some leave & stay quiet...why do some rant/obsess like me/us?

by oompa 14 Replies latest jw friends

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  OnTheWayOut

  I can't answer your rhetorical/philosophical questions.
  
  I finally found it necessary to say more to my wife about why I have been in a foul mood whenever JW stuff comes up.
  She's been asking me to drive her to JW stuff when she's tired and has a rough day. I had told her I wasn't going to go near the hall after a few instances of taking her to JW stuff at other locations (different halls). I really wasn't able to tell her I didn't want to go near the hall where everybody knows me and will come out to the car and say "We miss you."

  I told her about what my mother said over a month ago.
  
  It started out with her trying to share some silly moment at the KH with me.
  
  Mrs. OTWO: So Brother XXXX had hurt himself, he was limping in the hall. Well, there was this problem on the platform and he comes running/limping up there and practically trips over the microphone....YADDA YADDA YADDA.

  OTWO: Thanks for sharing your day. Let me tell you what's been bugging me lately. It particularly has to do with asking me to keep crossing paths with the Witnesses. A year and a half ago, my mother said she would never shun me, no matter what. So about a month ago, she said that they had studied some article at the meeting, and she wanted to be sure that I don't DA ever. She said that the article said she would have to stop speaking to me. I asked her "Wouldn't you decide on your own with your mind instead of following some article?" She said "The article was pretty clear, so I would have to stop speaking to you. So just don't disassociate." So, Mrs. OTWO, my problem right now with Witness stuff is that I see my own mother just turning her brain off, not making thoughts for herself. It makes me mad when I think about it, and that's part of why I didn't want to drop you off at the hall the other day and hear the fake "miss you" comments from "the friends."

  It was all too much for Mrs. OTWO. I think she cried herself to sleep.
  Oompa, I think we try to keep things in, but it can do damage to our own mental psyche if we don't vent it out. I hope that helps.
• 

  no more kool aid

  Oompa, I think you can afford to more quiet and polite about it when it is your parents and extended family. But I don't think it is as easy when you are married to one, I would be the same way, every argument or decision would come back to the fact that you are a JW. Don't think I could do it.
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  oompa

  hmmm...otwo......this is new to me......i did not think you engaged your wife on jw stuff to the point of tears......i feel like an abuser this has happened so much with my wife.....i try the quiet logical approach.....and want to reason....but she gets very excited after a few exchanges and sometimes yells at me....pointing her finger in my face and shouting things like "you better never say that to me again".....and then scream out in pain as she runs out of the room crying.......it shakes her up for days as she walks around looking so sad....just drenched in it.....i gotta stop this madness.........oompa

  my last attempts will now only be in writing (i hope)....maybe ask some questions about an article she reads or a topic that is mentioned.......
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  dinah

  I think the answer for many of us is because we are PISSED OFF! This cult has farther reaching than I could have ever imagined. I've been out for 22 years now and I'm still angry about the normal childhood that was robbed from me. I have found it increasingly hard not to tell my mother exactly how I feel about her beloved "truth". I just keep my mouth shut to keep the peace.

  That is exactly how I feel. The anger has mostly gone away, but little things trigger it again at times. Usually it's something my Mom says that she heard at the meeting, or her telling me about the lastest df'ing and such.
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  OUTLAW

  Oompa..Your a ranting obsessor!..Thats why you rant and obsess..LOL!!..............Give your Mrs. some space..Your probably driving her crazy.................Take a vacation from trying to show your wife the truth about the WBT$..........................Take her out to dinner..No WBT$ Talk!!..LOL!!......................................................OUTLAW