I would probably wait a year or so... let things calm down and get back to normal.
Then I'd take him on a hunting trip. Accidents happen on hunting trips ya know.
If Your Teenage Daughter Got Beat Up By Her Boyfriend.....
by minimus 47 Replies latest jw friends
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purplesofa
Sadly, though, lots of relationships turn abusive. In fact, 1 in 11 high school students report being physically hurt by a date.
http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/relationships/abuse.html
The first step in getting out of an abusive relationship is to realize that you have the right to be treated with respect and not be physically or emotionally harmed by another person.
Signs of an Abusive Relationships
Important warning signs that you may be involved in an abusive relationship include when someone:
- harms you physically in any way, including slapping, pushing, grabbing, shaking, smacking, kicking, and punching
- tries to control different aspects of your life, such as how you dress, who you hang out with, and what you say
- frequently humiliates you or making you feel unworthy (for example, if a partner puts you down but tells you that he or she loves you)
- coerces or threatens to harm you, or self-harm, if you leave the relationship
- twists the truth to make you feel you are to blame for your partner's actions
- demands to know where you are at all times
- constantly becomes jealous or angry when you want to spend time with your friends
Unwanted sexual advances that make you uncomfortable are also red flags that the relationship needs to focus more on respect. When someone says stuff like "If you loved me, you would . . . " that's also a warning of possible abuse. A statement like this is controlling and is used by people who are only concerned about getting what they want — not caring about what you want. Trust your intuition. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't.
Signs That a Friend Is Being Abused
In addition to the signs listed above, here are some signs a friend might be being abused by a partner:
- unexplained bruises, broken bones, sprains, or marks
- excessive guilt or shame for no apparent reason
- secrecy or withdrawal from friends and family
- avoidance of school or social events with excuses that don't seem to make any sense
A person who is being abused needs someone to hear and believe him or her. Maybe your friend is afraid to tell a parent because that will bring pressure to end the relationship. People who are abused often feel like it's their fault — that they "asked for it" or that they don't deserve any better. But abuse is never deserved. Help your friend understand that it is not his or her fault. Your friend is not a bad person. The person who is being abusive has a serious problem and needs professional help.
A friend who is being abused needs your patience, love, and understanding. Your friend also needs your encouragement to get help immediately from an adult, such as a parent or guidance counselor. Most of all, your friend needs you to listen without judging. It takes a lot of courage to admit being abused; let your friend know that you're offering your full support.
How You Can Help Yourself
What should you do if you are suffering from any type of abuse? If you think you love someone but often feel afraid, it's time to get out of the relationship — fast. You're worth being treated with respect and you can get help.
First, make sure you're safe. A trusted adult can help. If the person has physically attacked you, don't wait to get medical attention or to call the police. Assault is illegal, and so is rape — even if it's done by someone you are dating.
Avoid the tendency to isolate yourself from your friends and family. You might feel like you have nowhere to turn, or you might be embarrassed about what's been going on, but this is when you need support most. People like counselors, doctors, teachers, coaches, and friends will want to help you, so let them.
Don't rely on yourself alone to get out of the situation. Friends and family who love and care about you can help you break away. It's important to know that asking for help isn't a sign of weakness. It actually shows that you have a lot of courage and are willing to stand up for yourself.
Where to Get Help
Ending abuse and violence in teen relationships is a community effort with plenty of people ready to help. Your local phone book will list crisis centers, teen help lines, and abuse hotlines. These organizations have professionally trained staff to listen, understand, and help. In addition, religious leaders, school nurses, teachers, school counselors, doctors, and other health professionals can be sources of support and information.
You can also get involved at a school or community level as an advocate to help prevent future dating abuse. One example of a school-based program is Safe Dates. Talk to your school guidance counselor about starting a group or other ways to get involved in making sure dating abuse doesn’t happen to people in your school.
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Gregor
The night the committee met with the 20 yr old puke who tried to seduce our 12 yr daughter I followed him into the parking lot when he left the meeting. 3 elders ran out and got between me and him. I got even anyway, I turned him into the police (over the objections of the elders, one of them being his uncle.). He has to register as a sex offender in California for the rest of his life. I suggest involving the police in the situations described.
See the movie "In the Bedroom". Not the exact situation but pretty close...a movie that stays with you.
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Twitch
Ensure she was taken care of, physically and otherwise. Tell her that she should never put up with abuse, whether in love or not (should that be the case)
Ensure the "incident" was reported to the proper authorities.
Tell the boy to never come around again, via phone.
Then bide my time and formulate the plan for getting even one day, which I would,.....;)
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iceguy
I would take a knife and cut both Achilles Tendon's...that way I know my daughter could always run away from him!
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minimus
I think calling the police is a good start. I do think that if you personally went after someone, it only puts you in jail. However if someone happened to give him a beating, well, that's different.
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Gregor
I think all humans have an innate sense of justice and if the system isn't there to provide it, then all bets are off. I think Ron Goldmans father has been through some genuine agony beyond the grief of his son's murder.
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John Doe
Min, if your question was directed to me, let's just say it wouldn't be a figurative emasculation.
Sylvia
I don't think I would trust you with a knife.
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minimus
Not you, john Doe.
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John Doe
Or sharp fingernails, for that matter.