ANYONE IN SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP WITH JW (page 4)

Serena

The man I'm seeing is obsessed with the idea of being DF and loosing his family, says it hapened to him once before and he spent nine months in misery without them. But this doesn't make sense to me, I recently found out that his father is not JW and that they have thanksgiving dinner!!!!!!!!!!!! So how could any of them in the family be active in the faith while his parents have interreligious marriage??? What is the big deal that we date or whatever it was that we did, we might as well be strangers now. YES, I FEEL SO USED!

butalbee

Serena,
You should've listened to the good people on your last thread the "I feel so used" one. If you listened you wouldn't be in this mess now.
No, relationship with a JW can work unless one is willing to convert, and if you convert to his side, well, I'll save a straight-jacket for you in the funny farm!

Saint Theresa

Hell no. Life sucks, love sucks, then you die.

teejay

Serena,

Take the time to re-read what Seeker4 said above.

A key... THE key to the success of his marriage (all marriages) is that he and his wife have a respect and acceptance of the ways they are different. That is something that your JW beau is not likely to extend to you or anyone else outside of his religion. He may never come right out and say it, but if he's the average JW he thinks that unless you become a baptized JW you are doomed to be destroyed at Armageddon. That being so, he is not likely to want to get involved with someone that he thinks will be dead soon.

Just curious, but has he been a Witness for a long time? That may make a difference.

He said that we shouldn't see each other or talk on the phone for a while, does that mean that we are done?

Yes, but in the end it will be a good thing for you and your children.

He's scared of getting disfellowshipped. But he's not even an active witness. He seldom goes to meetings, and if I ask him a question about his faith, he anwsers but warns me that he hasn't been active in long time, his answers are always jumbled words, nothing like the reaction a true witness would answer to, but the one thing that he is sure of and that is the JW's is the truth. THE TRUTH. Even if he's forgotten or gotten confused on some of the religious beliefs, it's the truth.

A person's active status with the Witnesses is no indication of what they THINK. It's what they THINK, not what they DO, that determines whether your relationship with this man will last. From what you say above, he is a Witness in thought and your hopes of bonding with him in any meaningful or lasting way aren't very good.

... his conscience made him tell the elders that he was fornicating with a worldly one, big mistake in my opinion. A friend of mine says that pretty soon, they will convince him that I am satan tempting him to do wrong. I still love him and want nothing but to be with him. But I still feel used. I'm gullible, I look into his eyes and I melt like butter. I do though, sense that there is no future for us, call it womans'intuition, and right now I'm just trying to cling on to what we had.

Go with your intuition. It's 'god's/the Force's/Nature's way of telling you what to do. There's nothing wrong in what you did -- getting involved with him. You came to the relationship honestly, he didn't. You feel used? Hate to say it, but you were.

I don't know for sure, of course, but I'd probably guess that he was sincere at the beginning of your relationship but as time went on he began to realize that there were things deep within himself that were more important than he realized at first. That being his religion... better known as "his relationship with his god Jehovah." If I were you, I'd consider the relationship "over."

Peace,
tj

Ronny

I have recently met a girl who is a JW, and although we get along fine on a friendly level I feel she's beginning to feel more deeply for me, but at the same time I think she's beginning to sense the consequences of this and is starting to pull out of this beginning friendship. We have never discussed her believes yet though. We haven't contacted each other for quite a while now, and that was ok for me at first, but now as more time goes by I feel more and more drawn to her and I do miss her very much and yes, I think it's definitely love.
What to do?

ISP

Can't see the child issues working. The JW life of no birthday, Xmas...meeting attendance is not so good for kids.

ISP

tank3r87

hey guys, i just signed up. i agree with serena on the 360degree turn. I'm a singaporean, non-practicing catholic. i like this jw girl, and she likes me too. but just when things were getting better, theres like a "360degree" turn on her views. imagine smsing someone you like alot, then suddenly that person msgs back to tell you to stop msging.shocking aint it??? she has said earlier that things may not work out. but on this jw website, it states that its okay for a jw to marry outside of their religion just as long both parties respect each others beliefs. so its kinda contradicting.. and seriously, im starting to give on religion too. "hope is the first step to disappointment"

ANYONE IN SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP WITH JW