldy courts and justice systems that are flawed and will not help me. gods court of law is more just. then they said i should not seek professional help to et over my feelings of violation, my ptsd, and my intense depression. they said i should put it on jehovah. as they shrink would only give me worldy opinions such as jsut get right back on the horse with dating... then this is the stupidest part. i was reproved from my actions in the matter.
this does not sound like a loving organization to me. thanks to this i have not been able to enjoy my relationship with my boyfriend as much as i could. sex is hard for me when i dont start it and if there is one ounce of pain even if mistaken i get flasbacks and immediately have to stop. it also has made me very compliant and not able to speak out when i feel hurt or controlled or anything such as that. it made me unable to function properly as a person and be able to give to someone else what i want to give. and unable to ask for what i need in return. if it was dealt with then who knows what could have become of me.
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mostlydead
chellechelle...I'm so sorry. This happened to my sister too. She was date raped, but because she was with a worldly man in an unsafe environment the elders dubbed it fornication and thusly reproved her, took away her privileges etc, etc. Even though she tried to fight the guy off. It took her 10 years to finally realize she'd been raped.
These men have a ridiculous amount of power in the minds of their flock. They add insult to injury with their ignorance and their directives from headquarters. I'm very sorry this happened to you, but it does sound as if you've sorted through what all happened and you know the issues you're dealing with. That's a good start. I hope that you'll be able to find whatever help you need to move toward healing. It's a long process, but as you say, dealing with it can effect your future peace and happiness. It's never too late to start.
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mostlydead
My sisters were told by the elders that if they talked about their abuse by our father they'd be disrupting the peace of the congregation and guilty of slander. Wait on Jehovah. Which we did for 12 years. In the meantime, another child in the family was molested by him. The elders didn't think the cases were in any way related (????????) and nothing was done this time either, because there was just the one witness, you see. That was when I knew I had some serious reconsidering to do about God and this organization.
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flipper
CHELLECHELLE- My wife and I are close friends to you . We deeply care about you. I am so sorry you suffered that injustice at age 15 being horribly raped . The elders as always advised you wrongly not to seek therapy or counseling to deal with your pain. Of course as you know their motives for doing so were totally self serving to protect god's alleged " organization ". It was wrong that you were reproved for the abuse given you. I'm so sorry it has affected your relationships down the line. It's good you recognize how it affected you in the long run, but I do hope you can get some counseling to deal with what happened to you. It will help you heal and move on from the abuse in time. Lotsa hugs to you friend.
MOSTLYDEAD- I'm so sorry for the abuse your sisters suffered. You are so right in that because this child abuse is ignored ; another one of your family members was abused ! It's disgusting the lack of attention the elders give to child abuse in the JW organization. That your family had to suffer for 12 years over this abuse by your father is a travesty of justice and a horrendous sin by the WT society and Jehovah's Witness elders involved in your sisters situation. I do hope your sisters have got counseling or some kind of healing since this happened. Please be assured of my sincere empathy towards your situation
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chellechelle
mostly dead- yes it was the same for me deemed fornication because i could have avoided putting myself int he situation. the first thing they said was well i shouldnt have ahd a boyfriend in the first place. and yes i couldnt go in service and i couldnt to talks or anything for three months. however atleast they saved me some pain and suffering by not actually announcing it to the cong.