A few weeks ago I sent an e-mail to an old friend. He and I served for many years together as elders in the same congregation. He is still a JW, but he stepped down as an elder many years ago, went back to college (he began studying when he was in college and quit college to Pioneer!), got his Bachelors and then a Masters degree and today is a leading expert on neurofeedback and is a mental health counselor and therapist.
Now, this guy and I were tight, and I know he had considerable doubts and issues with the WTS, because we talked about them over the years. I have a grandson that I thought might benefit from neurofeedback, so I wrote an e-mail asking this former friend for some advice and help for my grandson. I wondered if he'd even gotten the e-mail, as I never heard a word back from him. Today I found out that he did get it, but that he didn't even have the decency to reply to me, not even a note acknowleding that he got it and would talk with my ex-wife about it, as they are in the same congregation.
To say I was disappointed in him is an understatement, and I wondered what to do. Of all people, I thought he might still have some genuine humanity and decency and would treat me as a real human being. Instead, he is following the WTS hard line just like any other good sheep would. I decided I'd call him on it, as I think people in a cult should know when they are displaying that fact, so I sent the following e-mail to him.
I just talked with Wendy (my ex-wife), and she told me you'd gotten my e-mail on Feb 5 regarding Bryce. I wasn't sure if it had made it through to you. I'm glad it did, and thank you for talking with her.
Considering our considerable history together, and our former deep friendship, I thought you might have at least acknowledged my note with a reply. Your lack of response I would expect of a Claude B., not a John D. In fact, it was many a conversation with you over the years about our concerns with the WTS and some of its teachings and procedures that eventually led me to leave the Witnesses. I know that deep down, you've got your own issues, though I'm sure they remain hidden and unspoken.
I thought that, perhaps, with your level of education, intelligence and deep thinking on all things JW, you might have evolved a ways beyond the bronze age practices of shunning those we judge as unworthy of our consideration or compassion. I understand that you don't approve of the choices I've made in life, as I don't approve of some of yours.
I'm so happy to be free to deal with people honestly and openly and without constant judging of whether they are worthy of my being kind to them.Your lack of response was just further proof to me of what a normally decent person can become when they live their life following the rules created by a group of old men in Brooklyn who are trying to interpret the myths and stories of a bunch of ancient Middle East sheep and camel herders.
I'm not sure why I'm writing, as I'm sure you won't respond. I guess that it's just that I expected more of you, and I want you to know that. But I think also it's very hard to see how cultlike this conduct is until you're out of it, because no one who is not a Witness would even dream of acting like that, of pretending that an old friend simply doesn't exist. In the meantime, one gladly drinks the KoolAid!
John, I still think of you fondly as a friend. Some day we may even have a conversation again! How remarkable would that be, two people who think differently about things actually being able to talk and be friends!
S4
...OUTLAW
...OUTLAW